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ICGsteve -> RE: Labels!! (8/2/2006 12:08:38 AM)
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Oh, goodie, yet another thread on the BDSM communities absolute refusal to define anything. Labels are after all definitions of individuals.
My current theory is that to try and define the BDSM experience would be to level the illusion that what we do corresponds in any way to logic. If we try to define we soon figure out that we can't do it very well, and the only possible reason for that is that we don't know WTF is going on inside of us when we play. For 2000 years logic, logos, has ruled our behavior in the West, it is all we know. We do BDSM as if logic applies, we negotiate, do contracts, have safe-sane guidelines, we write how-to books that are so dry and devoid of life that only a techie could love them.....
But this is all mythos, an acting out of ancient myths, most of which our modern heads not only do not understand but are not even aware exists. Because we don't have any understanding of what we are doing we don't actually have any basis to believe that what we are doing is safe, we don't know if we are sane, and we don't want to admit this. Sure, we could try to have definitions, in making the attempt we would solve a lot of communication problems and head off a lot of pain that is currently caused by our inability to talk efficiently to each other, but the cost would be the illusion that anyone is in control, that we are safe.
Someplace deep down most people understand this, so we collectively come up with a multitude of logical reasons why we can't do definitions, even as we watch so many get hurt as a result. There is no way we are going to get close to this can of worms. Definitions in BDSM, it ain't going to happen.
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