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Anger - 1/2/2010 1:53:11 PM   
Maahsatti


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Greetings to the Free
slaves and other assorted folks,

While this subject I am going to attempt to learn from is originally steeped in religious backgrounds, I do not wish it to become a topic for religion.

I would like to look more into it from the point of view of the Gorean mentality and frame work.
I am aware that anger is considered one of the deadly sins, but as I said, not the direction I want to take.

I would like to know whether people feel anger to be a necessary tool of the human emotion in order for survival or if in fact anger can lead to a destruction of our humanity, leading to selfishness, dishonor and even death.

Spartans for example, being considered one of the deadliest forces of their time, brutal and unyielding in war, actually did not enter into warfare in or with anger.
Before each battle, the commanders would even summon musicians to play serene calm music in order to relax them before battle, rather then taking an approach of pumping up mentally so to speak, I mean, instead of building their hate and anger towards the enemy in order to stir an adrenalin rage, they calmed themselves, knowing that anger would put them off balance and cause them to lose focus.

This information actually surprised me to find out, but once pondering on it, I realized and understood it's logic.

I am wondering how Gorean men feel in this day and age, whether or not they feel anger is useful or destructive to them and if they feel they can control and use anger to their benefit, or if ultimately it could and would bring about their destruction, not only in a physical sense but in an emotional or mental and even in an honorable sense.

Are men more subject to the effects of anger over women? or are women just as subject to it's usefulness or it's destruction?

In ancient times, they said anger was caused by demonic influences and the cure was exorcism.
Today, scientists have discovered a part of the brain they call area 25. A very small part of the brain they describe as a sort of engine to the drive of anger, but they have also found that our frontal lobes of the brain act as a sort of break to that engine and enable us to apply reason.

It has been said that a person can become temporarily insane with anger/rage thus a claim of not being responsible for their actions during that time frame.

I wonder if that is not just an easy excuse or even a way to deceive in order to not be held accountable.

I am sure we have all witnessed the truly astonishing events in todays society and the fact that these events are being commited by younger and younger perpatraitors. Our youth seem to lack any control when they become angry and I wonder if that is a ligitimate effect from the brain's responses or if it is a direct result of societies complacency and lack of discipline.

I feel Gorean men more so then other men, for the most part, have a stronger ability to know how and to utilize  sane reason over sheer brute force instigated by anger.

I realize however, Gorean or not, men are human and subject to the weaknesses of the flesh and mind, but just *how* subject are they/we to that weakness?

I look forward to your views and opinions.

I wish all well,
Maahsatti


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Gorean women, whether slave or Free,know, that their simple presence, brings joy to men,and I cannot think but that this pleases them.
Outlaw of Gor, pg 54
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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 5:25:47 PM   
AnnaOfAramis


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Greetings Mistress Maah,

This is such an interesting post. This girl believes that anger is generally a loss of control. Often when one sees something like martial arts or boxing, or a fight in the movies an opponent will purposely try to make the other one angry because they know he won't think clearly and that he might do something stupid and give them an advantage. It seems to this girl that anger generally leads to loss of honor and destruction. She does not know whether it is necessary for survival and would be interested in others' take on that. There is also perhaps a difference between "righteous anger"- that is a controlled anger... like if someone was angry that someone was taken advantage of, yet remained in control and decided to go and deal with it in a rational manner.

As regards youth... this girl thinks that many of today's youth for some reason lack self-control and tend to be self-centered and rather geared for instant gratification. Perhaps it is this inability to go without and show restraint... combined with the attitude that "anything goes" and any behavior is acceptable in regards to manners... so that they feel they can say what they like when they like how they like which also contributes to a lack of restraint. When this girl was a child, adults could still correct any child on the street and children would obey and other adults didn't mind if you told their child off. Nowadays this has changed.

Well wishes,
anna



_____________________________

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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 5:53:29 PM   
Malkinius


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Greetings anna....

I am going to disagree with you. Anger is not a loss of control. Anger can lead to a loss of control. What it really is, to my understanding, is a focusing on some thing. A type of mental tunnel vision where something blocks out whatever is not being focused on. It is also a spectrum. There are levels of anger. This is why some people and some laws allow for a temporary insanity defense due to extreme anger and provocation. The person is so focused on whatever that their normal self controls have been lost due to the urge to do something about or to whatever caused the anger.

Re the original post and yours about having fighters stay calm before and during a fight. That is absolutely true. Anger and extreme focusing causes people to not see things that are not in their tunnel and thus are easier to defeat. Anger also often causes people to forget their training and devolve to instinctive lashing out to strike someone. That usually doesn't work as well as a planned strike.

Be well....

Malkinius


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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 7:12:22 PM   
Saffleur


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Tal Maahsatti,


quote:

ORIGINAL: Maahsatti
I am wondering how Gorean men feel in this day and age, whether or not they feel anger is useful or destructive to them and if they feel they can control and use anger to their benefit, or if ultimately it could and would bring about their destruction, not only in a physical sense but in an emotional or mental and even in an honorable sense.


I agree with Malkinius, anger comes in a bevy of ways. The spectrum of anger can definitely bring about destruction to an individual both mentally, emotionally, physicall and cause a lapse in honor.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maahsatti
Are men more subject to the effects of anger over women? or are women just as subject to it's usefulness or it's destruction?


There is a reason why the saying "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" -winks-

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maahsatti
I realize however, Gorean or not, men are human and subject to the weaknesses of the flesh and mind, but just *how* subject are they/we to that weakness?


Goreans on the whole should be in touch with their emotions in a deep sense. It is not like the day to day emotions that most feel. The difference for the Gorean man is that he strives to control those emotions instead of allowing them to run rampant. In doing so he becomes the rock in the storm. By allowing himself to become overly angry he becomes blinded and thinks with a clouded mind. A good reason the Spartans would calm their soldiers before battle. It is why the phalanx worked so well!

Going with what Anna said, the society we live in today is definitely all about instant gratification. Look at the kids who go absolutely bonkers when their XBox account gets canceled or the children who have cops called on them because they've done something awful over petty matters. If we don't teach our children things like patience and control of self then we are on the fast lane for a more violent society over petty matters.

Anger can be a tool, it doesn't have to be a detriment. The ability to portray anger in order to get a person to reveal things they normally wouldn't is an example. To act scorned and seething with anger when your core is quite the opposite allows you to glean information you may not obtain otherwise. Too, the idea of a man becoming angry serves as leash for the slave. Whether he really would or not is moot. The fact that she withholds from doing something wrong that ends up being trivial because of his anger is what matters.

Some may say doing such things is like playing mind games. I don't believe it is. Slavery is a mental, physical, and emotional binding. If he does not control all those things he doesn't own her.

There are people who use the "Crime of Passion" to get off on things they do. I don't agree with it but that is because I rarely get angry to the point that my judgement gets clouded. Most times I for amusement use that possible anger to get someones goad. C'est La Vie.

I wish You well,
Scott


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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 8:17:04 PM   
AnnaOfAramis


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Greetings Master Malkinius,

Thank you for pointing out that subtlety- that anger can lead to loss of control more as a catalyst but that it need not be loss of control in and of itself. Actually, this girl was thinking after her post that sometimes one needs to release anger as a vent too, because otherwise things build up and can become unhealthy. She supposes that perhaps it is more a matter of what one chooses to do with that anger and whether one is controlled by it or controls it. Tunnel vision is an interesting way of describing it and going back to Mistress Maah's post wherein she mentioned being calm before battle rather than pumping up adrenaline, this also reminds this girl of when she was still performing... after company warm-up there would be some who would gather onstage to "pump-up" and this girl always felt she already had far too much adrenaline as it was and would stay quietly alone in the dressing room needing the calm to focus... too much adrenaline can be distracting. Tunnel vision can be both a benefit and a hindrance- a double edged sword. On stage, one focuses only on the music and the steps and forgets one's life, the audience, everything and she imagines a fighter may likewise tune out distractions. But tunnel vision can also cause one to not see peripheral events and not respond to them, causing, as you gave the example of, a fighter to make a mistake and forget his training because his vision becomes so narrow. Thank you for sharing your perspective Master Malkinius and helping this girl see more of the picture- this girl thinks she will be pondering this now for a while :)

Well wishes,
anna

_____________________________

“I refuse to be the leader. I want a man ... always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot."~Anaiis Nin

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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 8:41:08 PM   
Musicmystery


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Hi Babs,

Anger is a natural, normal emotion. Like all emotions, it's what you do with it. Does love weaken us? Depends on how it's handled. Does fear weaken us? Depends on how it's handled. Does anger weaken us? Depends on how it's handled. Any emotion can leave us out of control. That doesn't mean we don't want to have emotions--we do, and we should, enjoy the gamut of the emotional spectrum. But we should also be in control of those emotions--not in a suppression type of way, but in a balance. Anger can blind, anger can focus, just as other emotions. And all emotions are an important part of our nature.

In terms of survival, the order of nature, the Gorean context I think you're asking about, I think "fierceness" would be a better choice than "anger." When foxes were first bred for friendliness, the docile foxes also lost their straight tails (now curvy), their pointed ears (now floppy), and their dense bone structure (now smaller diameter), among other unintended traits--in short, the traits that help a wild fox survive were connected, researchers later found, to the same gene as the one for fierceness, an important trait for a wild fox's survival. This is not, however, the same as anger, at all. Two year olds are capable of anger. It's not an honorable trait per se.

On the other hand, I can think of many circumstances where anger would be quite appropriate and even add the extra adrenaline to boost fierce action. However, if it clouds judgment, it could be a mistake. I would prefer to keep my anger in check, acting decisively. I can also think of times when anger at myself or at a situation pushed me to take positive action that changed those situations for the better.

I hope that helps.

Live well,

Tim



< Message edited by Musicmystery -- 1/2/2010 9:07:02 PM >


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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 10:07:47 PM   
Maahsatti


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Hi Tim,

Thank you for your response. what you had to say was a lot of my own thoughts on the subject as well. I know anger is natural and just as much a part of us as love fear, pride, etc.

However, while other emotions can cause a destructive path as well, It is said that anger can lead to the worst kind of situations when not handled well and kept in check.

I also agree that anger when controlled is a great motivator and instrument of focus, but are we all as a race subject to losing that control if our anger is pushed beyond certain limits OR do we in fact as scientists suggest have the ability via our own brain specifically the frontal lobe to be able to put the brakes on entering into an out of control anger aka rage.

I have never cared for excuses and it seems to me that claiming temporary insanity on only the basis of anger is a cop out an excuse. I feel a person would need to have something else going on like a deficiency of some sort that causes a short in the fuse, so to speak.
I seen one example of a man killing his mother when he as an adult lived with her in her home and their relationship became burdened and toxic due to the sons mental state. Doctors found out after, that he indeed suffered from his frontal lobes not being fully developed or missing portions, thus he was considered innocent of his crime and sent to a hospital to recieve medical treatment.

Anyways, your views have indeed been helpful to me, as well as the views and the opinions the others who have posted and I thank you again.

Take care,
Babs


_____________________________

Gorean women, whether slave or Free,know, that their simple presence, brings joy to men,and I cannot think but that this pleases them.
Outlaw of Gor, pg 54

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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 10:51:59 PM   
Nephilim


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Anger can refer to many things but as a general emotion, it is still necessary to function well in society.  Anger is an emotional reaction and is much quicker than logical reasoning.  It is important in some situations that we respond immediately, such as if attacked.  If untrained and unprepared, a person who is attacked physically who responds immediately with anger will deter the attack and increase their chances of a positive outcome.  Many people take advantage of the fact that our society has encouraged men to not react emotionally to an aggressor rather than responding in kind.  I think this would go along with the complaints that JN has with our feminized society.  So, to embrace those emotions that make us human and men shouldn't make us ashamed, but we should instead respect them and use them to our advantage.  Some things are strongly instinctual, like "self defense" and we should hone what we are given, not seek to disable it.

Another type of anger that has been mentioned is that used in training.  Reasoning can only bring people so far in understanding each other and controlling behaviors but some things must be learned through operant conditioning.  Conditioning takes advantage of our emotions to create bahaviors.  Conditioning can create behaviors on an unconscious level.   Training can be performed with only reward and disapproval, but once those methods are exhausted, the perception of anger can evoke a primitve response to concede to authority.  A step beyond and sometimes before that would be "corporal punishment", but since that is not an option in all training, it seems we should employ any tactics that are effective.

 

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RE: Anger - 1/2/2010 11:18:22 PM   
Maahsatti


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quote:

Another type of anger that has been mentioned is that used in training. Reasoning can only bring people so far in understanding each other and controlling behaviors but some things must be learned through operant conditioning. Conditioning takes advantage of our emotions to create bahaviors. Conditioning can create behaviors on an unconscious level. Training can be performed with only reward and disapproval, but once those methods are exhausted, the perception of anger can evoke a primitve response to concede to authority. A step beyond and sometimes before that would be "corporal punishment", but since that is not an option in all training, it seems we should employ any tactics that are effective.


    Greetings Nephilim,
Actually, the marine Corp training utilizes the conditioning method, however, like the Spartans they do not encourage anger as their motivation.

By using a harsh, strict environment they condition the soldiers in such a way to prepare them for likely situations they will end up facing.
They train them to focus, by remaining calm and determined.

quote:


It is important in some situations that we respond immediately, such as if attacked.  If untrained and unprepared, a person who is attacked physically who responds immediately with anger will deter the attack and increase their chances of a positive outcome.



I disagree with this, I think that when a regular person who has no training in self defense reacts with quickness, it is more from the fight or flight reaction and not anger.
I mean, most times when a person is attacked or mugged on the streets it happens so fast and is quite a shock, therefor anger I feel does not even have enough time to develope, only the natural response of fight or flight from fear.
I think if a person were to in fact let anger take over it would most likely get him killed as they would not have the ability to quickly react in the most life saving way but instead become even more confused over the whole situation.

Just my opinion though, thank you for sharing your opinions.

I wish you well,
Maahsatti





_____________________________

Gorean women, whether slave or Free,know, that their simple presence, brings joy to men,and I cannot think but that this pleases them.
Outlaw of Gor, pg 54

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 12:55:31 AM   
Maahsatti


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quote:

Goreans on the whole should be in touch with their emotions in a deep sense. It is not like the day to day emotions that most feel. The difference for the Gorean man is that he strives to control those emotions instead of allowing them to run rampant. In doing so he becomes the rock in the storm. By allowing himself to become overly angry he becomes blinded and thinks with a clouded mind. A good reason the Spartans would calm their soldiers before battle. It is why the phalanx worked so well!


   Hi there Saff,
Thank you for sharing your opinions.
I agree whole heartedly with you and why I had stated that in my opinion that Gorean men over other men are capable of much more control over their anger and know how to focus it in a more constructive and useful manner.
Of course I am not saying that *only* Gorean men are capable of this and of course not *all* men who are Gorean are capable either...lol...after all, men no matter how they choose to live their life are human beings and each is an individual.  The same applying to women as well.

Take care,
Maah

< Message edited by Maahsatti -- 1/3/2010 12:57:23 AM >


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Gorean women, whether slave or Free,know, that their simple presence, brings joy to men,and I cannot think but that this pleases them.
Outlaw of Gor, pg 54

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 8:41:24 AM   
Nephilim


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I don't think I was clear when I was talking about anger in training, I didn't mean to imply that you should train someone to be angry for self defense.  Anger in training that I was referring to is a presentation by the trainer.  Expressing disappointment is another emotion that can be instructive, but severity of the situation can make anger a useful tool.  We all naturally do it, if we want someone to reason through something they did wrong, we may express disappointment.  If they do something that may endanger themselves or others or do something that is completely unacceptable, we may snap at someone and express anger.  The person that caused the anger usually immediately responds.  Another place I have personally used it with training is in defining submission.  If there is a conflict of opinion, first you rationalize, then stand firm.  If the other person tries to have you agree by being more assertive, you show disapproval.  If they continue to disagree, they escalate the confrontation to presentation of anger.  From there the situation can escalate to displays of dominance and one person will either submit or leave.  Seems very animalistic and natural to me, just as you would see with other pack/social animals. (of course that scenario leaves out many options, such as bargaining and compromise, just meant to clarify what I mean by saying anger can be useful)

My point in anger being useful when attacked is part of what you said.  Some people react by being "shocked" or even submissive and you are right depending on the situation it can also be dangerous.  The majority of times I have seen someone attacked, it is at a bar, school or other social situation where the attacker was attempting to show some type of dominance.  In those situations, it is always preferable to display anger and stand your ground.  In reality, very few of the conflicts we are ever involved in result in death.  I think the ideal is that you have some conditioned response to each situation.  JN's view of earth is shaped by an academic northern perspective.  I doubt he would have complained much about male restraint if he were a biker in the south (I say south, because I am not familiar with them elsewhere).  Oh, and in a real fight, I'll bet on the untrained instinctual "scrappy" one over the prepared calm mind any day.

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 8:58:29 AM   
OrionTheWolf


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You would lose that bet more times than not.

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 9:54:12 AM   
Falaria


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I would have to agree with Orion on that one.  My Grandfather was a professional boxer, a lightweight champion in his day, and he use to tell me that no matter how trained or disciplined one is, if you can get them really angry to where they see red (yes, that is exactly the phrase he used) than you have won the fight.  He told me this is why a good boxer, and I would have to assume in any battle as well including other sports, studies and learns their opponent, learn their strengths as well as their weaknesses and you form your strategy and attack based on that knowledge. 

I wish you well,
Falaria


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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 10:36:51 AM   
Nephilim


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I don't see a professional boxer as a counter example since I specifically said, untrained versus someone only training their mind against anger, not conditioning themselves or learning to fight.  It should be obvious that someone trained to fight, will, in many cases best someone who is simply a hot-head (not always).  Not to mention that boxing is sporting, not fighting (at least not usually).  If you wish to bet on a pacifist over somone who gets angry in a fight, a fool and his money are soon parted.  Also, I really doubt you seek to anger your opponent (which can sharpen their focus and determination), what you May seek to do is frustrate the opponent until their anger is uncontrollable and it becomes rage.  Which is also a very dangerous thing to do in a fight (or sport), an enraged opponent may become too agressive and overcommit himself leaving himself open (good for you), or he might become more aggressive and actually land the punch and knock you out at all costs (bad).  Anger and rage are two very seperate things. 

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 2:39:32 PM   
mnottertail


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well, anger......that word is either too exclusive or too inclusive......I am too pissed off to discern it.

Righteous indignation ... somebody is going to see the nuance of that, not that it is the only one.

Hup

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 2:40:23 PM   
OrionTheWolf


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You have clarified yourself better now, so it makes more since. If both are untrained, then the person with anger and passion may indeed win more often. That was not clear in your other post. Anger only sharpens their focus in one area, often causing them to have decreased perception, this is a scientific fact, just look it up. A correction is that rage is one of three states of anger, it is uncontrollable anger. There are several good books on human behavior that talks about the three states of anger, and how anger is actually exhibited to warn aggressors to stay away, and sometimes does work. Anger also causes certain physiological conditions in the body that temporarily reduces IQ. While angry there is body language that is also broadcasting very loudly, making it much easier to see when an individual is going to attack, and in what way that attack may come.

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RE: Anger - 1/3/2010 3:54:25 PM   
Phoenixpower


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery Hi Does anger weaken us? Depends on how it's handled. Any emotion can leave us out of control. That doesn't mean we don't want to have emotions--we do, and we should, enjoy the gamut of the emotional spectrum. But we should also be in control of those emotions--not in a suppression type of way, but in a balance. Anger can blind, anger can focus, just as other emotions.
My apologies for only knowing parts of this thread as I didn't read all of it yet, however that quote above led me to want to raise awareness, that in some conditions anger can lead to pain. If i am angry or arguing intensively with someone...I am likely that I will have to pay for it with ending up in pain. Thats part of fibromyalgia,that emotional distress leads to pain. Two years ago, just before I was diagnosed, I had an intense argument with a train ticket controller as my ticket was only valid for part of my journey, which I didn't know at that time with their zones system. That he was right didn't annoy me, however his attitude and many attempts to accuse me of lieing to him with indirect comments did annoy me and about half an hour later I had to leave uni as the pain became unbearable. Knowing now my diagnosis I observed how it tingles under my skin and in my head when I get too emotionally involved within a situation which I think has to do with the chemicals the brain sets free in that situation. And since then I followed even more my submissive nature and think twice if it is worth to argue or not...as at the end of the day I have no interest to end up in agony because of arguing about something which is not worth it to argue about it and better to just shrug it off instead (or just do as I'm told ;o). So my apologies if my input might not make sense to this topic (isn't that easy to read the threads via mobile phone at work) but just wanted to point out that for some of us being angry itself is likely to lead to huge pain, particular in our muscles, so anger can actually be named as doing selfharm to some people, so to speak. I wish you well

< Message edited by Phoenixpower -- 1/3/2010 4:26:32 PM >


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RE: Anger - 1/5/2010 7:14:22 AM   
nephandi


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Greetings

When I was a young girl a man tricked me into a secluded spot and tried to feel me up, what more he might have wanted to do I do not know. I got out of the situation with putting anger and fear aside so I could think tactically. I managed to get away and flee. I could not have done that if I had let anger over take me.

Another time a man tried to assault me. He stood head and shoulder over me and I could never have won against him in a fight. I forced myself not to get angry, I tore my wrist out of his grip with a trick I have learned from Martial Arts and looked the man right in the eyes. I was not angry but I let him know I would not go quietly. If he continued his assault he would win, but he would shed blood. The man staggered back and hurried away from me. If I had gotten angry I do not know what would have happened.

Anger can cloud the mind and make you act on emotion when you should act with your mind and think. On the other hand, there have been times when I have been close to giving up when only anger have given me the drive to continue. Now those who are soldiers who have been in allot of life and death situations would know this far better than me. But for me, when I have gotten in fights, anger is a useful tool, but if one do not keep reins on it then it can take you down just as quickly as an opponent can.

I wish you well


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(in reply to Maahsatti)
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RE: Anger - 1/5/2010 11:17:42 PM   
blacksword404


Posts: 1552
Joined: 1/4/2008
Status: offline
Greeting Maahsatti,

Anger is a part of life. It can be very useful and at other times destructive. To me there is such a thing as righteous anger. Anger for a legitimate purpose. A legitimate wrong. If someone just walks up and stomps your toe, I would say you would be justified in being angry.

There is what I call hot anger and cold anger. Hot anger being one that rises quickly burns hot and usually leaves just as quick. This kind is usually destructive. It's not easy to harness this kind of anger for a good purpose. Then there is cold anger. The kind that burns cooler and slower.

When most people are hot they are visibly mad, on the verge of exploding and are usually not thinking. Just moving on emotion. When you get someone hot they usually perform worse because the emotions are flaring and the brain is not able to focus like they normally do. In this situation you have knocked them of their game.

And with cold its usually the opposite. You are more focused, but you can control it. Thats the way I look at it. Anger can be useful but like everything else you can't let it control you or consume you.

Rilassarsi
Blacksword

_____________________________

Don't fight him. Embrace your inner asshole.

Tu fellas magnus penum meum...iterum

Genuine catnip/kryptonite.
Ego sum erus.

The capacity to learn is a gift, the ability to learn a skill, the willingness to learn a choice. Dune HH

(in reply to Maahsatti)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Anger - 1/6/2010 7:14:22 PM   
Maahsatti


Posts: 2579
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline
Hi Blacksword,

Very well stated. It helped to take a step back and truly look at the issue with a much broader understanding of the emotion.

Everyon's post in fact helped me to do so.

I wish you and all well,
Maahsatti


_____________________________

Gorean women, whether slave or Free,know, that their simple presence, brings joy to men,and I cannot think but that this pleases them.
Outlaw of Gor, pg 54

(in reply to blacksword404)
Profile   Post #: 20
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