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Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 4:45:28 AM

ProlificNeeds

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I'm interested to know if any bottoms/subs/slaves have ever mentored their specific dominant, or a dominant that they play with. Imparting wisdom or advice for someone is easily enough done, what interests me more is, if you are involved in a power exchange with someone, and you're on the bottom half of it, how well does that work for mentoring? Do you set aside times when you can sit down on equal headspace to have your discussions, or can they be done still without stepping from the power exchange?

These are mostly just curiosities as the topic came up in discussion and I wondered what the difference between theory, and practice is. Ideally, if a less experienced dominant seeks advice or wisdom from their bottom or sub, they can simply accept the opinions and suggestions for what they're worth in a mature fashion, but does power exchange make it more difficult or complicate the issue at times?

Inexperienced subs seek out experienced dominants to be a guiding force more often than not, so how well does it work if inexperienced dominants would seek out the mentorship of experienced subs? It seems logical to me but I may be missing a complication somewhere.

Any first hand experience and stories would be appreciated!

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RE: Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 5:41:59 AM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ProlificNeeds

Imparting wisdom or advice for someone is easily enough done, what interests me more is, if you are involved in a power exchange with someone, and you're on the bottom half of it, how well does that work for mentoring?

As long as they are secure in their dominance it works very well.

quote:

Do you set aside times when you can sit down on equal headspace to have your discussions, or can they be done still without stepping from the power exchange?

When needed but that has never had anything to do with the mentoring.

quote:

Ideally, if a less experienced dominant seeks advice or wisdom from their bottom or sub, they can simply accept the opinions and suggestions for what they're worth in a mature fashion, but does power exchange make it more difficult or complicate the issue at times?

Only if the people involved make it an issue.

quote:

Inexperienced subs seek out experienced dominants to be a guiding force more often than not, so how well does it work if inexperienced dominants would seek out the mentorship of experienced subs? It seems logical to me but I may be missing a complication somewhere.

I've gotten the feeling that many experienced subs don't really want to mentor inexperienced doms. It can feel too much like the dreaded "topping from the bottom" or somehow takes away from the dominance of the person they are with.

quote:

Any first hand experience and stories would be appreciated!

In the begining, I mentored Valyraen. I showed him how to flog (though not on him), taught him tricks with the drip candles, told him where was safe to hit and where wasn't. It's worked out very well for us.

Edited for clarity and better word use

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 7/24/2007 5:57:33 AM >

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RE: Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 5:45:40 AM

Archer

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Well if one addopts the viewpoint that senior bottoms outrank junior Tops in general then you end up with little problem being mentored by a bottom. I didn'tget a formal mentoring but I did get informal mentoring from various tops and bottoms in the communities I have been involved in. Early on I certainly learned alot from the bottoms who gently topped from the bottom to teach me several skillsets.

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RE: Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 6:09:43 AM

hannahmay

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personally i dont think there is anything wrong with a sub mentoring if she has more expirience and knowledge, so long as its done in a polite way i think its great to learn from each other. so long as ultimatly we all know our positions i think its fab to share knowledge and expertise.

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RE: Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 7:19:43 AM

SimplyMichael

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I wouldn't want to be involved with a woman who couldn't teach me something. Now there is a vast difference between "hey stupid you are doing it wrong" and "want to know a way to do that that will drive me insane with lust"!

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RE: Mentoring from the bottom? - 7/24/2007 7:25:35 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Well most long term relationships will definitely be happy to share how their slave has taught them over time and helped them become a better person.

The issue only arises when you say "Doms are the ones who teach and give and subs are the ones who learn and accept"

Once you realize how foolish that is, you're free to act as you please.

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