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How does it start - 2/18/2008 11:44:14 AM

Dmon

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A question I have for those, like me, who believe D/S role during play time an only play time. How does your scene start? I find that in cases where I"m going to be dommed. I often leave it to the Domme to make the initial instigation, but only slowly sink into the role at first. It's as if I have to get out one last burst of ego, and when I say "Yes Mistress" for the first time, it's more a flirt than anything else. After that, it's all humility and servitude, or atleast that what I'm going for.

As a Dom, I simply instigate the scene, with an even tone "Are you ready?" And though I allow for that last burst of ego to come out, I've more likely been met with nervous and tenetive asnwers, instead of somthing flitatious, or friendly.

I'm just wondering how play time starts for others. Everything I read about my fellow switches leads em to believe that, we of this gray area, are more diverse than Dom's or sub's. So let here how it gets started for you.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 12:25:49 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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FYI if you get into Ds during play time only, it might be more clear to use "top" and "bottom" since that's how they are generally used.

We aren't more diverse.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 12:38:21 PM

oliderid

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Personnally I have no formal starts like "yes mistress". BDSM is totally linked with vanilla sex in my life. For example, you had fun together, a good romantic diner after a long working day. You kiss her,... Then you push it a little deeper...While kissing her you hold her arms in her back, a strange mix of romantism and domination...Then you push it a little deeper, long french kiss...So long.She won't notice that she is against a wall now, unable to escape, your knee between her legs pressing gently her pussy. Then you push it a little deeper...Slowly... You leave her hands, you keep eyes contact, you smile and you undress her slowly...Take your time...And then the magic happens, she is nude, you aren't. Until now, no BDSM related word, nothing formal. You can talk with a beautiful nude lady in front of you now. What about having another glass of wine...The evening will be long.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 1:13:43 PM

laurell3

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I never use any type of script. How it starts is how I feel like starting it at the time or how they do (the fact I'm in a top role doesn't mean to me that a bottom can't initiate sex). From something simple to something elaborate it really all depends on what's going on between us.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 2:28:38 PM

oliderid

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Concerning this D/S vs Top/Bottom.
In French or in Dutch there is no difference as far as I know. Do you know whete it comes from?
I suspect some BDSM lifestylers who don't want to be assimilated with amateurs like me ;-).

I remember a quote I have seen on this forum:
Dom(me)/Sub is what you are, top/bottom is what you do. Subtile. but I still have to meet a 100% dom(me) or a 100% sub. If we are talking about domination or submission...We all had to do both in this life. You had to obey to your parents...Or you had to take the lead in your job.Being 100% dom(me) means that sooner or later you will end up in jail, being 100% sub you should be dead by now. So what is a [real] dom(me) or a [real] sub? It truly puzzles me.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 5:35:54 PM

Dmon

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

FYI if you get into Ds during play time only, it might be more clear to use "top" and "bottom" since that's how they are generally used.

We aren't more diverse.

I think we are more diverse. I can't find two switches that are even closely alike. The top and bottom dynamic seems different for everyone. And that doesn't sound like a bad thing, either.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 8:22:43 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dmon
I think we are more diverse. I can't find two switches that are even closely alike. The top and bottom dynamic seems different for everyone. And that doesn't sound like a bad thing, either.

My partner and I are very much alike, and we are both switches :)

The dynamic is different for everyone- this includes vanillas, and non switches.

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RE: How does it start - 2/18/2008 9:49:59 PM

Dmon

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[/quote]
My partner and I are very much alike, and we are both switches :)

The dynamic is different for everyone- this includes vanillas, and non switches.
[/quote]

I'm very happy for you. I bet it's wonderful being that in tune with each other.

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RE: How does it start - 2/19/2008 4:55:56 AM

vampiresscammy

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when I'm feeling submissive, playtime usually starts when I put my collar on, or when I kneel to Master, or on rare occasions when Master grabbed me and put my collar on

when I'm feeling Dominant, playtime starts when I grab the flogger, or when I tie my lovers arms over their head, or on most rare occasions when an oppurtunity arises and I begin to hunt my prey

our time is limited with real time responsibilities, but we make the most of what we can

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