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A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 1:56:26 PM

GoddessLiliane

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I have a certain submissive that enjoys his time with Me.
However, he is not at all into the stereotypical Domme look. Corsets, thigh-high boots, etc. do not at appeal to him. He prefers the vanilla look, which is fine with Me, I don't give much preference either way seeing as I dress vanilla usually.

This will be a problem with gift-shopping though. He has offered to take Me shopping, however, and I am unsure how he will enjoy vanilla shopping.

The question for anyone with any experience with this (vanilla subs spoiling Dommes) are as follows:

How do vanilla shopping sprees usually work?
What sort of stores do vanilla subs enjoy spending at?
What kind of things to subs enjoy gifting?

My current idea is that he'd get me a Juicy Couture charm bracelet and each week, add a charm. Is that unheard of? I would ask for the charm necklace but it's too close to collaring for comfort.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 4:12:44 PM

CaringandReal

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Interesting question, Goddess Liliane! I would suggest an upscale shopping mall with a lot of nice stores in it, then just casually browse around, going into those that appeal to you, trying on stuff (only if you feel like it) or looking at the wares, and when you find something you like, ordering him to buy it for you. Don't worry about him enjoying it or not. He should be enjoying any time serving you if he is a good worshiping submissive, shouldn't he? I would certainly enjoy tagging behind a dominant in a shopping mall, holding their purchases, and paying for the things they decided to buy. It would be blissful, almost. :)

The charm bracelet idea is a very nice one, but if you do that then you both may miss out on the experience of going shopping together, with him as your servant, which could be quite fun. :)

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 5:13:33 PM

liks2plzlf

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I have done this for vanilla girlfriends. Hate shopping but like to please.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 7:42:58 PM

twistedwillow

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~FR

I think you are over thinking the situation Liliane.

Going shopping in the shops of your choosing and simply ordering him to pay for the items you have picked out, and then walking off leaving him to carry
all the bags is quite a "dominant" thing to do, particularly in terms of what you are describing whereby he serves you by taking you shopping.

He is yours, and you simply expect it to happen that he will A pay, B carry, C hold doors, D wait on you when having a coffee break etc.

twisted

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 9:02:08 PM

Wheldrake

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I've never actually done a shopping spree but I have some experience with buying gifts for dominant women, sometimes at my own initiative and sometimes following orders to purchase a specific item. For me this is most rewarding when I know that I'm providing the woman with something she really wants and/or needs - the satisfaction comes from pleasing her. If you think your submissive is like this, then just shop at your own pace and have him buy whatever things appeal to you most. No need to limit yourself to clothing, either. If there's a book you really want to read, or if you need a new alarm clock or webcam or whatever, why not have him buy it for you? If he's wired the way I am, his pleasure in the experience will come from meeting your authentic needs, however offbeat or unexciting they might seem.

If you don't think this approach would work for him (and you, more importantly), another possibility would be to make the shopping trip more titillating by going after things that are on the intimate side - underwear, BDSM toys, even toiletries. You could tease him a little by instructing him to imagine you using or wearing each item he purchases.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/9/2011 11:40:26 PM

phoenixmoonn13

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we go shopping a lot living together it tends to happen. he opens doors i carry bags unless too heavy or too many. he pays or i pay its shared. i dont call him master in public. the dynamic stays .

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/10/2011 5:05:57 AM

DesFIP

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Being the dominant, it is your responsibility to make sure he doesn't overspend on you. Make sure he can afford all these expensive things you're planning to soak him for.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/10/2011 5:27:55 AM

XXMystiqueXX

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I agree w/ DesFIP.......

It is far too easy, especially in today's economy, to overspend. Given that fact and how eager to please most subs are, it would be just far too easy to allow him to buy more than his budget can afford. My suggestion would be to come up with an item or two you really need or desire and take him to look at those with you. No doubt he would be thrilled to buy more than one or two items, but again, subs I have met tend to go way overboard in trying to please and when it comes to spending their money on extravagant gifts, well that honestly makes Me feel uncomfortable. In the past things I have gotten that really thrilled Me were, as I call them, "gifts of time"..........tickets to a special play I wanted to see, a night out at a couple of dinner theaters I could not afford to get tickets for, and best of all was a coupon hand made for Me giving Me "One weekend, place of your choice, Just Ma'am and i". We went to the beach, spent a glorious three days together. And I made sure I had the leash very tight on his spending. :) It simply doesn't have to be about money spent on One.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/10/2011 9:33:26 AM

petmonkey

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessLiliane
My current idea is that he'd get me a Juicy Couture charm bracelet and each week, add a charm.

i love this idea. It shows a kind of commitment (albeit a small-ish one) for both parties. Charms can be chosen to represent specific events within the relationship, making it a very special, prized piece of jewelry. i would feel honored every time i saw it on their wrist. It could be used as a reminder of how heavily we were to display our respective roles (for example, if she wasn't wearing it at the office dinner party, for instance, it'd be a visual reminder not to call her Mistress in front of the other guests or expect overt displays of power).

While, yes, the necklace does at first blush seem similar to a collar, i'm also reminded of the sacred jewelry of Mythological Goddesses--seen from that context, it could indeed have very powerful symbolism for both you and your submissive.

"With each new charm added, the Goddess has greater power over me." <----that kind of thinking, for one.

i've "gone shopping" at malls with people in the past, they haven't all been Dominants, sometimes it was just a friend i was treating for their birthday, or a friend who was in the dumps about something or another and i knew enjoyed "mall therapy" (which personally i

doing with others, but it wasn't about me).

i spent time purchasing small little trinkets for people in each store (or specific stores) we wandered into--something they requested i purchased, something i recalled them saying they wanted in the past that we ran across, something that was related to a new interest, or simply something they lingered over, picked up, returned to, clearly showed interest in, etc. [This can be a fun "game": how close is the submissive paying attention to what the Dominant is doing? Can they pick up on the "ques" the Dominant is giving?]

There was an overall spending limit as well as a spending limit per store (defined by me in the case of friends, negotiated/agreed upon/ made clear in the case of Dominants).

Possibly the best shopping experience i had was with a Dominant at a hardware store. She was in need of repair items for her home, but didn't know specifics about the products needed. i got to show off my knowledge, feel valued for it, she got to grill me with questions, had a personal assistant/personal shopper recommending (and purchasing) the best quality & correct items (but not making the final decisions, of course). And afterward, i got to play plumber and she got the most fabulous new bathroom fixtures she hadn't completely realized how much she wanted.

In the case of the example above, i suppose the question is: What is the sub an "expert" on and what do you need or want? Perhaps they have a good knowledge of area rugs or cookware or furniture or digital equipment or new music or awesome import stores or sporting equipment or car parts or interesting books or tea or hosiery . . .well, you get the idea, i'm sure.

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RE: A certain submissive and gifts - 1/10/2011 6:51:04 PM

LPslittleclip

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i love shopping any shopping at all. going shopping with my Mistress is a great treat. i assist in any way that i can helping find a paticular size or style of underwear holding the items up for Her veiwing. or simply being attentive to Her. as the Dominant you set the limit on what is spent on you. also it may help to build it up for a while before the trip by talking it up mentioning it discussing the shops that might be visited ect.

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