My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety

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My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 6:40:25 AM

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why would my master punish me by instructing me NOT to text him or call him first and that I was only to respond to his instructions or questions until further notice?? It has left me feeling anxious, sad and most of all he is only thing I can concentrate on
Please note I am new and I want to please him more than the air I breathe but my latest task is leaving me confused

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 6:42:06 AM

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What were you doing before he gave you this instruction?
You said "punish" -- is this your interpretation or did he call it punishment?

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 6:48:41 AM

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I was being a brat I was missing him and got a bitchy attitude when didn't talk much one day. I'm also a overthinker, so this punishment is really hard. I know it should be I know I was wrong and accept my consequence but I'm trying to understand it as well. He is my world and I would do anything he asked without ever questioning him, and I've been punished before but not being allowed to text and say I miss you or good morning or good night or anything has me filled with anxiety, stress, remorse

(in reply to Alecta)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:00:50 AM

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So he has decided to punish you and teach you a lesson that fits the crime. Seems right.
Sounds like he wants you to understand and remember that it's a privilege to initiate contact with him and send him your thoughts, so you won't abuse it again.

How long has it been since he gave you the order?

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:01:02 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16

why would my master punish me by instructing me NOT to text him or call him first and that I was only to respond to his instructions or questions until further notice?? It has left me feeling anxious, sad and most of all he is only thing I can concentrate on
Please note I am new and I want to please him more than the air I breathe but my latest task is leaving me confused

Not knowing anything about your particular situation, it's not uncommon for a dominant to restrict access now and then. If it is, indeed, a punishment, you're not supposed to like it. I'm not sure what you're confused about, though. The instructions, as you've provided, seem clear enough to me. The only thing that would have me concerned is not knowing how long "until further notice" is. I feel like the duration should be more clearly defined.

quote:

I was being a brat I was missing him and got a bitchy attitude when didn't talk much one day. I'm also a overthinker, so this punishment is really hard. I know it should be I know I was wrong and accept my consequence but I'm trying to understand it as well. He is my world and I would do anything he asked without ever questioning him, and I've been punished before but not being allowed to text and say I miss you or good morning or good night or anything has me filled with anxiety, stress, remorse

I have found that time/distance, more than anything else, has helped me to understand either where I went wrong or why I gave him the impression that I went wrong somewhere. Try looking at this reflection time as something useful rather than something to fret over. And then you can both address it after you've both had some time to digest what happened.

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:03:22 AM

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3 days

(in reply to Alecta)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:06:34 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16

3 days

There you go, then.

When I am full of anxiety in a situation similar to the one you're in, it's usually because I know I was wrong. That's not always easy to feel. And sometimes (I hate to say it) my gut instinct is to fight that, defend myself, or make the argument that in this particular instance, I'm not disobedient. Sit with those feelings you're feeling, make use of them, acknowledge them, and understand that you don't want to feel this way again.

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:12:34 AM

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I'm sorry it's been 3 days since I was given my punishment... I don't know the duration of my punishment, and I cannot ask because he said I am only to respond to his direct question and or instructions. I am not disobedient either and I literally feel like I've been punched in the stomach. I know I was wrong and told him I was, I know it's a privilege to initiate contact I would do anything to have that privilege back. Thank you for helping I appreciate it, and I am trying to better myself for him while waiting. Even though it may not seem severe to some to me it is

(in reply to Kaliko)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:35:10 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaliko
The only thing that would have me concerned is not knowing how long "until further notice" is. I feel like the duration should be more clearly defined.

with me, "until further notice" in a punishment generally means "when I can see you have genuinely learnt your lesson (and when I've calmed down, whichever is sooner)".

3 days is really short though, especially if he is still communicating to you.

(in reply to Kaliko)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:40:19 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Alecta

So he has decided to punish you and teach you a lesson that fits the crime. Seems right.
Sounds like he wants you to understand and remember that it's a privilege to initiate contact with him and send him your thoughts, so you won't abuse it again.

How long has it been since he gave you the order?

OMG!

I find this emotionally abusive. She is still a human being!
I just shake my head when I see people thinking this is the acceptable behaviour of a dominant who wants to correct his submissive behaviour.

Cold treatment in any world, is just not right to solve communication problems.

(in reply to Alecta)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:43:14 AM

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I do not feel as my punishment is wronf. I was wrong I shouldn't have been inpatient and selfish. I accept the punishment it's just hard I over analyze everything and no being allowed to intitate contact is something I am
Of used to but I know I will not be inpatient or selfish again

(in reply to Greta75)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:45:18 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16
why would my master punish me by instructing me NOT to text him or call him first and that I was only to respond to his instructions or questions until further notice?? It has left me feeling anxious, sad and most of all he is only thing I can concentrate on
Please note I am new and I want to please him more than the air I breathe but my latest task is leaving me confused

Personally, unless you signed up for an emotional sadist. And this is what rocks your world.
I think his intention IS to make you feel like anxious and suffer.

And I think it's very spiteful and childish behaviour on his part.

Personally for me. I'd never talk to him again even if he contact me later. If he plays this childish cold treatment game. Then, two can play. He can't behave like a sensible adult who can treat me with respect and can communicate his displeasure in words then I lose respect for him too.

But yes, he definitely intended it to correct your behaviour with terrible methods I feel. But the worst of it all is. He has not communicated exactly what is the correct behaviour he expects from you. He just tells you, he don't want you to contact him until he contacts you. That's horrible.

But then you read Kaliko who enjoys this. So end of the day, there is no right or wrong, but if I were you, I would consider if this dominant is healthy to my emotional state and cares about my emotional welfare at all. As you need someone who isn't out to harm you. And to me, he is intentionally hurting you emotionally right now and it's EXTREMELY spiteful and intentional. All because you missed him? That is emotional abuse. Being punished for needing him.

< Message edited by Greta75 -- 9/27/2016 7:55:44 AM >

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:46:58 AM

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I disapprove of giving open ended abandonment like this. What if it's six months till he calls? What if his "instructions" are to risk becoming a sex offender?

Basically, you don't improve communication by ending it.

If you're fine with this, take it. If you disapprove of this, then don't bother responding when/if he eventually calls. And fix your people picker so in the future you get involved with adults who do communication. Instead of those who don't.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Greta75)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:51:50 AM

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Each D/S relationship is different and I respect your opinion. However I am very devoted to my Master and would never intentionally disobey him, to me that is childish and extremely disrespectful. And I know whatever his intentions are they are in my best interest to better me and I accept any and all consequences given. Again I respect your opinion but I respectfully disagree with your definition of his intent

(in reply to Greta75)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 7:54:30 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16
And I know whatever his intentions are they are in my best interest to better me and I accept any and all consequences given. Again I respect your opinion but I respectfully disagree with your definition of his intent

If you know they are in your best interest, then why are you upset about it? If he is doing what is best for you right now? I mean..., just saying!
The words were from you, he has now made you sad, anxious.
But then again, as I said, if someone doing this to you rocks your universe! Enjoy! And I wish you all the happiness in all his treatment.

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 8:08:38 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
I just shake my head when I see people thinking this is the acceptable behaviour of a dominant who wants to correct his submissive behaviour.

Cold treatment in any world, is just not right to solve communication problems.

I don't see it as cold treatment, but I'm assuming that he is still giving her instructions and talking to her, just isn't letting her text him without permission.

For curiosity's sake, how would you expect to be punished in this situation?

(in reply to Greta75)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 9:35:31 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16

I do not feel as my punishment is wronf. I was wrong I shouldn't have been inpatient and selfish. I accept the punishment it's just hard I over analyze everything and no being allowed to intitate contact is something I am
Of used to but I know I will not be inpatient or selfish again

IMO, a good Dominant sets his submissive up to succeed and become good at what they do. Punishment doesn't achieve that. (Punitive vs rehabilitative)

Your feelings are your feelings. Punishing you won't change those feelings. It will change how you deal with those feelings, but not in a healthy way because now you're going to just bottle them up.

In my mind, not talking about a situation is the wrong punishment.

So, what is he doing to help you with your impatience and selfishness?

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 9:39:11 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: newbabygirl16

Each D/S relationship is different and I respect your opinion. However I am very devoted to my Master and would never intentionally disobey him, to me that is childish and extremely disrespectful. And I know whatever his intentions are they are in my best interest to better me and I accept any and all consequences given. Again I respect your opinion but I respectfully disagree with your definition of his intent

How long has this relationship existed? And is this online or real life?

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 9/27/2016 9:56:08 AM >

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to newbabygirl16)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 10:09:16 AM

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Yes he talking to me I cannot initiate contact first that is hard because I usually am allowed

(in reply to Alecta)

RE: My masters instructions have left me full of anxiety - 9/27/2016 10:10:58 AM

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Two years and real life

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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