BishopFlirt
Posts: 1
Joined: 11/22/2015
Status: offline
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Hello fellow humans, and especially submissive females,
Here are a few things that are true about me:
* I have no plan for what I want to say in this introduction, so I will wing it. I suspect that some folks use this intro as a sales pitch. I suspect that mine is going to end up revealing a lot about how my mind works and what I'm like -- which will turn some folks off. The tradeoff will be that those who stick around will be more my kind of people.
* I'm a father. Also, I have fatherly, grounding energy.
* dominant.
* I'm tallish, darkish, handsomeish, yada yada. 43 (as of 2016); whether that's "oldish," "youngish" or "perfectly seasoned" I guess is a matter of perspective.
* I am a super nerd. Within nerd circles I have some superpowers.
* I'm a life-long learner. My research interests include female orgasm, and sexual psychology (two different multi-year projects). One way I like to play with power is in the role of research physician, taking a slightly detached, studied interest in my submissive's comfort, physiology and sexual response. And as psychologist of sexual experience, noting how her mind jumps in -- either enhancing pleasure or bringing resistance. I am so curious. My goals for my subs include training them to receive pleasure and flourish financially.
* oh yeah, lately I've started playing with financial dominance of the "total budget control" variety. (I am NOT interested in receiving tribute. My tribute is to feel you squirm as you vulnerably face the thing that's hard for you about finance, wealth and power. I'm a bit of a sadist. It also gives me great pleasure to train you. My goal for my subs is that they flourish financially and become massively wealthy.)
* Speaking of sadism... I was surprised a few months ago when a woman teaching a class on "how to teach people about sex" [so meta, right?] invited me to give a demonstration with her in front of the class. In it I went deeply into my sadist and felt how profoundly causing her physical pain (and verbally dominating her) turned on both of us as well as the audience.
So I'm a dominant, and excited to dominate physically and psychologically.
I'm still fairly new at it. (A few years of experience and a few relationships.)
What I notice is that there are a few things that get in my way.
* Sometimes I feel like "I should know everything already." That's like the opposite of beginner's mind. But when I fall into that line of thinking it's a trap that undermines my confidence.
* When I'm learning something new, I don't have effortless confidence with it.
* Then theres that painful period where I start to think "Hey, I'm starting to get good at this" but actually I still have a lot to learn. I can trip into shame when I realize I'm "making mistakes".
* What conclusions do I draw from the above? That actually I'm human. I have an impulse to dominate. It turns me on. Collapsing into self-doubt turns me off. I'm learning that I don't have to be perfect, and I can ask for feedback. And doing this has had the counterintuitive impact of making me feel more confident and at ease.
* There are also some areas where I'm naturally very confident and feel a deep source of power. I'm confident about money. I'm confident about sex. I'm confident about reading the energy in someone's body. And I'm relatively confident about using my words to reconnect and repair when there are upsets. Tapping into my areas of mastery has helped me bring confidence into areas where I am learning new things: like how to tie rope.
I notice that most of the introduction posts have no replies. If you have any questions, please ask. If you have comments, I invite your responses as well.
Warm regards,
Bishop
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