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Domme help - 8/5/2012 11:50:42 PM

goddessGisele

Posts: 3
Status: offline

I have always been intrigued by bdsm particularly in being a domme . I recently started to develop a relationship with a man who is looking to be submissive and have someone take complete control him. He has had experience with cuckolding, beatings, humiliation, chastity, etc.. I have no experience with any of these things and I'd like to learn but have no clue where to start. How did you guys get into being a mistress/dom and does anyone have any advice?

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RE: Domme help - 8/6/2012 1:12:17 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
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I'm not a domme so I can't offer much personal advice beyond talk, talk, talk. Communicate constantly about what's working and what isn't. Keep adapting until you find what gives you both the warm fuzzies.

This site is written by a member here and is full of sensible advice:

http://www.akashaweb.com/goodgirl.html

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Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to goddessGisele)

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RE: Domme help - 8/6/2012 3:15:32 AM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: goddessGisele

I have always been intrigued by bdsm particularly in being a domme . I recently started to develop a relationship with a man who is looking to be submissive and have someone take complete control him. He has had experience with cuckolding, beatings, humiliation, chastity, etc.. I have no experience with any of these things and I'd like to learn but have no clue where to start. How did you guys get into being a mistress/dom and does anyone have any advice?

Not to put you off, but a guy saying he is looking for somebody to take control of him and actually giving up control are 2 different things, depends also which experience he has had in the past, a lot of things that seem great in fantasy aren't actually all that great in reality.

Basically start with your own interests and explore those, it's not about you servicing him, it's something you should enjoy too, so you best find common ground and go from there, don't run before you walk.

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There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

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(in reply to goddessGisele)

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RE: Domme help - 8/6/2012 10:40:47 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

I'm not a domme so I can't offer much personal advice beyond talk, talk, talk. Communicate constantly about what's working and what isn't. Keep adapting until you find what gives you both the warm fuzzies.

This site is written by a member here and is full of sensible advice:

http://www.akashaweb.com/goodgirl.html

Thank you!

I actually put the whole guide up and in a much easier to read format:

http://www.akashaweb.com/updates/GoodGirlsFreePreview.html

Akasha

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Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

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RE: Domme help - 8/6/2012 4:57:22 PM

goddessGisele

Posts: 3
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Akasha your good girls guide was extremely helpful! Thanks

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RE: Domme help - 8/6/2012 11:47:32 PM

BambiBoi

Posts: 461
Joined: 8/10/2010
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Solid guide, I've bookmarked it too. I would emphasize the importance to doing what YOU want as a domme. You can fake it and do what you think he likes for a while. If you worry only about your partner's pleasure eventually you'll crack and become Bambi. That's called being a service top. He wants to enjoy your enjoyment. But he can't do that if all you're doing is trying to please him. Fight the sensation that you're being selfish. He wants you to be selfish.

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Post #: 6