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Slutjohn -> Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 3:00:18 AM)
i am new to this life style and will have my first meeting with my Keeper a week from now and wanted some advice from anyone that would like to share

littleclip -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 4:46:02 AM)
have a open mind and try not to have any preconceived ideas. you can ask questions and expect answer. always communicate with your keeper. accept your mistakes and apologize for mistakes. good luck on your journey

HonorInSlavery -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 5:30:03 AM)
That's exciting! Make sure they are trustworthy. If you haven't met make sure to use or consider a safe call system.

DesFIP -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 7:51:24 AM)
Stop thinking of him as your partner until you've dated in real life. Right now it's just pixels on a screen. For all you know he's married, twenty years older than he told you, and a hundred pounds heavier. You're establishing a relationship and like all other relationships, you need compatibility, communication, fair fighting and active listening skills among a host of others.

OsideGirl -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 10:15:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Slutjohn i am new to this life style and will have my first meeting with my Keeper a week from now and wanted some advice from anyone that would like to share My advice is that he's not your keeper. He's just some guy you've been talking to. He's a stranger. Don't submit to someone you've never met. It's entirely possible that when you meet there will be no chemistry and you've now confused the issue. My second piece of advice is hide the wiener - people in the forums don't want to see it.

DaddyKiss -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 10:27:57 AM)
All good advice, specially the wiener part... ;-/

Gauge -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 10:42:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Slutjohn i am new to this life style and will have my first meeting with my Keeper a week from now and wanted some advice from anyone that would like to share Since you give little or nothing regarding the subject of the advice you seek, I will just kind of shotgun my answers and hope they apply. First of all, you are new to this, so slow down, and think first before you do anything. At the top of the General BDSM forum there is a thread that is stickied with a book list. I suggest you pick one or more of them up and read it cover to cover. My suggestion would be The Loving Dominant by John Warren. How much do you know about the person you are meeting? Have you done a background check? Do you know what a safe call is? Are you meeting in a public place? Is there an expectation of physical play? Have you discussed your limits, physical, mental or BDSM related limits? If not, you need to establish them before a hand is laid on you. If you have, has your partner acknowledged them and said that he understands them? This is all very important to do. Look, you are going to be restrained by this person, possibly immobilized, do you trust them to do this to you? If you hesitate even half a second before answering that question, then you should not allow that to happen until you do trust them... not blind trust either, actual trust. I'm going to repeat myself here because I cannot stress it enough, slow down and think first before you do anything. If this is the first time you are meeting, it needs to be in public, not a bedroom, simply for your own safety. When you do meet them, just be yourself. One last thing, you really should change your forum avatar, no one really wants to see your naughty bits.

Greatlilbabygirl -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 10:53:24 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Gauge quote: ORIGINAL: Slutjohn i am new to this life style and will have my first meeting with my Keeper a week from now and wanted some advice from anyone that would like to share Since you give little or nothing regarding the subject of the advice you seek, I will just kind of shotgun my answers and hope they apply. First of all, you are new to this, so slow down, and think first before you do anything. At the top of the General BDSM forum there is a thread that is stickied with a book list. I suggest you pick one or more of them up and read it cover to cover. My suggestion would be The Loving Dominant by John Warren. How much do you know about the person you are meeting? Have you done a background check? Do you know what a safe call is? Are you meeting in a public place? Is there an expectation of physical play? Have you discussed your limits, physical, mental or BDSM related limits? If not, you need to establish them before a hand is laid on you. If you have, has your partner acknowledged them and said that he understands them? This is all very important to do. Look, you are going to be restrained by this person, possibly immobilized, do you trust them to do this to you? If you hesitate even half a second before answering that question, then you should not allow that to happen until you do trust them... not blind trust either, actual trust. I'm going to repeat myself here because I cannot stress it enough, slow down and think first before you do anything. If this is the first time you are meeting, it needs to be in public, not a bedroom, simply for your own safety. When you do meet them, just be yourself. One last thing, you really should change your forum avatar, no one really wants to see your naughty bits. I need a Dom like you. There aren't enough that think this way. And it's partly my fault for not insisting that all that stuff happens before I jump into something. I'm starting to think it'll never happen for me. I hope the OP is smarter and things go better for him. Because it really hurts when it doesn't

Gauge -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 11:17:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl I need a Dom like you. There aren't enough that think this way. And it's partly my fault for not insisting that all that stuff happens before I jump into something. I'm starting to think it'll never happen for me. I hope the OP is smarter and things go better for him. Because it really hurts when it doesn't I am flattered. [:)] I guess my advice to you is to learn to be patient. Practically everything in my life that I have rushed into ended up in abject failure, so I learned to slow down and be patient. I now think before I act, and it has been amazingly successful for me, no more stubbing my toe. [:D]

Greatlilbabygirl -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 11:41:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Gauge quote: ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl I need a Dom like you. There aren't enough that think this way. And it's partly my fault for not insisting that all that stuff happens before I jump into something. I'm starting to think it'll never happen for me. I hope the OP is smarter and things go better for him. Because it really hurts when it doesn't I am flattered. [:)] I guess my advice to you is to learn to be patient. Practically everything in my life that I have rushed into ended up in abject failure, so I learned to slow down and be patient. I now think before I act, and it has been amazingly successful for me, no more stubbing my toe. [:D] I'll remember that if I'm ever ready to open up to another Dom. Right now I don't think I ever will be. And I'm not saying that to be dramatic, I just sincerely believe my situation and my sensitivity to catching feelings just aren't a good fit for a serious bdsm relationship. And I'd only consider a serious one, I'm done with casual.

tamaka -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 1:10:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl quote: ORIGINAL: Gauge quote: ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl I need a Dom like you. There aren't enough that think this way. And it's partly my fault for not insisting that all that stuff happens before I jump into something. I'm starting to think it'll never happen for me. I hope the OP is smarter and things go better for him. Because it really hurts when it doesn't I am flattered. [:)] I guess my advice to you is to learn to be patient. Practically everything in my life that I have rushed into ended up in abject failure, so I learned to slow down and be patient. I now think before I act, and it has been amazingly successful for me, no more stubbing my toe. [:D] I'll remember that if I'm ever ready to open up to another Dom. Right now I don't think I ever will be. And I'm not saying that to be dramatic, I just sincerely believe my situation and my sensitivity to catching feelings just aren't a good fit for a serious bdsm relationship. And I'd only consider a serious one, I'm done with casual. My advice for you is two- fold: 1. Don't get too impressed by doms who spend large amounts of time on message boards and seem to say all of the right things. I fell for that once and it turned out he wanted me to support him and though he was good at 'Philosophizing' online, his real life was a mess because he could talk the talk but not walk the walk. No offense to anyone here but it is just reality and as an older female sub, i would warn other subs about it. 2. If you don't already practice it, i highly recommend you try yoga. There is so much good that you can learn about taking care of yourself, body, heart, mind and spirit... and these days especially we need to be able to do that for ourselves first, before we open ourselves up to someone else. Just my opinion of what has helped me.

LilJuly76 -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 1:42:22 PM)
I'm echoing what Gauge, Oside and DesFIP said also wanted to add yeah get rid of the cock shot and speaking of cocks don't think with it, male new submissives tend to think with their cocks instead of taking excellent advice from the pros.

WickedsDesire -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 1:57:40 PM)
I like when reality vouches for reality – Alas you have none at all utter mess of non reality whose numbers are truly vast and the majority of these places I will vouch for the one you called gauge – and for the record we have never spoken and he owes me nothing at all…he exists with clarity of less than 1% of this place I am clarity everywhere would you like to disprove me, or any one else the ones who claim themselves as the majoirty

BitaTruble -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 2:29:36 PM)
Take a long hot bath before you go. It will help relax you. Drink a glass of water. It oxygenates the blood and can help you maintain your focus and with a clear head you are less likely to make errors of judgement or misjudge character if that's important to you. Trust your gut, use your head..that's a powerful one-two punch and if your heart agrees with your head and gut..that maybe a good start for getting into a new relationship. If any of those three is causing you unease, pay attention and ask yourself why. Baby steps still get you places so to reiterate what G said..patience.

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 2:55:32 PM)
quote: I am clarity everywhere would you like to disprove me No need, your post do that

WickedsDesire -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 2:56:19 PM)
There exists one genuine entity on here and that is me whom will have my glorious delights

tamaka -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 2:59:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire There exists one genuine entity on here and that is me whom will have my glorious delights And what might those be, pray tell?

WickedsDesire -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 3:18:15 PM)
tamaka = a man pretending its women and it builds on sophisms and your numbers are vast I am me, the one called Jamie with 3 cats CFS/ME many pictures a verified reality and number and a mind that would rival infinity But no one credible has ever emailed me on here in 12 years and I was also rejected from sophists in charge of many a forum and team fetlife Does the problem lie with me or you numerous kind

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 3:42:27 PM)
quote: Does the problem lie with me With you

tamaka -> RE: Question for a submissive (9/29/2016 4:20:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire tamaka = a man pretending its women and it builds on sophisms and your numbers are vast I am me, the one called Jamie with 3 cats CFS/ME many pictures a verified reality and number and a mind that would rival infinity But no one credible has ever emailed me on here in 12 years and I was also rejected from sophists in charge of many a forum and team fetlife Does the problem lie with me or you numerous kind Well since you're the common denominator i strongly suspect the problem might lie with you somehow. I would guess it has something to do with your communication style. But i could be wrong.

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