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My first Cuckold experience


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My first Cuckold experience - 7/15/2008 5:31:44 AM   
sfdrew


Posts: 124
Joined: 6/15/2007
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Let me first make an administrative note about this story. I actually met LadyLupine on another site but we reconnected after a seperation on collarme. I am currently Her slave and live in boyfriend. I am also now Her cuckold.

I would like to begin this story by revealing what my feelings were about cuckolding before my experience with it. I had read stories written by other couples who had been practicing cuckolding and I had seen sissy boy cock sucking porn under the veil of 'cuckold' porn. I knew that the basic premise was a marriage where where the husband is monogamous and the wife is promiscuous. The husband is either unable to pleasure his wife or he is too meek to voice his concern. Humiliation is a huge theme in cuckolding and a personal favorite of mine. Sometimes the husband is put into chastity to ensure he is also tormented physically as well as mentally. Often times the husband is forced to enjoy a 'cream pie' consisting of semen sucked from the wifes vagina. Sometimes the husband is even forced to perform sexual favors for the wife and her many lovers. The main tenant however is the mental torture endured by the husband who is forced to watch the woman he loves pleasured by another man, whether or not he is able to himself or not. The wife is allowed to enjoy any man she choses and the husband is forced to endure the savage roller coaster of emotions conjured from watching infidelity.

The mental torture and suffering that comes from watching your mate befriend other mates was put on the back burner in my mind. I was looking forward to the joy of humiliation and voyeurism. I wasn't in the least bit insecure about our relationship and I had certainly seen and done far more kinky activities than cuckolding to consider it any challenge. I knew that she was having sex with other men and I regularly encouraged it. I never took into consideration that I was never present at the time and how that might affect me emotionally. This my friends is a true story about cuckolding and a rare glimpse into the real power of cuckolding: emotion.

I received a phone call during the day in which I was informed that Phil would be arriving at the apartment at about the same time as I was. When I came in the door I could hear them talking in the bedroom. They were on my computer looking at pictures he had taken in Australia. He was a young man and better looking than I had imagined despite how relatively uncaring I was about mens looks. Immediately the situation was different than any of the endlessly fabricated cuckold stories and pornography. This wasn't some big black man who had only stopped by to get laid. He was a young, attractive, and interesting man in much the same way as myself. Phil and I even had some mutual interests. This made the whole situation even more uncomfortable than I could have imagined. She had actually known him and been friends with him longer than me. This man was what I never imagined. He was a perfectly qualified mate. Even though I didn't lose my composure or faith in our relationship I couldn't keep my mind off the fact that he was more than just a fuck buddy.

As the evening went on I began to feel more and more like the guest and less and less like one of the hosts. They sat together on the sofa while I was across the room on the other couch. She kept her feet propped up on his legs the whole evening and he was never shy about massaging them for her. I often saw her stealing gazes at him but never at me. Admittedly I was there all the time and this was a limited engagement. I wasn't bothered by the fact that she was paying more attention to him because I thought he deserved it. This was a special trip and he had come out just to see her. I suppose that is really what made me feel like the guest. The whole evening was about them spending time together and I was only there out of a matter of my inconveniently having no other place to be. My nerves were on high alert the whole evening and even though a stiff breeze of uncomfortable air never left my side I felt a kind of warm embrace from watching them together.

The gravity of the situation had been slowly taking shape throughout the course of the night. I had to be to work early the next morning and the extremely uncomfortable affair of me removing my things from the bedroom in order to retire on the couch was extremely humiliating. As I felt the bedroom door close behind me I could here him say 'Goodnight'. He said it in that short, crisp, and artificially friendly way that people do when they are glad to have relatives out of the house after a long day. I settled in on the couch, moving pillows and blankets around until I was comfortable. Little did I realize that the worst was still to come.

Perhaps the greatest shock to my system came when I heard the music coming from the bedroom. This wasn't just any music. This was OUR music. This was the music that she had always played when we were intimate. I realized at that moment when my heart sank into my chest that there had never been anything special about that music. All the times we had ever been together now seemed a slight bit less important knowing that they were more generic than I had ever considered. I felt as though my heart were breaking and yet somehow I was still happy for the two of them. I was careful not to make to much noise while trying as hard as possible to hear what was being said. All I could make out was 'well he was in Germany' interspersed between some laughing and giggling. At no time had I ever felt less welcome in my own home. I felt as though my mere presence from the other room was putting a damper on their enjoyment.

About this time I felt something I had heard about but never expected would happen to me. I felt jealous. I didn't feel just a wee bit jealous, but a lot jealous. Every tender moment, soft caress, and loving kiss that had ever transpired came flooding back to me and I wanted nothing more in the whole world than to hold her in my arms. My nerves had taken all they could handle for one evening and I eventually cradled myself to sleep.

The whole next day I felt as though I was about to burst out into tears even though I couldn't have shed a drop to save my life. I can only compare the experience to those moments when your think you're about to sneeze but cannot. I think any tears that would have fallen would have been a mix of sorrow and joy. I had finally experienced the beautiful joy of cuckolding first hand. I had taken my first step into a larger world of satisfaction. No amount of physical pain or verbal humiliation could ever hold a candle to joys of emotional domination. As a truly submissive man at heart I know I have found the happiness that filled my dreams as a young boy. I look forward to taking larger steps into cuckolding and emotional domination, and encourage any couple who is truly in love and wants to experience all the wonderful flavors it has to offer to give it a try as well.

< Message edited by sfdrew -- 7/15/2008 5:34:51 AM >
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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/15/2008 5:45:09 AM   
MzMinx


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that was beautifully shared

thank you *smiles*

(in reply to sfdrew)
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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/15/2008 5:56:19 AM   
sfdrew


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Thank You for reading it. I was hopping its length wouldn't turn people off from reading it. It was something I felt I had to write because the experience was so powerful for me.

I do find it amusing that You are from Australia and that is where the man came over was just visiting. I don't run into to many people from Australia.

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/15/2008 6:00:41 AM   
MzMinx


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*laughs *  we are a kinky lot here in australia ... although by world standards there are not that many of us ....  only just over 20 million ...   but we do tend to turn up all over the place

and australia is an amazing place to visit

< Message edited by MzMinx -- 7/15/2008 6:11:13 AM >

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/15/2008 6:52:06 AM   
seababy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMinx

*laughs *  we are a kinky lot here in australia ... although by world standards there are not that many of us ....  only just over 20 million ...   but we do tend to turn up all over the place

and australia is an amazing place to visit


Hey ! I resemble that remark! :)

By the way I love the way you have written this. I certainly didn't find it too long a read. Thank you for sharing your experience.

(in reply to MzMinx)
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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/17/2008 6:17:00 AM   
wandersalone


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uh oh you got the trifecta of Aussies reading your post.  Looking forward to reading more about your experiences.  It was lovely to read it.

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/17/2008 6:25:19 AM   
MzMinx


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*waves to seababy and wandersalone *


Its always nice to hear about the emotional and mental side rather than the activities ..... after all its how we feel and react to things that matters  so much more than  what activitiy we use to get there

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/17/2008 6:29:47 AM   
wandersalone


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smiles hi MzMinx ... yes I agree.  I read the threads about cuckholding over on the Mistresses forum when they appear however I don't think I have read such a well written post on the emotional side of it. For someone who admittedly doesn't quite understand cuckholding this was very informative for me about his experience of it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMinx

*waves to seababy and wandersalone *


Its always nice to hear about the emotional and mental side rather than the activities ..... after all its how we feel and react to things that matters  so much more than  what activitiy we use to get there


_____________________________

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King
Godmother of the subbie mafia
My all time favourite threads
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=2002501
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=790885

(in reply to MzMinx)
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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/17/2008 7:49:03 PM   
LadyLupineNYC


Posts: 617
Joined: 12/14/2006
From: NYC
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As the proud owner of slave takara (aka sfdrew), I can say that he has always been unusually aware and articulate about the emotional impact that D/s and bdsm on him (a long talk we had right after he first read ‘Venus in Furs’ comes to mind on this point).  Having said that, even I was somewhat taken aback by his reactions to another man coming over, esp. one who I know from CM for well-over a year and who I have had both a vanilla and kink relationship with.  I will protest that Phil’s goodnight was not quite as curt as portrayed by takara, but I am sure we can all forgive him this little sin of overwrought reactions.  While I expected some reaction, I was both shocked and intrigued by the depth and character it ended up taking (none of it at all helped by the fact that we were all watching the new Futureama movie which has a *gasp* polyamorus subplot! ).

I am so very happy that you have been enjoying his post; I know that it has meant a lot to him to see other join him in celebrating this new and prized experiance.

Lady Lupine


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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/19/2008 1:40:47 AM   
MzMinx


Posts: 277
Joined: 12/26/2005
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*smiles* Lady Lupine ... I think any representation of an experience is exactly that ... one person interpretatrion of what  happened ... a view of what things seemed important to them at the  tine of writting down the experience .... any experience is coloured by our filters and reactions  rather than absolute truth .... how a word feels is  just as real a how it  actually happened ... and I think its really good to get their honest feeling .... which does not as such say it happened that  way . or was intended to evoke that reaction...

I can tell by your boys words .. that much attention was payed to him and  his needs both  before.  dureing  and after the experience ...  it may just not be attention that others  understand as being good attention
My compliments and best wishes to both of you and all who touch your world

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/19/2008 10:31:27 AM   
hallieB


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oh my... what an emotional experience. I can only imagine what you must of went through. I dont know if I will ever be strong enough to endure such an experience. The more I read through the threads on cm the more I understand that this lifestyle is about alot more than what people on the outside perceive it to be. I understand pushing ones limits just a little more after reading your story. I thank you for sharing your experience and this is something I will remember for a long time to come.....

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/19/2008 11:24:28 AM   
sfdrew


Posts: 124
Joined: 6/15/2007
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I don't think cuckolding is for everybody, but it does make both of U/us very happy. She enjoys playing with my emotions and I enjoy giving power over the most intimate parts of my life to another person. In a strange way I feel more safe and secure knowing that control over my emotions rests in Her hands. She has the power to reduce me tears and also to lift me up to the highest of euphoria. I trust that She will string me up and down the ladder throughout O/our relationship. I think She actually put it best even though I am only paraphrasing.

"You will never know or appreciate the highest high until you have known and appreciated the lowest low"

I am very happy that my experience has been of value to some of the members here. Mistress suggested that I get together a scrapbook of all the experience stories, fantasy stories, and poems I have written. The positive response I have gotten here makes me consider posting it online.


< Message edited by sfdrew -- 7/19/2008 11:27:28 AM >

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/31/2008 3:26:57 AM   
pjinlansing


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Wonderfully written.  I have a fascination with cuckolding and reading your really well written account of your experience was a turn on for me.

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 7/31/2008 10:41:55 PM   
sunshinemiss


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Hello drew,
Wow... I have never before understood this kink.  One of those *shrug... if it makes you happy, then it can't possibly be bad... But after your post, there's a tiny glimmer of sense to it for me.  That is an amazing amount of trust the two of you share.  It is awe inspiring.

peace and passion,
sunshine

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/1/2008 1:06:03 PM   
subeos


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i enjoyed it as well. i have always wondered about this and thank you for taking my into "your" world.
slave eos


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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/1/2008 10:23:43 PM   
slavekal


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Beautiful story.  Milady has made me a willing cuckold as well.  The range of emotions is wide and deep.  You did a great job of relating them, bro.

< Message edited by slavekal -- 8/1/2008 10:24:22 PM >

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/2/2008 12:43:51 PM   
subexploring


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Wow, beautifully written. Thoughtful, and conveyed intense emotions with precision.

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/6/2008 9:27:36 AM   
MsBre


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Lovely post... glad to see a young man venture into this realm of submission.  As you mentioned you thought that the other 'kinky' things you had done in the past would surpass the simplicity (para-phrasing that) but in reality you found it much of a deeper emotional and psychological submission.. which is why it should be practiced more. 
Good luck with your future endeavors!
Ms Bre

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/10/2008 6:49:24 PM   
LookieNoNookie


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Wow!

Whatever it is you do for a living, I sure hope you give some consideration to becoming a writer!

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RE: My first Cuckold experience - 8/10/2008 9:15:48 PM   
MistressPav


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As Paris Hilton would say,

"That was hot."


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"An it harm none, unless they deserve it, do what ye will." --Scorpio Creed

A- Rh-




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