SuzeCheri
Posts: 483
Joined: 7/19/2011
From: Outside looking in
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First, unless the workshop is for a specifically kink-oriented group I would seriously play down the M/s aspects of your relationship, but that would make it a little difficult to explain the conflict resolution part of things.
Now, on to the answer.
I think a really important point to cover is the enormous differences in the various different hierarchical structures possible and how those, more than almost anything else, will dictate how the poly unit functions.
A solution that works for your house would be unlikely to work in LadyP's or ours, and visa versa. This incompatibility of solutions is due to the different numbers of people involved and the way those people have structured their interactions.
I'm probably going to use the wrong words in the next part, so hopefully you can overlook that and get the gist of it anyway, so here goes. I'm going to use our house, yours, and LadyP's as examples, simply because I am more familiar with the structures of those three
In your house, all the members are involved with all the members so I would say all three of you are being poly, furthermore, all are within the scope of the single D/s relationship
In LadyP's house only she is really being poly, as there is only a friendship connection between MrP and clip, and further, the D/s applies only to her and clip.
In our house, like yours, we are all being poly, but the D/s apect only applies to two of the four.
Now assuming we are dealing with these three houses, then you can see how the problem solving and conflict resolution would be handled differently. In your case, any conflicts will be your department, and will be the business of all involved.
In LadyP's house, there are effectively two unrelated relationships, so most of the conflicts will only be the business of 2 of the 3, and how it is resolved will depend on which of the two relationships is involved. Issues between her and MrP will be handled very differently from issues between her and clip.
In our house, there are some issues that are strictly the business of Hannah and Heather, and others that are the business of us all, and those will each be handled differently as well.
This is the thing I would most want from a poly workshop, not how you handle things, but some different examples of how poly houses are structured and how they handle things based on those structures. So ideally you would present a basic principle, then provide some examples of how that principle is applied in a few different houses to show how that principle can be applied in the very different structures of the different houses. Give the audience some templates to use in trying to adapt the basic principles to each of their own very unique situations.
Another thing would be some concrete examples of rituals and or procedures in place. For example, it is one thing to say "communication is key", but that is sort of vague, some ideas on how individual houses arrange for that communication would be helpful, such as maybe regularly setting aside a specific time to have a state of the union discussion, calling impromptu family meetings, or some sort of formalized complaints department type arrangement.
I guess basically what I would like to get out of a workshop is not just the principles, but a few concrete examples of how different houses implemented those principles.
Sorry for rambling, typing as I think.
S.
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