RE: bbw submissives? (Full Version)

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bestbabync -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 2:33:42 PM)

it was both realtime & email.

thick skinned?  i am just fine.  i asked a question on here at a moment i was more angry than hurt.

i am sorry i even asked or posted here now!  i posted the same question on another site thread and recieved alot of support!

this site is very cold and odd sometimes.




BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 3:03:22 PM)

I often wonder why people choose to put so much emphasis on what is just one aspect of the whole person?

I am not what people refer to as BBW, but I would call myself curvy.  But so what?  I also have green eyes, black hair and I'm 5'10".  So what? 

Those are just some physical attributes and not the whole of who I am as a person. 

Instead of asking why someone would or wouldn't want you (generic you here) because of a physical attribute, I think more people should delve a little deeper.

When I see profiles (and particularly profile names) that describe a woman by her size, ~to me~, it appears that this is where she puts her emphasis, rather than on the many things that make her the woman she is and the woman she can be.

I don't think I've ever heard a guy say that he ended a relationship with a woman because of her size.  Mostly I hear that they ended it because she was a psycho bitch, a nag, a smothering cling-on and other reasons, but not because she was overweight.[sm=dunno.gif]







lizcgirl -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 3:37:52 PM)

People will be attracted to what they find attractive, whether it's size, attitude, eye color, height, etc. I know a lot of guys who love women with curves and 'meat' on them, and I also know guys who only date model thin girls. To each their own. I'm thicker than all of the other girls my Master has been involved with and at times I worry. But I serve Him well and please Him and He thinks I'm a 'very sexy cum slut'. lol No matter who posts what, we can't change how people will view us or what they find attractive. I understand you felt attacked by some of the responses, but in the few months I've been on here I've seen weight brought up more than any other topic. It does end up feeling very repeative. Every one has their opinions and they will voice them how they see fit. If the topic is sensitive enough for you to be easily offended, perhaps it's better to discuss it in private with people who you trust and value their opinion. I'm sorry you were so dishearted by the responses you got, it happens. Don't give up on finding some one who will cherish you for who you are, or on trying to be comfortable in your own skin. Just try to not take it so personally, even though it maybe hard.




corsetgirl -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 4:00:21 PM)

It is all based upon the question of how you feel about yourself.  There are some masters who will state on their profile that they would prefer those who are lighter in weight and some who like the BBW's.  I am a BBW but I also know that I am 5'1", which in my case, is not very healthy for the weight I am carrying.  I am trying to lose weight because I want to get healthy and this is not for anyone else's benefit but mine.   

I have had doms who stated they were attracted to BBW's, that attitude is more important than appearance. However, I have found in my area, that most of these "sincere doms"  are just looking for the play, they don't want to get to know me a someone as a human being or even a friend. 

It can be frustrating and discouraging sometimes, but I believe there are doms who truly care about what the subs have beyond the appearances such as attitude, willingness to serve, and being cherished.   Please take heart, there are doms out there who love the curves but will also love you for who you are, not just the sexual parts.  I am one who is looking for the total package in a dom and have learned to develop a thicker skin. 

I wish you well.




MrrPete -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 5:14:59 PM)

After reading your profile I see most of the activities I like on your Hard Limits list so why should I contact you?

I don't mind a slave with a few extra lbs regardless of height BUT I draw the line at 200 lbs Over that you have to have something else going for you.

I suggest finding workshops or seminars on your Har Limits items and see if they really are hard limits.




OrionTheWolf -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 6:40:08 PM)

I often wonder why people choose to have green as their favorite color. That is just one aspect of the spectrum. I know people that do not like green at all. I mean that is really unfair to all the other colors in the spectrum.

People have preferences in what they find attractive. It is how people are built, it is not a conscious thought process .

I prefer slender females, always have and likely always will. I do not find BBW's attractive. That is just me, and I realize there are others that do find them attractive, which is great. I do not put so much emphasis on it, but it is one of the first things that catches my eye. I want and have the whole package, and people should not settle for anything less than what they want.


quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

I often wonder why people choose to put so much emphasis on what is just one aspect of the whole person?





Kalista07 -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 7:33:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

I prefer slender females, always have and likely always will. I do not find BBW's attractive. That is just me, and I realize there are others that do find them attractive, which is great. I do not put so much emphasis on it, but it is one of the first things that catches my eye. I want and have the whole package, and people should not settle for anything less than what they want.
quote:



Greetings Orion,
Please forgive me, as i'm  not trying to be intentionally obtuse, but have a sincere question. You are not intentionally implying that if a woman  is not "slender" she is not the whole package are You?

i find this entire thread pretty frustrating..... In fact, i think a lot of this could be boiled down to common curtesy.  If You have a preference great for You!!! If You don't great for You!!!!  But for the love of all that's holy please do not insinuate that i am the anti-christ simply because i am over-weight.
Kali





bestbabync -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:10:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrrPete

After reading your profile I see most of the activities I like on your Hard Limits list so why should I contact you?

I don't mind a slave with a few extra lbs regardless of height BUT I draw the line at 200 lbs Over that you have to have something else going for you.

I suggest finding workshops or seminars on your Har Limits items and see if they really are hard limits.




no, just like you do not like 200 pounds or more, i have my hard limits.  i do not like older men, 55+ years old, but that is my preference.  just like assholes, lol....we all have them! 
folks, really my biggest problem is with the abusive, opinionated and hateful people i have found in this lifestyle.  this lifestyle is full of the unnormal, the deviant, the off the beaten path!  you would think the people here would be more tolerable and accepting of others and not so damn hateful!  that was the purpose of my initial post.  maybe i did not word it correctly and that is what brought on the insults and the jokes. 
i have found many friends and prospective Dominants, so i am doing ok. 




CalifChick -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:25:41 PM)

Ahhh, there's the problem.  You are expecting people who happen to like kinky sex, or who identify as dominant, etc., to be better than anyone who doesn't.  We are no different, no better and no worse, than the rest of the world.

Reading your OP, you seem to expect men who identify as dominant to be different than men who are not into D/s.  After all, you didn't ask what men think of BBWs, you asked what dominants think, as if that makes a difference.  Men are men, regardless of their sexual inclinations, and they are all going to have their preferences.  Perhaps you didn't mean it this way, but it does sound shallow to ask what dominant men think about it, as opposed to just men.


Cali




BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:28:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

I often wonder why people choose to have green as their favorite color. That is just one aspect of the spectrum. I know people that do not like green at all. I mean that is really unfair to all the other colors in the spectrum.

People have preferences in what they find attractive. It is how people are built, it is not a conscious thought process .

I prefer slender females, always have and likely always will. I do not find BBW's attractive. That is just me, and I realize there are others that do find them attractive, which is great. I do not put so much emphasis on it, but it is one of the first things that catches my eye. I want and have the whole package, and people should not settle for anything less than what they want.


quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

I often wonder why people choose to put so much emphasis on what is just one aspect of the whole person?




The part of my post you quoted is about the women who emphasize their size in their profiles and profile names, rather than sharing who they are as a whole person, not just the physical shell they walk around in.

There are so many things that may or may not make a person attractive to, or compatible with another. 

You say you prefer slender women, which is fine!  We all have our preferences.  But would you really be attracted to a profile that said something like, "I'm a slender woman and if you have a problem with that, then don't waste my time!"  That doesn't tell you anything other than her size and that she seems to have a chip on her shoulder about her size.

My point is why do women put so much emphasis in their profiles about that one thing, totally ignoring the rest of who they are?  I don't get it, but I guess I don't have to get it.




Leatherist -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:31:06 PM)

Slender women get an attitude about too much attention, fat ones about not enough-you can't win.

This is why pornography is a billion fold dollar industry.. at least SOMEONE ends up happy!




opposingtwilight -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:31:07 PM)

Because they -do- have a chip on their shoulders about it ...

Which is understandable ... I mean I turned down some guy earlier today and he called me "fatty" even though he outweighs me by 100 lbs. I shouldn't think it would take somoene very long at all to become jaded and cynical around here.




bestbabync -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:31:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Ahhh, there's the problem.  You are expecting people who happen to like kinky sex, or who identify as dominant, etc., to be better than anyone who doesn't.  We are no different, no better and no worse, than the rest of the world.

Reading your OP, you seem to expect men who identify as dominant to be different than men who are not into D/s.  After all, you didn't ask what men think of BBWs, you asked what dominants think, as if that makes a difference.  Men are men, regardless of their sexual inclinations, and they are all going to have their preferences.  Perhaps you didn't mean it this way, but it does sound shallow to ask what dominant men think about it, as opposed to just men.


Cali



i guess it does not matter what i say or mean by my statements here, i am wrong, shallow or have low self esteem.
but i did pose this question to Dominants and not to submissives, right?




opposingtwilight -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:32:27 PM)

Oh don't go there, please. [:'(]

This is a public forum and you will recieve replies from all sides of the spectrum.




bestbabync -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:37:41 PM)

you said it PUBLIC FORUM!

but in several post throughout this topic, i was told that my question was repetitive and had no place or right to be posted again.







CalifChick -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:38:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestbabync

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Ahhh, there's the problem.  You are expecting people who happen to like kinky sex, or who identify as dominant, etc., to be better than anyone who doesn't.  We are no different, no better and no worse, than the rest of the world.

Reading your OP, you seem to expect men who identify as dominant to be different than men who are not into D/s.  After all, you didn't ask what men think of BBWs, you asked what dominants think, as if that makes a difference.  Men are men, regardless of their sexual inclinations, and they are all going to have their preferences.  Perhaps you didn't mean it this way, but it does sound shallow to ask what dominant men think about it, as opposed to just men.


Cali



i guess it does not matter what i say or mean by my statements here, i am wrong, shallow or have low self esteem.
but i did pose this question to Dominants and not to submissives, right?


Why yes, you're absolutely right, so therefore, I must have absolutely nothing of any value to say whatsoever.  Go ahead, discount my opinon based on my sexual and lifestyle preferences, that makes so much sense.



Cali




bestbabync -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:41:20 PM)

oh god!...my opinion and question here was discounted, insulted and made fun of from the very beginning by you and many others.  i understand why alot of people find this site so disagreeable!




NormalOutside -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:42:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestbabync
are there any Doms out there looking to find rt ltr happiness with a very submissive, obedient bbw submissive?
what do Doms think of the bbw submissive?  why do so many not take us serious, think we are gross or use us for temporary satisfaction?

Fat girls aren't attractive to me.  There's a evolutionary biological reason behind that.  I've experimented to a degree (just like I did with bisexuality) and found that I'm not into it.  My eyes don't like fat girls, my arms don't like fat girls, my cock doesn't like fat girls, and various social and other reasons all point me toward girls with a healthy amount of body fat.

Another reason fat girls don't make suitable mates for me is that they very often have self esteem issues resulting from being fat, as well as emotional issues which LED them to being fat.  Not all, but many.  Do I want to get involved in that if I don't have to?  Nope.  Why choose something equal in every way except fat and possibly messed up?

A side rant of my own, not answering your question....... large amounts of fat aren't healthy.  We're disgusting eaters in the Western world and it grosses me out how we treat our bodies and still demand to live to 85 in decent shape.  It's not THAT hard to be healthy, but you have to actually want it.  Anyone who wants it will get it.  "It's a disease" or "I got it from my Dad's side" are false cop-outs.  Take in less calories than you're using in a day ----> weight loss.  True for 99.9% of the population.  So do more moving around and less eating.  If you want to be fat, be fat, that is your right.  You won't be sleeping in my bed, and you probably won't be healthy when you hit 40.




CalifChick -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:45:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bestbabync

oh god!...my opinion and question here was discounted, insulted and made fun of from the very beginning by you and many others.  i understand why alot of people find this site so disagreeable!


No, I did not insult you, I was trying to get you to see the issue from a different perspective.  I was trying to show you that you were putting the emphasis on the wrong thing.  Much like a certain poster who says things like, "Do Dominants Lie?"... I was trying to show you that dominant men are no different than any other man when it comes to many things, including their size preferences.

You can choose to be insulted, or you can choose to see some value in what I said.  Or not.

Cali




KatyLied -> RE: bbw submissives? (8/16/2008 8:50:05 PM)

quote:

but i did pose this question to Dominants and not to submissives, right?


Anyone is free to answer, regardless of where you post.

quote:

really my biggest problem is with the abusive, opinionated and hateful people i have found in this lifestyle.  this lifestyle is full of the unnormal, the deviant, the off the beaten path!  you


honey > vinegar





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