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RE: My Poly Story


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RE: My Poly Story - 7/16/2011 12:31:38 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 20705
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		Just let Me know when you get back to the States.  November is just around the corner.  

_____________________________

"Come to the edge, She said.
He said that he was afraid.
Come to the edge, She said.
He came. She pushed him,
And he flew . . ."


http://NE2010.net

Now running "Lady Pact's World".

(in reply to SirLucifer)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: My Poly Story - 7/16/2011 11:56:31 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 6672
Joined: 6/26/2005
Status: online 		personally it sounds to me like you need to talk to a therapist or your chaplain to learn how to be more social and how to be in a normal relationship before you get involved in bdsm but that's my opinion if I was ever getting to know someone like you.

Best of luck to you.



_____________________________

Breathe
Surrender
Tell me, what is there to complain about?

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 4:30:54 AM   
SirLucifer


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/22/2010
From: Alaska, FL, Wherever.
Status: offline 		Well I attribute my social awkwardness to both being raised in a rediculously strict southern christian household, and my simply introverted nature, I'm a bit of a nerd, haha. Don't get me wrong I can be social, I have friends and acquaintences outside of work, and I hang out with them and go to parties and whatnot. I'm a bit shy around the ladies, but I loosen up after I talk to them for a bit. Hardly anything I think I'd need to see a therapist or gods forbid a chap..... chapla... I can't even say it lol. Fuck that noise :)

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 4:56:29 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLucifer

Well I attribute my social awkwardness to both being raised in a rediculously strict southern christian household, and my simply introverted nature, I'm a bit of a nerd, haha. Don't get me wrong I can be social, I have friends and acquaintences outside of work, and I hang out with them and go to parties and whatnot. I'm a bit shy around the ladies, but I loosen up after I talk to them for a bit. Hardly anything I think I'd need to see a therapist or gods forbid a chap..... chapla... I can't even say it lol. Fuck that noise :)


At last. An American who doesn't run off to a therapist every time they stub their toe :)

This is my role model ;)

http://youtu.be/unkIVvjZc9Y

(in reply to SirLucifer)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 5:59:20 AM   
SirLucifer


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/22/2010
From: Alaska, FL, Wherever.
Status: offline 		Whoa, whoa, whoa! Since when can you play snake while your video is loading on Youtube?!? That's amazing!

(in reply to RapierFugue)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 6:01:33 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirLucifer

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Since when can you play snake while your video is loading on Youtube?!? That's amazing!


lol! :)

(in reply to SirLucifer)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 6:14:01 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6389
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RapierFugue

At last. An American who doesn't run off to a therapist every time they stub their toe :)

This is my role model ;)

http://youtu.be/unkIVvjZc9Y



right?!
(and that video is funny -- poor stefan!)

i don't think it's necessary to visit a therapist for shyness alone. i'm terribly shy, but i think i'm better put together mentally than a lot of people i meet. i can analyze and deal with my own nonsense. =p


_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


(in reply to RapierFugue)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 6:25:09 AM   
RapierFugue


Posts: 4740
Joined: 3/16/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

(and that video is funny -- poor stefan!)


Yeah I love the Stefan one ... and the DJ one ... “ha-ha-ha-ha-HARDEN THE FUCK UP!” :)

Hey I'm not saying all therapy is bad! But it amazes me sometimes how, in America, it's the first resort, not the last. If you've got schizophrenia or PTSD or clinical depression or another genuine mental issue then fair play. But the number of people toddling along just coz they're feeling a bit grumpy is bizarre.

When I was last in DC a friend of a friend said, without a trace of irony; "I'm going to see <x> this week coz the dog's been depressed and she's transferred her depression onto me"*. FFS! :) These are the descendants of the people who built America! Frontier folk!

*I thought it was an ironic joke, and threw my head back and laughed like a cavalier. Imagine my surprise when it turned out to be a genuine statement. Icy doesn't begin to describe the atmosphere in the room. But I found it bloody funny, so it was ok :)

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 9:48:24 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 5944
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterChanning



Thank you. And i certianly don't intend on trying to "buy her" she actually helped me out (monetarily) when I was in a bad place and I merely want to repay the favor, I probably should have mentioned that I started rambling a bit there at the end, my apologies.

I try to always try my best to take the advise of others more experienced in life than I.


Repaying your debts is the honourable thing to do, so my compliments for that.

As for trying to find another relationship, no way and not yet, you're still cut up about what went wrong, give yourself time, work through it and when you feel ready, just mingle. You know once you are happy being on your own and you don't want another relationship, at least not straight away, that's usually when it happens.

To be blunt, you're carrying tons of baggage with you from your old relationship, it's understandable and it shows you're not shallow, now would it be fair to enter a relationship with that baggage? How would you react if somebody would bring the baggage into a relationship with you?


_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

(in reply to MasterChanning)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 11:08:17 AM   
SirLucifer


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/22/2010
From: Alaska, FL, Wherever.
Status: offline 		Well put. I don't intend on entering into a relationship for a looooong time. I feel I have some "catching up" to do ;) but I will wait till I get home and settled in.

I talked to her today. She's got her own phone number and started working Friday. She still pays the (my) bills and whatnot. I kind of turned a "cold shoulder" on the phone with her.

She was saying I love you and I said, "Call the bank and... then send me (info) on facebook, bye." and hung up. I felt bad for a few minutes, then I felt like I severed the connection just a tiny bit more.

I'm feeling better about it now.

< Message edited by SirLucifer -- 7/17/2011 11:09:06 AM >

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: My Poly Story - 7/17/2011 11:59:24 AM   
Charnegui


Posts: 1352
Joined: 5/1/2011
From: Puzzled
Status: offline 		You did right....
As long as you're being fair in case of the bills and so...
But you have to protect yourself, so the hanging up part, is absolutely right to do.

Hey if you feel any need of getting some support otherwise, try the I admit..... thread.
And even if  it looks like it that way, we're not a bunch of old lady's whining, but just getting clear with our daily life and struggles.

I know you have to take a step behind and create some distance (emotionally then, b/c the actually distance is great enough between the 2 of you) and it may take some time, b/f your heart is healed. But let it be, concentrate on the beautifull things in life.
Friends and so.... At least you have the chance to see something of the world.

_____________________________

There's a difference between my personality and my attitude; My personality is who I ám, my attitude depends on who you are.

(in reply to SirLucifer)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: My Poly Story - 7/18/2011 6:48:04 AM   
SirLucifer


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/22/2010
From: Alaska, FL, Wherever.
Status: offline 		Ok so, I demanded that a submissive friend of mine talk to me, as I haven't talked to her in a while since all of this surfaced and I assumed she didn't want to take sides (which was a correct assumption). She was aggrivated for about 2 seconds, then submitted, good girl :)

Long story short...

He PROPOSED to her. And they told my friend not to tell me. How fucked up is that? [RAGE]

I told her that I wouldn't mention it, so they don't get upset with her, because I don't want her being caught in a crossfire here, she's a good girl.

In fact, if her boyfriend wasn't around, she wanted to play, but alas, respect was given.

So... I'm over giving her any slack (monetarily/emotionally) at all right now. In fact I'm headed to the gym to run off some steam.

(in reply to Charnegui)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: My Poly Story - 7/19/2011 4:53:05 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 8119
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		You may wish to avoid choosing drama llamas for friends

(in reply to SirLucifer)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: My Poly Story - 7/19/2011 6:12:51 PM   
Buzzzz


Posts: 771
Joined: 11/28/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Ok so, I demanded that a submissive friend of mine talk to me, as I haven't talked to her in a while since all of this surfaced and I assumed she didn't want to take sides (which was a correct assumption

you demanded that she talks to you.. SAY WHAT?? I little too "serious " for me.

_____________________________

_"Here is something you should never do to anyone.And here is exactly how to do it to someone you care about". Flagg._



(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: My Poly Story - 7/20/2011 3:57:10 AM   
SirLucifer


Posts: 37
Joined: 1/22/2010
From: Alaska, FL, Wherever.
Status: offline 		Haha, it was more like me saying "I need to speak with you now, girl." on her FB wall, lol. She told me today that she liked it haha. And she's not a "drama llama" she stay's away from it, really.

I was reading through the Poly forum lastnight and happened upon LadyPact's poly thread.

I realize now that this situation probably could have been avoided in the beginning by simply saying "No" and going about it in a much different (slower, methodical) manner.

But Alas, if we only all had time machines. I'm not saying it was my fault, and I' guessing it would ahve eventually happened anyhow. Just some thoughts.

< Message edited by SirLucifer -- 7/20/2011 3:58:11 AM >

(in reply to Buzzzz)
Profile   Post #: 35
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