Collarchat.com

Create a
Free Account
As the Collar Turns:
Collarchat.com - BDSM Forum

Home  Login  Search 
Espanol  Deutsch  Francais  Italiano  Portugues 

Visiting a dominatrix for the first time


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Visiting a dominatrix for the first time Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 4:17:59 AM   
JamesHarvey711


Posts: 7
Joined: 4/25/2011
Status: offline
Hi, just looking for some advice.

I have booked in to see a professional dominatrix. I have had submissive tendencies for over 12 years and have dabbled online. I've been pushed quite hard online via cam, well as far as one can be using this method.

However I have no RT experience, I thought the best way to see if this is for me would be to see a professional dominatrix. So I'm just looking for any advice of any kind before I have my first RT encounter!?

I'm also slightly concerned after my first taste of RT I will become addicted to this which probably isn't a good idea, would be expensive and would anther have RT experiences with like minded people.

Well any advice or first RT experiences would be great. I'm nervous and excited, thanks in advance

James
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 4:34:55 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 8307
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
Tell her it's your first experience and also tell her what you want to explore.

Just try it out and see it as an experience, if you should like it in real life, you can always get involved in your local BDSM community and try to find a partner.

Now in case you get "cold feet" and don't want to go through it, be respectful enough to call her and cancel.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to JamesHarvey711)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 8:13:08 AM   
Muttling


Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline
My first experience in this was also with a pro domme, it was about 20 years ago but I still remember it well and it was a very good experience for me.   It helped me to answer a lot of questions about myself and I'm glad I did it, it was also a wonderful encounter.

As for other advice, LadyConstanze said it all quite well.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 10:20:34 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
I don't have anything to add to what LC said, except of of course bathe :) and do not be afraid to speak up! It's up to you to communicate your feelings & reactions.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to Muttling)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 11:15:31 AM   
popularDemand


Posts: 228
Status: offline
Take money

pD

_____________________________


A sentence should be like a serpent: Quick with a sting in its tail. String me a line that has meaning and depth.
There's no small talk with walky-talkies.
Small talk stinks.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 11:17:38 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 8307
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I don't have anything to add to what LC said, except of of course bathe :) and do not be afraid to speak up! It's up to you to communicate your feelings & reactions.


Oh yes, a nice shower before and uhh lots of personal hygiene, and do not overdo the aftershave...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 1:12:01 PM   
popularDemand


Posts: 228
Status: offline
more money if you want a fuck

pD

_____________________________


A sentence should be like a serpent: Quick with a sting in its tail. String me a line that has meaning and depth.
There's no small talk with walky-talkies.
Small talk stinks.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 1:18:02 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6446
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: popularDemand

more money if you want a fuck

pD


I'm under the impression most professional dommes make it clear they won't have sex with you, but perhaps LC can chime in?

James, please do everything you can to ensure you are going to a great professional and not just some chick with a crop willing to take your money.




_____________________________

I haz decoder ring! I are dominate !

For those new to BDSM:


http://beyond50shades.com/


(in reply to popularDemand)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 2:15:23 PM   
MistressRage


Posts: 98
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Upstate New York
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: popularDemand

more money if you want a fuck


At James Harvey —Don't pay attention to this guy's post and don't go in expecting sex.

Listen to the Dommes about showering and calling if you need to cancel. Seeing a pro is a great way to gain experience and it adds to your sub resume when you do finally meet a lifestyle Domme. If a prospective sub has seen a ProDomme it lets me know that's he probably serious about serving, at least to some extent.

Most of all have fun and enjoy yourself. I wish you the best and hope it goes well for you.

< Message edited by MistressRage -- 6/18/2011 2:17:09 PM >


_____________________________

Mistress Rage
~outRAGEous~

With regard to opposing viewpoints—you cannot understand the immensity of the fuck I do not give.

(in reply to popularDemand)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 2:19:21 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 27097
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: online
quote:

ORIGINAL: popularDemand

more money if you want a fuck

pD


Yup.  Enough to cover her bail if she's dumb enough to do that.

Money for sex is called prostitution.  It's illegal.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to popularDemand)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 2:55:08 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

Listen to the Dommes about showering and calling if you need to cancel. Seeing a pro is a great way to gain experience and it adds to your sub resume when you do finally meet a lifestyle Domme. If a prospective sub has seen a ProDomme it lets me know that's he probably serious about serving, at least to some extent.


Now, I do not know much about such things, seriously... so I say this with no disrespect intended at all, but from what I have seen posted on the forums from lifestyle dommes, hiring a pro wouldn't be useful on a resume. The sub is basically paying to be dominated the way they desire... so how does this tell a dominant anything about how service oriented a male submissive is?

I am sincerely asking, because I had no idea that lifestyle dominants would think positively (or negatively) about hiring a pro

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to MistressRage)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 4:21:09 PM   
popularDemand


Posts: 228
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: popularDemand

more money if you want a fuck

pD


Yup.  Enough to cover her bail if she's dumb enough to do that.

Money for sex is called prostitution.  It's illegal.


so, it would appear, is humour. Alledgedly

pD

_____________________________


A sentence should be like a serpent: Quick with a sting in its tail. String me a line that has meaning and depth.
There's no small talk with walky-talkies.
Small talk stinks.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 4:27:58 PM   
FullCircle


Posts: 5659
Joined: 11/24/2005
Status: offline
I should probably not say that.

< Message edited by FullCircle -- 6/18/2011 4:31:34 PM >


_____________________________

If you make a bad first impression try doing Michael Caine, he's entry level!

(in reply to popularDemand)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 5:50:53 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

It's illegal.
Not everywhere. 

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!


Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 7:35:24 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 28389
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRage
At James Harvey —Don't pay attention to this guy's post and don't go in expecting sex.

Listen to the Dommes about showering and calling if you need to cancel. Seeing a pro is a great way to gain experience and it adds to your sub resume when you do finally meet a lifestyle Domme. If a prospective sub has seen a ProDomme it lets me know that's he probably serious about serving, at least to some extent.

Most of all have fun and enjoy yourself. I wish you the best and hope it goes well for you.

Not for all of us.  If anything, I'd rather see someone who has no experience at all than someone who has been a client.  I don't want people who are used to having the service that they wanted provided and think all of D/s is something that they do when they feel like it for the fee that they are willing to pay.  That's like saying that using an escort service know what it's like to be married because they are practicing for a relationship.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction.

Happy to say, one of the luckiest people on the internet for the two men in My life.

I use "tk" for an abbreviation of what I've named My submissive.


(in reply to MistressRage)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/18/2011 9:46:49 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
I am okay with those who have had experience with pros. As a former pro dom, I know what their experience adds up to, and I don't mind that it had nothing to do with "submission".

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/19/2011 4:29:37 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 8307
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arpig

quote:

It's illegal.
Not everywhere. 



It wouldn't be illegal in several European countries, Australia and I think Canada, but it's not done, but I guess there will always be idiots who think it's a question of money, they are usually surprised when they are being shown the door...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/19/2011 4:35:59 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 8307
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I am okay with those who have had experience with pros. As a former pro dom, I know what their experience adds up to, and I don't mind that it had nothing to do with "submission".



Actually the same here, it shows me that they wanted to explore and don't just expect to get their kink fulfilled because they declare themselves "lifestyle", pretty much depends on how they describe their experience and how they come across.
Guys who've seen pro-dommes usually know that there is a massive difference between booking a session and having a life-style relationship, on the other hand plenty of guys who proudly announce they'd never pay for a pro expect the same service for free, I guess we women have to show them our "twueness" by giving them service a la carte without charging...

Btw I found this a great way to get rid of people who send me laundry lists of what they want to have done to them, you just send them back a mail saying "That will be amount X for an hour!" And you never ever hear from them again, if you tell them "Not interested" and block them, they usually come back with another name.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/19/2011 4:43:10 AM   
ExquisiteStings


Posts: 385
Joined: 4/10/2007
Status: offline
Lady Constanze,

I like how you word things.

ES

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Visiting a dominatrix for the first time - 6/19/2011 8:00:32 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 8307
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExquisiteStings

Lady Constanze,

I like how you word things.

ES




Is that a nice way of saying you don't mind a bit of bluntness?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to ExquisiteStings)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Visiting a dominatrix for the first time Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2014
Collarchat.com is a member of the Free Speech Coalition
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.141