LadyPact -> RE: In honor of Veterens Day. (11/11/2017 9:31:07 PM)
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I know this day is hard for many people, so I want to try to say something at least mildly amusing. [:)] quote:
ORIGINAL: jlf1961 Universal truths that only vets can truly appreciate: 1) If you are issued tropical uniforms in January prior to deployment, it is correct assumption you will land at Elmendorf Air Force Base in Alaska, for a 'short' lay over. Most people would be amazed at just how many people are in tropical/desert uniforms in Alaska. It was very apparent when visiting Wainright. I will say they had a pretty high deployment rate from there. Leave it to Uncle Sam to take a person from one of the coldest duty stations and send them to the desert. quote:
2) A short lay over is never short. True. I wonder if Uncle Sam lives in really long minute world, too. Hurry up and wait until dang it, we're doing it right now, so get yourself in gear. quote:
3) The speed at which your good day will end is directly proportionate to the mood of the first Sargent. MP adds this part "or the level of stupidity of someone you are responsible for under you." My all time favorite of this was the soldier who got bored on guard duty, so he made a youtube video about how easy it was to sneak onto Camp Roberts. I've honestly never understood this level of stupid. At some point or another, somebody must have explained the purpose of guard duty. I guess the guy didn't connect the dots. Yet, it gets funnier. One, the guy really is still in the military. He's an NCO now. Two, a part of his disciplinary sanctions for making the holy grail of dumb during guard duty was to give the guy more guard duty. quote:
4) The battalion commander will pull a surprise 0530 barracks inspection the morning AFTER your unit has spent 5 days on field maneuvers and returned to the barracks after a 15 mile forced march and got back to the barracks at 0330. LOL. I've heard many stories about this kind of thing. quote:
5) If the biscuits are actually soft and edible, they were not made in an Army mess hall. It's my understanding that the Army no longer trains cooks. A lot of it's contracted out now. The people who have to eat the food are way better off. quote:
6) SNAFU, SNARFU and FUBAR all refer to every day operations, and the chaos that goes with it, if none apply, something is very bad is going to happen, the universe does not abide a good day in the military. My personal favorite is FUBAR. The other are the many examples of how the term "military intelligence" is probably the greatest ox y-moron that we will ever have. I can't tell you how many times MP has come home, told me the latest dumb thing that has come along, and any reasonable person doesn't understand how dumb thing X makes sense. quote:
7) Arty will always drop rounds short, arty is both your friend and nightmare. You should know that MP really did laugh at this because he knows exactly what you mean. quote:
8) The air force will always deliver air drops on time, however, it is in their nature to ensure that at least half the drop lands long and ends up IN THE FUCKING TREES. This would worry me. If they are that bad at getting an air drop where it's supposed to go, I'm not all that sure I'd be confident about air support. quote:
9) Forget the image of golden stairs leading to heaven, the stair way to heaven is that wonderful sight of a stacked flight of inbound choppers who are there to take you home. Can't say I blame you for that one. [;)] Oddly enough, one of the most common misconceptions that people have about me is they think I must have, at one time, been an active duty military member. It's incorrect. My father served in Korea, my male off-spring did a contract, and MP's a career man. I doubt I could have done any of those things. To those who have and served honorably, thank you.
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