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Quid pro quo - 7/1/2004 8:41:13 PM

soulsubmission

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I was given the collar of conideration a few weeks ago. I understand my position with Him, and know I am in the box. Our relationship is 99.9% perfect.Problem is, I KNOW he loves me, yet when he tops another bottom, I get so jealous I cannot stand it, and it hurts like hell. Are there ANY bottoms that can help me get beyond this so my Master and i are 100% complete. I am at my wits end and i don't want to leave him, but what other recourse is there?

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/1/2004 8:55:41 PM

MistressDREAD

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[walks in and has a seat on the subbies bench]
soul there is no room in ANY relationship for jealousy.
Especially in a relationship thats based off of more then
two. If you cannot remove jealously from your being then
you are not ready for any relationship with anyone and will
only end up always hurting and alone. Or maybe you get
off on this feeling?? Search inside your self deeply because
jealosy is not His problem but yours. One other thing, you
cannot KNOW He loves you after only a few weeks of a
collar of concideration. If you have only had on the collar
for a few weeks and are allready hurting like hell in the
relationship, as you say then THIS relationship is NOT for You nor Him. JMO

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/1/2004 9:32:01 PM

sarbonn

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I see it as a situation where you have to make a decision of whether you are able to exist in a relationship where your partner has multiple partners or if you are not. There is nothing wrong with deciding that you want to be in a monogamous relationship with someone, if that is the decision that you make.

There are no absolutes in submission or slavery; you define what type of relationship you are willing to enter into.

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/1/2004 9:54:32 PM

proudsub

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From: Washington
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There have been several threads on this subject. Here is one of them:

slaves jealousy

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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/6/2004 1:37:23 PM

Silvertonguedevl

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Soul, I have no cure for jealous feelings, but they will poison a realtionship, and will make things bad for you, and for your partner. Stay honest with yourself, as you may be able to deal with it, or pretend you can, for short periods of time, but unless you are confident enough in yourself, and in your mate's sense, then it will ruin what could otherwise be an exciting and beautiful relationship. It is impossible to know another's heart, so trust your own. If it hurts your heart to have this happen, then learn to find the edge of the pain, or learn to find the door.

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/6/2004 2:47:34 PM

iwillserveu

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Did you talk this over with your SO before? Are you talking it over now? What could I add of relevance? Your feelings are your feelings.

< Message edited by iwillserveu -- 7/6/2004 2:48:29 PM >

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/6/2004 2:50:56 PM

iwillserveu

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quote:

If sumone asks a question of
a certain area it is with the idea
in their minds that they want
those folks in that areas opinion.

I wonder who said that?

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When the Lady smiles i can't resist her call. As a matter of fact, i don't resist at all. Well that depends if it is a smile or a grimmace.

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RE: Quid pro quo - 7/6/2004 3:32:50 PM

anthrosub

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Talking about your feelings with your Master is important naturally. I would suggest taking some time to understand the nature of jealousy itself. Most people think they know what feelings are by name but don't examine the inner workings of how they come about.

What I'm about to say may sound odd but it comes from years of studying what it means to be human. So without further introduction...

Jealousy is not something you "get" (like a cold). It's not something you can remove (like the clothes you wear). When you feel jealousy, you "are" jealousy itself (as opposed to "being" jealous). What I'm driving at here is try not to separate yourself from your feelings. This is a very typical approach in western cultures.

The reason I say this is because the more you try to distance yourself from what you're feeling, the more energy and authenticity you give it. Think about it...don't you find the feelings grow the more you struggle with them? And why are you struggling in the first place...because you're rejecting them...and in doing so, you're actually rejecting yourself, which is impossible...and that's how the cycle starts.

Accept the jealousy as being what you are in the moment and you will be able to look into it with a clear mind and perhaps come to some better understanding of yourself in the process.

Remember that the English language is (i assume it's your native tongue) what you use to think with and built into the English language is the concept of the experience and the experiencer. This is an illusion of culture. In reality there is no separation and we habitually fall into this trap.

anthrosub

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