LadyPact
Posts: 32566
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LTE This is interesting. It peaked my curiosity. I thought back to all those scenes at the club where men and women spent a great deal of time inflicting pain for mutual pleasure and most proudly admit to being a Dominant and a sadist. Including me. I always thought there were Dominant individuals in the vanilla and not so vanilla world and the not-so-vanilla world variety of Dominant includes sadists and those who love them. Perhaps we were all wrong. I shall have to clear this up with them tomorrow night and will quote you for support if I may. Feel free. Make sure you get the name right. It's Pact. When you do, I hope you'll discuss the matter with those in attendance who identify as Tops, sadistic or otherwise, because they just enjoy the BDSM aspect of the whole thing, though have no interest in the D/s part of the arrangement. (Do the same with those who only bottoming or masochism, though they don't identify as submissive. Wouldn't want to leave the other folks on the other side out.) Particularly look for those who have no power dynamic in their personal relationships, but have a blast beating each other or tying each other up. If you're going to an open play night of some kind, you probably won't find as many folks on the other side of it, those being the folks who are into the D/s part of it, but don't have the interest in the acts of tying/being tied, so on and so on. Simply put, the folks who don't "play". A bit harder to find these people at (for example) the random open play club night because, unless they are paying their door fees in the spirit of supporting the kink community, going for the social aspect, or some other thing, it's been my observation that open play nights don't have as much benefit to them as they do for the people actually engaging or interested in the S/m type of activities. I'm kind of familiar with this one, because I started out as a D that had no interest in the sadism aspects, so having been in that position, I can promise that some folks who are only interest themselves with the power exchange aspects aren't necessarily that "into" watching other people play. Be really clear about it though. Don't try to pseudo bullsh^t your interpretation that I ever said that a lot of people aren't both, or even that anyone can't be both. In fact, I tend to find that the generalization that most people tend to be both to be extremely off-putting to those who aren't. (More the folks that want some form of power exchange relationship because they are often painted as "less" because they have no interest in the BDSM part.) Maybe you'd be willing to discuss "The Topping Book" or "The Bottoming Book" with those who identify as sadists and masochist. Good Lord, I don't know how Mer***y puts up with some of you who come on this site and make his club look like it's full of... Well, let's just say what's been displayed on these forums from time to time over the years. I'm just grateful that I know better.
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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie. Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread
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