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1). He wants to be humiliated and shown he is inadequate
2). he wants you to recieve pleasure, whereever or however
3). he has voyeristic tendancies

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ORIGINAL: Petruchio

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1). He wants to be humiliated and shown he is inadequate
2). he wants you to recieve pleasure, whereever or however
3). he has voyeristic tendancies

A psychiatrist I know says there's a lot of reasons, but an often overlooked cause is having unrecognized homosexual tendencies. A man may get to watch and possibly touch up close and personal.

Masochism also plays a strong rôle (suprise!) except in cases of a disinterested husband who is too tired or not attracted to women or at least his wife. He may feel another man will take the 'burden of pressure' off his shoulders.

Conversely, some men take pride in their wife as a sex object, and want to show her off. An offshoot of this is familiar to some women in that the husband wants another man to validate his opinion.

The shrink says some are drawn to the drama of the situation, like having their own private soap opera. Sometimes these desires develop in childhood. She described a wannabee culkolder whose mother used to make him watch whilst she fucked and sucked friends of his. (My impression was that they were young, as old as teens, but perhaps younger.)

The short term effects may seem harmless but in the long term, the relationship suffers irreparable harm and disintegrates. According to her, the underlying causes are rooted in an unhealthy psyche or esteem. If you can't walk away from such a man, RUN.

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ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus



Cuckolding involves an essential contempt for the person being cuckolded. Why would I be in a relationship with someone I had no respect for?

There are many facets to humiliation play, and plenty of players to engage in the different aspects. Finding them, and creating satisfactory relationships with them, is the difficulty. I can't imagine what the "rest" of the relationship with someone into cuckolding would be like.

Ms Francine

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"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.

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ORIGINAL: PassionateNights

Wow..i have always found a wide variety of definitions but i thought the idea that the submissive (hey that's me), puts my Dominants pleasure before mine and part of surrendering myself to her is that jealous claim.
Now not to be stereotypical but many women, it seems, are so relationship based that the conection transcends any physical pleasure and the partnership is paramount...hey whatever it's about giving her options....it's about true sacrifice for her...not for your kink...and here is where i confuse even myself since i get tremendous pleasure for seeing her pleasured...BUT this is not for the weak of heart if you can;t surrender this..don't it will kill ya. If you don't have the self worth and selflessness...you'll never survive the ego blow of watching her with another.

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ORIGINAL: siamsa24

I can't imagine being with another

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ORIGINAL: Petruchio

A psychiatrist I know says there's a lot of reasons, but an often overlooked cause is having unrecognized homosexual tendencies. A man may get to watch and possibly touch up close and personal.

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I was once in a complicated relationship that, in retrospect, was clearly bull-wife-cuckold, but at the time I thought it was master-slave-slave's vanilla husband. The slave's vanilla husband became a cuckold when she came home one day and forced him to eat my come out of her vagina. At that point, I became a bull, and didn't realize it. (The cuckold eventually killed himself, but that's a different matter.)

Lam

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The fact that one unstable person killed himself after being forced into a demeaning situation that he was too fragile to handle is not a blanket argument against cuckoldry.

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ORIGINAL: lonewolfe

If I may impose, could I please have get this spelled out for me in detail.

Google turned up a very large definition. Ranging from no sex and sexual contact to oral gential service of the dominate partner with no genital intercourse. To the cockholded person being made to watch the intamacy of the dominate partner with a third part then forced to orally clean the dominate partner.

However I have asked this of those who have listed it in their profile without answer.