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Searching for a mistress - 8/13/2017 7:30:44 PM   
SlaveJefe


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/10/2016
Status: offline 		Greetings all, I am in search of a mistress and wanted to know the best way to search for one. I have used collarspace to no avail, any suggestions would be appreciated thanks.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/13/2017 7:40:55 PM   
MAINEiacMISTRESS


Posts: 1180
Joined: 9/12/2012
Status: offline 		Adjust your Search criteria, look for people in your area, check out profiles, and reach out to people. Attend local munches. You have been on CollarSpace less than two months. Don't expect immediate gratification. It takes time to find and get to know someone. Good luck.

(in reply to SlaveJefe)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/13/2017 8:01:03 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		These may help you:

Profile Help: How to Attract a Dominant Woman
and
CMail Help: How to Contact a Dominant Woman

_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to SlaveJefe)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/14/2017 7:46:54 AM   
ThatDizzyChick


Posts: 5490
Status: offline
quote:

wanted to know the best way to search for one

By scent. Buy a good bloodhound and you'll be swimming in misstresses.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

(in reply to SlaveJefe)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/14/2017 8:27:10 AM   
UllrsIshtar


Posts: 3693
Joined: 7/28/2012
Status: offline 		I've written this post several times over the years, in various itterations, for various people, towards various situations.
I really don't feel like writing it again, so I'm just going to copy the last version I did, and you'll have to use your imagination to make it apply.

It does apply. Every word of it. You just need to change 'female slave' for 'Domme', 'Dom' for 'male slave', and vice versa.

____________________________________________________


Well...
So... you want a slave girl... good... nearly every male Dom on this site wants the same, join the club.


The thing that leaves me wondering on if you're going to find her though is this: why?
Why would a girl want to be your slave?
What do you have to offer her?
What makes you different than every other male Dom looking for the same thing as you are?
Why YOU and not the next guy?

You give no information whatsoever on what SHE is getting out of this, other than that she'll have the privilege of being your slave.

If that's all a girl needed to beg a collar from a man then ANY man would do...
Seriously, it's not because you're looking for a slave that suddenly it becomes ALL about you.
Really... it doesn't become ALL about you until AFTER you've got that collar around her neck.

Prior to that, you are still courting a... WOMAN.

Not a slave, but a woman.
You are still trying to convince HER that you are the right guy for her.
That you're better than the next guy.
That you're different than the next guy.
That YOU are going to make HER feel special.
If you can't do that, then sorry dude, she IS going to move on to the next guy who CAN make her feel special...

So if you're the guy that has one of those none descript profiles... or one of those profiles that is all about what YOU want, and about what she has to offer to you... you might wanna think about that a little and make some adjustments to your profile...

Because that magical "perfect" woman for you you're describing here... she exists.
She really does exist.
But not only does she exist... she also has the luxury that EVERY guy like you wants her...
And because of that... it's HER and not you, that can afford to be VERY selective and picky about her future D/M/partner.
And sorry dude... unlike some of the other men out there... you just don't show that you've got her anything at all to offer...


So no matter how much you want her... she'll never want you...

Unless you clean up your act, and put forward some semblance of realism in your desires.

_____________________________

I can be your whore
I am the dirt you created
I am your sinner
And your whore
But let me tell you something baby
You love me for everything you hate me for

(in reply to ThatDizzyChick)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/14/2017 10:18:52 PM   
SlaveJefe


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/10/2016
Status: offline 		Thank you all for the help and appreciate you taking the time out of your day to respond.

(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/25/2017 9:15:40 AM   
spideycool69


Posts: 100
Joined: 1/14/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveJefe

Greetings all, I am in search of a mistress and wanted to know the best way to search for one. I have used collarspace to no avail, any suggestions would be appreciated thanks.


You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

(in reply to SlaveJefe)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/25/2017 1:39:54 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

Ya hear that, folks! Twitter is a requirement to be a Dominant. Same goes for NiteFlirt. Plus, you have to be the kind of person who has multiple accounts (aka sock puppets) to be <cough> well established <cough>.

Excuse me while I go laugh my ass off.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to spideycool69)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/25/2017 3:26:30 PM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

Ya hear that, folks! Twitter is a requirement to be a Dominant. Same goes for NiteFlirt. Plus, you have to be the kind of person who has multiple accounts (aka sock puppets) to be <cough> well established <cough>.

Excuse me while I go laugh my ass off.



I guess I somewhat qualify, since I got 2 Twitter accounts with several thousands following, only problem is both are strictly vanilla, one is a business account (and that is a vanilla business) the other one is a private one... Oh dear, I have been doing that wrong for so many years, mea culpa

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/25/2017 5:22:36 PM   
seekingOwnertoo


Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

Ya hear that, folks! Twitter is a requirement to be a Dominant. Same goes for NiteFlirt. Plus, you have to be the kind of person who has multiple accounts (aka sock puppets) to be <cough> well established <cough>.

Excuse me while I go laugh my ass off.



I guess I somewhat qualify, since I got 2 Twitter accounts with several thousands following, only problem is both are strictly vanilla, one is a business account (and that is a vanilla business) the other one is a private one... Oh dear, I have been doing that wrong for so many years, mea culpa


Heaven forbid!

MORE FAKE NEWS!

Whodda thunk there are REAL DOMMES, here!



_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/26/2017 7:40:46 AM   
spideycool69


Posts: 100
Joined: 1/14/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

Ya hear that, folks! Twitter is a requirement to be a Dominant. Same goes for NiteFlirt. Plus, you have to be the kind of person who has multiple accounts (aka sock puppets) to be <cough> well established <cough>.

Excuse me while I go laugh my ass off.



And, here folks is a domme wannabe. It seems i triggered this poor little cat.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/26/2017 8:18:35 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
You won't find any mistresses here dude. 99% of them here are pretenders and wannabes. A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website. Here, you won't find any real Mistresses. Here you can just interact with people like you do in any other forum. The people you interact with might be real or fake. So, don't take their word for it.

Ya hear that, folks! Twitter is a requirement to be a Dominant. Same goes for NiteFlirt. Plus, you have to be the kind of person who has multiple accounts (aka sock puppets) to be <cough> well established <cough>.

Excuse me while I go laugh my ass off.



And, here folks is a domme wannabe. It seems i triggered this poor little cat.

Nah. Problem is, I was in kink before the inception of twitter, was engaging before I even had a personal computer, and ridiculous crud like a social media presence determines whether or not people actually do this stuff. You'll have to pardon me for not being a millennial who believes that BDSM that comes via a screen. I've been swinging leather since before you had pubes, so you'll have to forgive me when I don't put a lot of merit into somebody who gets their kinks via electronic means.

These "real" Mistresses that you speak of? When was the last time you sat in the same living room with them? Or, are you so busy keeping score about their electronic media that you're more concerned with how many facebook followers they have, rather than how they participate in the real world?

While I'm out with my s-type this afternoon, exactly what will you be doing? Will you be sitting behind your computer, telling folks how "real" you are, while being completely ridiculous?

There's a difference between a realist and a fantasist. Those of us who actually engage in these things type with two hands.







_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to spideycool69)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/26/2017 8:30:14 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Mr Online only lives in a country where a woman who did this in real life would be stoned to death. Talking on niteflirt is as close as he'll ever come to it.

However, how he has read anything here without realizing that most of us are in countries where wiitwd is perfectly normal intimate behavior escapes me. Takes a hell of a lot of work to keep that closed a mind.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/26/2017 8:59:16 AM   
MsLadySue


Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline 		His profile is very interesting. So much detail about him as a person, his interests, etc. /sarcasm.
But he knows we're all fakes because no one wants to deal with him as an online anything without him having to pay for it.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/27/2017 6:36:59 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline 		That's usually how they sound when they are pissy about finding one they like and she turns out to be financial.... Ya know, cause you know he didnt bother reading the profile

_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to MsLadySue)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/28/2017 11:44:39 PM   
verbatimguy


Posts: 203
Joined: 5/11/2016
Status: offline 		Consider this thread the OP's calling card elevator pitch.

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/28/2017 11:51:04 PM   
ThatDizzyChick


Posts: 5490
Status: offline
quote:

And, here folks is a domme wannabe.

Yeah she's all sorts of shitty, but Domme wannabe isn't one of them.

_____________________________

Not your average bimbo.

(in reply to spideycool69)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/29/2017 4:28:05 AM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69



A well established mistress will have multiple accounts on different sites mostly findoms and niteflirt. She will have a twitter account with more than 100 followers. And, she may have her own website.

That is quite possibly one of the stupidest things I have seen written here.
Have you considered for a second what people did before social media existed?

They went OUT and MET people.
At least it's good to know that the term "Entitled Millenials" doesn't just apply to Americans.

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to spideycool69)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Searching for a mistress - 8/30/2017 9:21:08 PM   
Delilya


Posts: 4108
Joined: 2/2/2011
Status: offline 		I'll let my subs know that I am a fake and a charlatan right away.

_____________________________

“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

(in reply to Hillwilliam)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Searching for a mistress - 9/17/2017 4:40:22 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveJefe

Greetings all, I am in search of a mistress and wanted to know the best way to search for one. I have used collarspace to no avail, any suggestions would be appreciated thanks.


No. You haven't really used CS. You've been on three months, with one journal entry and two posts, a profile that says nothing about you, and a pic that shows that you like to be tied up. So your 'use" consists of sending unsolicited messages to Dommes.

There are several ways to go.

1. Collarspace. Fill out your profile. Take several additional pictures. If you don't want to show your face. Use pics that tell about you; for example, a wooded clearing shows you like the outdoors. Fill out your rofile text. Not with fetishes, but discussion of your favorite vanilla activities, your ambitions, why you picked your career, etc.

Then get active on the forums. If you can get the Dommes here to have a good opinion of you... Well, Lady Pact has contacts in places she has lived, such as Georgia, Alaska, and California. Ishtarr lives in Colorado now, but previously lived in Iowa. Anf they know people. You get the idea.

You won't get to know them just on the forums, though. Send them private messages and agree or disagree respectfully with their posts. Never mention sex.

2. Fetlife. Same as above, except you have more discussiom groups open to you.

3. Fetlife and events. Once you're on Fetlife, you can easily find local events and attend them.

Note that all options require you to talk with people, some of who will be Dommes. Start vanilla, open conversations with them, and genuinely enjoy the conversations. You'll stand out like a jewel in a puddle of mud.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to SlaveJefe)
Profile   Post #: 20
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