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A new slave's question


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A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 11:15:09 AM   
solesta


Posts: 18
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline
How does a slave get pass the fear of asking for a need to be helped with ? Weather it is as simple as needing a hug to help moving something cause her body isn't able to ?? How does she know that her needs what ever they are are not something that is bad ?? I lived 6 years with a man ( not of the lifestyle ) that I got to the point that i was afraid of asking for help. Now I have a Master that is upset that I don't so how does one ask ??
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 11:26:50 AM   
Raphael


Posts: 263
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline 		Perhaps you could start with 'Master, please help?'

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 11:31:47 AM   
nenakajira


Posts: 221
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: solesta


How does a slave get pass the fear of asking for a need to be helped with ? Weather it is as simple as needing a hug to help moving something cause her body isn't able to ?? How does she know that her needs what ever they are are not something that is bad ?? I lived 6 years with a man ( not of the lifestyle ) that I got to the point that i was afraid of asking for help. Now I have a Master that is upset that I don't so how does one ask ??


There is really no answer other than 'trial and error'. If you want to know that something will or will not upset your owner your best bet is to sit down and ask him. Once you know what is acceptable then when you ask for it and do not receive a negative response it will, hopefully, reassure and reinforce what he told you.
Over time that fear of upsetting him will lessen as you learn his reactions.

Good luck
nena{R}

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 12:27:07 PM   
nella


Posts: 1243
Joined: 12/30/2004
From: Norway
Status: offline 		Speak whit him, sit down and talk aboute how you two will handle things like that, for there is no universal answer.

(in reply to nenakajira)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 3:36:45 PM   
krys


Posts: 611
Joined: 8/24/2005
Status: offline 		I went through something similar solesta. I take from your post that you are not asking how to phrase asking for help but rather how to allow yourself to ask for help without expecting to be jumped on or dismissed. Well, all I can tell you is, it takes time. If your Master is not already aware of whatever issue you have with asking for assistance, the best thing to do is tell him. Everything. Its not really up to you, as a slave, to decide what needs are bad. They are what they are, if your Master is not aware of them, not fully informed, he does not have the essential information he needs to choose what he feels is best. And that's not really fair to him. For me, the hardest part of being a slave lies in allowing myself to be vulnerable in any way to anyone. But I do work on it, and it does get better and easier with time.

The good news is, there are some really great slaves here to talk to, who understand.

_____________________________

Krys

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: A new slave's question - 9/12/2005 6:28:12 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: solesta


How does a slave get pass the fear of asking for a need to be helped with ? Weather it is as simple as needing a hug to help moving something cause her body isn't able to ?? How does she know that her needs what ever they are are not something that is bad ?? I lived 6 years with a man ( not of the lifestyle ) that I got to the point that i was afraid of asking for help. Now I have a Master that is upset that I don't so how does one ask ??


Greetings and welcome solesta,

It is said a Master aches toknow his girl from the most intimate detail to the most mundain.We also have an obligation to our Owners to bring our "needs" to them. OurOwners, tyically will meet our needs or try to where with wants, they will pick and choose towhat they wish.

If there is something that is uncomfortablefor me to speak to my Master about asIsitat his feet I am allowed to writemy requests in my daily journal. He will then bring it up in His time and at His convience.

If it is an immediate need, I simply beg to speak openly. If granted I then speak my mind, wiht respect of course.

Nika{Phoenix}
His gothic slave


_____________________________

"Life is neither a bed of roses nor a carpet of thorns, it's just what you make of it."



(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: A new slave's question - 9/15/2005 9:03:53 AM   
solesta


Posts: 18
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline 		thank you all who have helped. I think my bigest problem is the fact that I'm not only trying to prove to him but also myself that i can do what I was able to do before the accident. And I built myself up to not need anyone for 7 years and now to have a Master that wants to be so in to my life is strange. I had guy friends but when I hurt about anything they never knew nor cared and to me that was fine, but now I have a Master what wants to know my every feeling and all. And I want to show him them but there is a part of me that still wants to not bother him with it. I guess one day I'll stop this type of " taking control " of my self and learn to give him all of me no matter how crazy it feels.

(in reply to Phoenixandnika)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: A new slave's question - 9/16/2005 7:14:26 PM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline 		By simply asking Him, what is acceptable and not acceptable. Asking him, what is the appropriate way to "ask" What are the appropriate things to ask about? Ask Him these questions.

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: A new slave's question - 9/17/2005 12:23:42 PM   
TristanofTreve


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/7/2005
Status: offline 		I can mostly only speak from how I am, but I do know a lot of Masters tend to share this same view. I am one that is more than willing to help a slave with doing something but ONLY if she begs for that help. I feel the slave needs to learn to rely on her Master from time to time, but should also know that there are things that need to be asked for. To be honest, I will sit and watch a girl struggle with something until she begs for the help. I will ask if she is doing okay, and even hint that she could beg for help, but won't do anything until she begs.

It is hard, I know, to ask that first time...but even Masters know that a slave can't truly do "everything." There are some things your Master will feel you should do on your own and as you ask for help you will learn them. As for asking for help with "needs" that is a different story and something you will need to talk with your Master aobut. Some enjoy having a needy slave beging and pleading for their needs to be dealt with by their Master....some don't. Trial and error again will help with that but so will discussing with your Master.

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: A new slave's question - 9/18/2005 5:12:18 PM   
nella


Posts: 1243
Joined: 12/30/2004
From: Norway
Status: offline 		Sounds a bit unpractical though, to want to help but not helping unthil she say so and so.

(in reply to TristanofTreve)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: A new slave's question - 9/18/2005 5:15:29 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10836
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Exactly, or if "help" is wrong, insert whatever predicate is more appropriate.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Raphael

Perhaps you could start with 'Master, please help?'


(in reply to Raphael)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: A new slave's question - 10/4/2005 9:44:40 PM   
SirSix72


Posts: 347
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Interesting question you have answered, although I have one question for you,,,do you have a journal that you write in everyday? I have bella to write all of her feelings,,,desires,,,needs,,,and the mundain things so that I can truly get to know her for whom she is,,,sometimes the things that one writes is better than trying to ask,,speak or beg to be heard

Master Six

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: A new slave's question - 10/5/2005 2:11:07 PM   
Webmaster60


Posts: 396
Joined: 9/10/2005
Status: offline 		Speaking for me..
Not only should you beg for help, but it is your duty. a slave is bound to open herself fully to her Master. Nothing may be withheld from him. Not only does he own your body, but your mind as well. You must relate (always respectfully) your wants and needs, fears joys. He may or may not react to these things, but it is your duty to tell him. NOT telling, would get you whipped if you were mine.

Master Michael

_____________________________

Master Michael
~~~~~~~~~~
"To sin in silence when he should
speak makes cowards of men"

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: A new slave's question - 10/7/2005 7:33:41 PM   
solesta


Posts: 18
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline 		Thank You all who have helped. Yes I'm told to do a journal but now that I have a job that has gone out the window cause of time. ( I dont' drive yet cause of a car accident and Master takes me ) so that time that I was useing to do my journal is lost cause I'm not near a computer. And at night I feel ( and he enjoys me ) I should be at his side doing what ever he needs of me. So now I've got to figure out how to do one and it be well done for him. Now I have to learn to take care of the slave chores, household work, job, and mom things I have on my plate now. So asking for help is just a small part of my issues.

Thankfully Master has taken it on his self to help with household chores but I sort of feel guilty that he is but also thankfull that he is.

(in reply to Webmaster60)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: A new slave's question - 10/8/2005 7:14:30 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9257
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		OURS usually approach after our evening meal while DIANE AND I enjoy our quiet time...I hear in a sweet voice"SIR can we talk" We keep a pretty tight hold on OUR darlings and we know when we need to chat...A journal is a fine idea if the SIR keeps check on it..We are always open to a girl approaching if she has a problem...BOUNTY

_____________________________

I AM TRYING TO WIN THE LOVE OF MY LIFE BACK, WHY IS IT SO MUCH HARDER THE SECOND TIME AROUND...ONE CHANCE, SMALL STEPS...I LOVE YOU BABY..

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: A new slave's question - 10/8/2005 7:16:02 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9257
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		MINE usually waits till DIANE and I are enjoying the evening after our meal and then they approach with"MASTER can;t we talk"in a sweet voice that one can;t refuse...DIANE ANDi keep close watch over our darlings and expect them if they have a problem to approach but like others have said many differnt ways one may approach their SIRS/MAAMS...Some are more open then others you will find a way if done in the correct manner..BOUNTY

< Message edited by BOUNTYHUNTER -- 10/8/2005 7:17:10 AM >

_____________________________

I AM TRYING TO WIN THE LOVE OF MY LIFE BACK, WHY IS IT SO MUCH HARDER THE SECOND TIME AROUND...ONE CHANCE, SMALL STEPS...I LOVE YOU BABY..

(in reply to solesta)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: A new slave's question - 10/9/2005 2:24:05 AM   
LGslave


Posts: 11
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline 		when i need help lifting something downstiars of even upstairs i simply approach Master and say please my Master could you and he will normally say yes
have you discussed with your owner that you have a fear of asking related to your past he can help you by putting your mind at rest.

property of LG

(in reply to Raphael)
Profile   Post #: 17
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