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What to do - 6/29/2004 3:02:45 PM

angelelic1

Posts: 1
Joined: 3/11/2004
Status: offline

I am getting ready to meet a new Dom and his sub. I am very new to the lifestyle and am unsure of what to do on the first meeting??? I have never been trained and i just feel lost. Any help is appreciated.

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RE: What to do - 6/29/2004 3:11:17 PM

EStrict

Posts: 729
Joined: 1/11/2004
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The first RL meeting is a time and place to meet. Be yourself, be honest, and don't runs things.

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Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive anyway...

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RE: What to do - 6/29/2004 5:17:54 PM

sarbonn

Posts: 203
Joined: 3/23/2004
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Have some coffee and ask for some ID. At this point, it may be hard to realize it, but both sides are trying to impress each other. This is the one time you have to actually get to know them as people. If they can't socialize with you in person without the bdsm looming all around you, then that should be a warning there's something possibly wrong.

That first coffee meeting is a great opportunity to find out that even though she's extremely hot and you've heard everyone say they want to serve her, letting her open her mouth can reveal she's a verifiable nut-case who may have escaped from the looney bin. Oh, sorry, that's just a moment from MY past coming to the surface.

Get to know them. It's so much easier in the beginning before you start playing than during or after.

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Give a man a fish, he eats for a day...
...teach a man to fish, he steals your fishing hole and then charges you for the fish.

(in reply to angelelic1)

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RE: What to do - 6/29/2004 5:37:54 PM

confusetheswede

Posts: 48
Joined: 4/5/2004
From: THE DIRTY DIRTY
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meet at a restruant and have a meal. it's not a good idea to have any kind of sexual intercourse without truly knowing them. ask them a lot of personal questions and make sure they don't have any diseases. muah xoxo

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The Scorpio with hazel eyes.

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RE: What to do - 6/29/2004 6:14:10 PM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
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I generally provide all my pertinent information prior to meeting so the person can give it to their safe call...

Just me, could be wrong.

Sinergy

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RE: What to do - 6/29/2004 7:27:08 PM

MizSuz

Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelelic1

I am getting ready to meet a new Dom and his sub. I am very new to the lifestyle and am unsure of what to do on the first meeting??? I have never been trained and i just feel lost. Any help is appreciated.

Hi angelelic1, welcome to the boards.

As to your question, my suggestion would be to remember that consenting to a meet is not consenting to submit. Until you consent to submit you are not bound to give your power away and, in my sometimes not very humble opinion, quality bdsm participants are really seeking people who come to the table whole and are confident in their worth. Throwing your submission around (or for that matter your dominance) to anyone who asks for it or expects it diminishes it. You only owe polite interaction until you agree to give more. Remember that agreeing does not negate your responsibility for your own choices and well being.

Oh dear, this sounds a bit like a soapbox. I think I'll step off...

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to angelelic1)

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