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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/16/2017 1:14:23 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14412
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Im in one of those marriages lucky to get it twice a month been married seven years together for 10 I can't take it anymore im ready to leave she is begging for me to stay. Im the sucker that stays with her and i have no kids at all. Someone with advice on this would help

Well, it seems it would be one of two things: Biological or mental.

It could be she's having hormonal imbalances. Or it could be that something your relationship makes her not desire sex with you.

So, I would suggest a counselor to be a mediator during a conversation that addresses the "WHY". If it's physical, help her find a doctor and help her deal with the tests and results.

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/16/2017 3:48:28 PM

AtUrCervix

Posts: 2111
Joined: 1/15/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Im in one of those marriages lucky to get it twice a month been married seven years together for 10 I can't take it anymore im ready to leave she is begging for me to stay. Im the sucker that stays with her and i have no kids at all. Someone with advice on this would help

Here's mine:

Change the locks.

(Tonight).

< Message edited by AtUrCervix -- 2/16/2017 3:49:35 PM >

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Post #: 22

RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/16/2017 3:49:51 PM

AtUrCervix

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Joined: 1/15/2016
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Thats not the problem i always satisfy she has a very low sex drive

Mine had zero.

Never had a single problem until this one (me, being a dumbass.....she, a holy roller.....we "saved it" for marriage....never again).

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Post #: 23

RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/18/2017 4:55:57 AM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Im in one of those marriages lucky to get it twice a month been married seven years together for 10 I can't take it anymore im ready to leave she is begging for me to stay. Im the sucker that stays with her and i have no kids at all. Someone with advice on this would help

Well, it seems it would be one of two things: Biological or mental.

It could be she's having hormonal imbalances. Or it could be that something your relationship makes her not desire sex with you.

So, I would suggest a counselor to be a mediator during a conversation that addresses the "WHY". If it's physical, help her find a doctor and help her deal with the tests and results.

Has she been thoroughly checked for Hypothyroidism? Much more common in women than in men, leads to a very low sex drive when not treated, and sorry to say, if she is getting pressured for sex, it's really not going to help. Sometimes it can be something simple like just a lack of Vitamin D, I'd recommend a full physical where she actually tells her OB Gyn about the loss of libido, rather than a GP I'd talk to the OB Gyn as they're the ones most familiar with it and they can also recommend an endocrinologist they have worked with before, rather than a random guy who might specialise in diabetic issues more and might not be as familiar with typical female problems.

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Post #: 24

RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/18/2017 7:41:02 AM

Greta75

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Im in one of those marriages lucky to get it twice a month been married seven years together for 10 I can't take it anymore im ready to leave she is begging for me to stay. Im the sucker that stays with her and i have no kids at all. Someone with advice on this would help

Can I ask you a question? You call yourself a "sucker who stays with her".

Clearly there must be a reason you are staying.

I think end of the day, it's weighing things right?

Despite the lack of sex, but there must be good stuffs about her that is making you stay.

If not, you need to question yourself, why are you staying?

I'm not encouraging you to leave, but you need to be staying for the right reasons.

That's what I am saying.

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/19/2017 5:12:27 PM

AtUrCervix

Posts: 2111
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Im in one of those marriages lucky to get it twice a month been married seven years together for 10 I can't take it anymore im ready to leave she is begging for me to stay. Im the sucker that stays with her and i have no kids at all. Someone with advice on this would help

Can I ask you a question? You call yourself a "sucker who stays with her".

Clearly there must be a reason you are staying.

I think end of the day, it's weighing things right?

Despite the lack of sex, but there must be good stuffs about her that is making you stay.

If not, you need to question yourself, why are you staying?

I'm not encouraging you to leave, but you need to be staying for the right reasons.

That's what I am saying.

Awesome advice.

Spectacularly not one sided....

And for those that simply (always) want to find fault with the male ("clearly....you're not producing the goods dude").....maybe.....(I know it's crazy).....maybe....there are actually men out there who.....DESPITE all the crazy they (we) have to deal with.....ACTUALLY take their vows seriously....and actually meant every word they said.

(No.....that would be crazy....delete...my error).

< Message edited by AtUrCervix -- 2/19/2017 5:13:31 PM >

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/19/2017 5:39:08 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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To most folks, sex is a really, really important part of the relationship.

Most of us like orgasms, right?

However, sex is only ONE PART of the relationship.

On another thread, a poster that I greatly respect said this. "If M's dick fell off..." She was talking about it STILL being a relationship. Sex is good. The relationship is better.

As for you -----

quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76
Thats not the problem i always satisfy she has a very low sex drive

Ever seen "When Harry Met Sally"?

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/20/2017 1:01:36 PM

LadyConstanze

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Joined: 2/18/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

To most folks, sex is a really, really important part of the relationship.

Most of us like orgasms, right?

However, sex is only ONE PART of the relationship.

On another thread, a poster that I greatly respect said this. "If M's dick fell off..." She was talking about it STILL being a relationship. Sex is good. The relationship is better.

As for you -----

quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76
Thats not the problem i always satisfy she has a very low sex drive

Ever seen "When Harry Met Sally"?

Totally, sex isn't the be and end of it all, if that would be it, most women would have only relationships with vibrators, most of us want a bit more than just mindless boinking, for most women getting sex is easy, a relationship with a guy who can offer a bit more and you click with, that is not that easy.

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/20/2017 5:30:48 PM

Hillwilliam

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Been there done that.
Not there any more.

Spirited sub...................fuck you..........not in a nice way either.
It's not ALWAYS the man's fault as you seem to think it is.

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Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/21/2017 10:31:37 AM

Boomer76

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Could be medical problems she has too many to list things have heated up last week in the bedroom we will see how long it lasts

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/21/2017 10:57:42 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14412
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Could be medical problems she has too many to list

So, are you encouraging her to see a Doctor? Supporting her emotionally? Being understanding?

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

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Post #: 31

RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/21/2017 12:36:36 PM

Boomer76

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Yes always but taking a wear and tear on our relationship i just want a healthier wife is that too much to ask most men wouldve been out of this marriage im so torn right now

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/21/2017 1:02:18 PM

tamaka

Posts: 5079
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boomer76

Yes always but taking a wear and tear on our relationship i just want a healthier wife is that too much to ask most men wouldve been out of this marriage im so torn right now

I guess that depends on who you ask ...lol

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RE: Sexless Marriage - 2/21/2017 1:47:12 PM

cloudboy

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(1) You have some pretty extreme photos up on your profile. Did you bury all this for 3 years while in a relationship with wife? If so, it's hard to back-pedal into some kind of D/s marriage b/c you're asking for it after the fact.

(2) When your kinks aren't another's -- expect some negative judgment.

(3) Would your wife accept any form of open marriage? Sounds to me like you'd have to have a limited, "don't ask and don't tell" arrangement.

(4) It's not going to be easy to find a willing Domme when you have such a young child at home demanding so much love and care from you.

(5) Not matter how judgmental the gallery is and how narrow minded the marriage police --- your life is yours and you've only got one chance to punch the items on your to-do list. IF you can satisfy your kinks and keep your marriage together -- then take calculated risks to do so. Life does not move in a straight line - and agility is often required to succeed at relationships.

(6) In moments of despair or hardship -- take stock of the good points in your marriage. Many marriages are not supported by a strong sexual connection. It might help you and your wife to find ways to talk about it that don't cause too much friction.

(in reply to subbyhubby8801)

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