MarcusofAr
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Joined: 3/12/2008
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Tal.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Nyxmyst
These citizens you speak of are married and this does not qualify as free companionship within the Gorean way. Why? Marriage contradicts what a Gorean free companionship is on most if not all of the fundamentals."
And which fundamentals would those be?
I would think that whether or not that were true would depend upon the internal workings of the marriage being discussed; despite the fact that the institution of marriage makes all (or most) such relationships equivalent under the law (for the most part, any way-- legalities vary among different jurisdictions), the obvious truth is that, WITHIN the basic legal structure dictated by law in order for one to have a legal marriage, there are as many different variations as can be imagined.
The argument that "since there is no marriage on Gor, no Gorean can be married on Earth and still be Gorean" is equivalent to the similar argument that "since there are no cars on Gor, no Gorean can drive a car on Earth and still be Gorean."
Marriage as it exists in western culture is primarily a legal agreement wherein a pair of people are legally recognized by the state as being in a formal union-- its spiritual or religious connotations are both variable and completely optional. Legal marriage is by any definition a fairly flexible institution. The fact that there is a growing social movement demanding that its parameters be expanded to include homosexual partnerships beneath its aegis is ample proof of that.
Some such unions might be entirely at odds with the particulars of Gorean Philosophy, but they need not be. In fact, most aren't. Within the institution of marriage, many different types of relationship are possible.
In recent posts, you yourself have commented upon the fact that there are some cultural examples of actual slavery in existence, flying under the radar of western society in certain religious and familial groupings; in such cases, often, the married female is (although "legally"married), for all intents and purposes, a slave. Thus, obviously marriage in that context can include slavery, which some might argue is completely anti-Gorean in all aspects, since "a slave cannot hold property" or whatever else.
But the overall legalities often have little to do with what happens WITHIN the relationship, as you yourself have previously implied.
What does Norman have to say about it?
quote:
"There is no marriage, as we know it, on Gor, but there is the institution of the Free Companionship, which is its nearest correspondent."
--Outlaw of Gor
He also tells us:
quote:
"A Gorean free woman does not change her name in the ceremony of the Free Companionship. She remains who she was. In such a ceremony two free individuals have elected to become companions. The Earth woman, as a consequence of certain mating ceremonials, may change her last name. The first and other names, however, tend to remain constant."
--Explorers of Gor
Married women upon Earth are not required to legally change their surnames, though many do, taking the male "gens" surname (as Norman discusses in Magicians of Gor). Most married women on Earth do NOT change their first name, though-- such would be considered by many to be unthinkable. Which it typically would be, to a Free Gorean.
Since many Goreans of low caste have only one given name, attached via a connector to the name of their father (usually with the identifier "ho," meaning "son of," yet such individuals can and do enter into the Free Companionship, the point becomes somewhat moot.
The main factors which identify Gorean Free Companionship seem to be based upon the simple fact that it is a contractual relationship entered into by Free Goreans. Among those of immense wealth or High Caste, a dowry or bride-price is often involved (as it was in the past, in many Earth cultures) but that doesn't seem to be a requirement. Especially in the case of recently-freed slaves, who would have no material property at all:
quote:
"I noted that the girls who had been once their slaves, captured enemies, now wore no longer their collars of gold, but instead stood at their sides as Free Companions."
--Assassin of Gor
Too, though Gorean Free Companionships (like Earth marriages) are sometimes contracted between families, the Gorean Free Companionship can also be entered into freely at the wish of the female involved, as is the case in most modern Western marriages:
quote:
"Surprisingly enough, a woman who is bought from her parents, for tarns or gold, is regarded as a Free Companion, even though she may not have been consulted in the transaction. More commendably, a free woman may herself, of her own free will, agree to be such a companion."
--Outlaw of Gor
Thurnus stood up again. "I ask this free woman," said he, indicating Sandal Thong, "for whom I muchly care, to accept me in free companionship."
There was a great cry of pleasure from the villagers.
"But Thurnus," said she, "as I am now free do I not have the right to refuse?"
"True," said Thurnus puzzled.
"Then, noble Thurnus," said she, evenly, calmly, "I do refuse. I will not be your companion."
--Slave Girl of Gor
"Drink with me the cup of the Free Companionship," said Relius, rather sternly.
"Yes, Master," said Virginia, "yes!"
"Relius," said he.
"I love you!" she cried. "I love you, Relius!"
"Bring the wine of Free Companionship!" decreed Marlenus.
The wine was brought and Relius and Virginia, lost in one another’s eyes, arms interlocked, drank together.
--Assassin of Gor
Free Companionship is formally celebrated by having the two parties interlink their arms to drink wine, as is often done in Western Earth marriages. There are many various rituals involved with the wearing of, and ritual lifting of, veils worn by the female (as also exist in marriage ceremonies on Earth); and the companioned females often wear flowers in their hair, again as it is often done in Earth marriage ceremonies:
quote:
In certain cities, in connection with the free companionship, the betrothed or pledged beauty may wear eight veils, several of which are ritualistically removed during various phases of the ceremony of companionship; the final veils, and robes, of course, are removed in private by the male who, following their removal, arms interlocked with the girl, drinks with her the wine of the companionship, after which he completes the ceremony. This sort of thing, however, varies considerably from city to city. In some cities the girl is unveiled, though not disrobed, of course, during the public ceremony. The friends of the male may then express their pleasure and joy in her beauty, and their celebration of the good fortune of their friend.
--Slave Girl of Gor
A crown of talenders was often worn by the girl at the feast celebrating her Free Companionship.
--Outlaw of Gor
Gorean Free Companionship seems to require only the following: that the two parties who enter into it are legally free, that they interlink their arms and drink wine at the companionship ceremony, that they formally agree to repeat that action every year on their anniversary and decide at that time whether or not to continue the relationship or end it, and that during the course of that relationship both parties remain free-- legal enslavement ends the companionship immediately.
Marriage isn't always like that on Earth-- but it can be. And if it is, I see no reason why an Earth marriage can't be functionally and practically identical to a Gorean Free Companionship. After all, the particulars of an Earth marriage are mostly dependent upon the wishes of the married parties. Though technically, it might be more accurate to say that a Gorean Free Companionship can exist WITHIN a legal marriage, according to the philosophical wishes of those involved.
Further, if one doesn't live in a joint-property state (in the U.S, anyway) then the two parties maintain ownership of all of their property individually. Though one might want to look into that, if one were considering entering into a Gorean Free companionship within a marriage.
Frankly, Norman uses the Gorean Free Companionship as an analogy for Earth marriage so often in the Gor books that it is pretty obvious that the two relationships bear striking similarity. The greatest departure between the two being the fact that a Free Companionship lapses if not renewed, whereas a marriage does not. Unless those involved decides that it does.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Nyxmyst
“The external is not necessary. Ownership, when accepted and recognized, is an internal dynamic.”
“The external often IS necessary, obviously.”
Which one?
The external IS often a necessary requirement.
If a woman is naturally a slave, but falls under the command of a weak master, and decides that she is therefore NOT a slave... is that not an example of the missing "external" component (in that case, an excellent Mastery)?
If she decides that she must be a Free Woman, therefore... but later meets an excellent Master and realizes that she was mistaken-- and that she IS actually a natural slave, but could only learn it at the feet of masterful male-- is that not equally an example of the necessary external component completing her internal process?
Gorean M/s is about the relationship between the Master and the slave. Without the presence and input of the other, each is an incomplete part of the equation. One cannot be a slave to oneself-- the impetus comes from the relationship, and the relationship must come from somewhere outside of herself.
IWYW
_Marcus_
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RE: Oaths and Professions: Gorean Men Only, Please - 
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