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RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:29:58 PM   
sissifytoserve


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quote:

ORIGINAL: firefey

Quote: I see explotation and weak, petty 8 year old level "all for myself and the hell with the consequenses" mentality here among those who claim to be "dominants".

People who pitifully build themselves up by dumping on others and EXPLOITING their feelings and supressedkarma....only to use it for their own selfish agenda. End Quote.



questions?


Now WHERE did I say "EVERY woman"

......like you claimed?

I think you just WANTED me to say it.

(in reply to firefey)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:36:15 PM   
SubNY278


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While I'm not necessarily defending all that sissytoserve has written, I can attest to his frustration as a fellow male sub.  I think for many subs like me, it's gotten to the point where you've done everything you possibly could.  You take the time to write to each Domme you are interested in with a specific, detailed letter written in response to Her profile.  If you have the opportunity to meet in real-life you always show up, ready and on time.  You don't flake out and don't demand sex or just use Dommes to have something to jerk off to when you're bored.  You have a sincere desire to serve, and the thought of serving is a turn-on for you.  You try all that, and fail, and many times, don't even receive a response from many of the Dommes you write to, even if you write a mature, well-written letter, not pushy, not demanding, not coming out with a laundry list of things the sub enjoys or asking for sex, not copy and pasting the same exact letter over and over again, etc., but a letter that specifically addresses the profile of the Domme being written to.  All that, and nothing to show for it.  So yes, it is frustrating.  Yes, there are many more male subs than female Dommes, but as many Dommes will also admit, many of the letters they do receive from so-called subs are garbage.  Surely, a genuine submissive should stand out?  Except that's often not the case at all.

As far as cross-dressing and generalizations, I think it's even wrong to say that out of, say, 30 cd's, only 1 or 2 "are not like the others."  Have you actually met 30 cd's?  Were they all submissive?  One could be a cd without not even having other submissive desires, or a desire to serve a woman.  Also, just because one enjoys crossdressing doesn't mean that they can't otherwise fit the "alpha male" type that another Domme spoke about earlier.  I for one look like any average male 99% of the time...I don't really have any effeminate mannerisms and besides being a bit shy and reserved (which can be a trait anyone has) and not acting like a disgusting chauvinist pig, there's nothing feminine or unmanly about me in my vanilla life.  I think that the contrast from that into a cross-dressing male submissive is quite striking and can certainly add some excitement to a scene, but again, it is up to the tastes of each specific Domme and sub. 

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
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RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:39:40 PM   
firefey


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you are correct.  you never said the exact words "every woman" however strong the implication may have been.  under that same token, no one here said all cross-dressers.  as much as you might think i want you to have said, every woman here, i think you want to hear every cross-dresser.
 
at this pont who fired the first shot is irellivant as you are in no mood or position to behave in a rational, graceful, thoughtful manner.

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:39:49 PM   
sissifytoserve


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Yeah..I always loved the "Alpha male" MYTH.

I'm the head of my department at work and ex military.

Yet....i'm LESS than a so-called "alpha" male because I have an integrated feminine side.

(in reply to SubNY278)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:43:04 PM   
sissifytoserve


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quote:

ORIGINAL: firefey
....at this pont who fired the first shot is irellivant as you are in no mood or position to behave in a rational, graceful, thoughtful manner.[/size]


Don't even attempt to tell me how I should think/behave ...much less how to be "thoughtful".


Who the hell do you think you are?

(in reply to firefey)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:44:28 PM   
firefey


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SubNY278
As far as cross-dressing and generalizations, I think it's even wrong to say that out of, say, 30 cd's, only 1 or 2 "are not like the others."  Have you actually met 30 cd's?  Were they all submissive?  One could be a cd without not even having other submissive desires, or a desire to serve a woman. 


i did not say, not like the others.  i said "if i meet and know 30 tv's, and 1 or 2 of them are into service, i would say most are not."  essentially what you said in a more susinct manner.  and yes, i have meet roughly 30 cd/tg/tv's.  when i give examples from my own life i try to stay as true to my life as possible.

(in reply to SubNY278)
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RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:52:24 PM   
SubNY278


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Even if you have met 30 cd's and only 1 or 2 of them was into service, I still feel that's a poor generalization, because a cd is not necessarily by definition a submissive, or submissive to women.  And even if there were 30 subs who were cd's or tv's that you've met and only 1 or 2 was into service, that might also be up for debate, in that....would a random group of 30 male subs turn out more than 1 or 2 that are actually into service.  I hear Dommes complaining all the time about the "fake subs" on sites like this, and I don't think every single one of the subs being complained about was a cd or tv. 

That said...

It's interesting that there's no response to the larger question of quality submissives getting lost in the shuffle.

(in reply to firefey)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:55:19 PM   
firefey


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if i could tell you why quality subs get lost in the shuffle, i could probably market it and make a good deal of money.  sadly, i have no answer for you other than get involved with your local bdsm community if and where at all possible.

(in reply to SubNY278)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/17/2006 11:56:00 PM   
sissifytoserve


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Its easier to lump them into the category of..... "Most crossdressers".

Removes the critical thinking and responsibility completely.

(in reply to SubNY278)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:03:27 AM   
Lorelei115


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From: Sin City
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firefey.. hun.. its not worth it... *sigh*

None are so blind as those that refuse to see.

_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:06:41 AM   
sissifytoserve


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Joined: 8/30/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115



None are so blind as those that refuse to see.


You got THAT right.

(in reply to Lorelei115)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:15:06 AM   
SaphireLynn


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Joined: 2/15/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

Friendly or exploitive ONE SIDED relationships?

Aren't you a "female supremacist"? "Superior" to us?

We are "LESSERS" to you.... aren't we.? At least you are foolish enough to think so.

You can rationalize your ridiculous, unfounded, supremacist comments all you want. MOST crossdressers tend to be very GIVING and LOVING....and they tend to get S**t on..a LOT.

If anyone is "all about themselves" its people who think they are BETTER than you.

THATS THE REAL DEAL.


I will NEVER serve someone who looks at me as a "lesser".

Best be careful who you play with..you never know.




Well that is why you will never have a Domme for you to serve... your attitude sucks you are here for Our pleasure... Now there should be a common interests to make it work, but your submission is a must. you seem to be to be one of those...."look at Me I am coming out of the closet" and angry you was there subbies. you have been hurt in the past and now have taken it out on Us... Just because We believe We are supeior to you does not mean We are Female Supremists, because that is totaly wrong on My account. Now I believe I am Superior to Mine, but as a race no All Women are not Superior to All Men that is a Supremists...

_____________________________

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But he that dares not grasp the thorn
Should never crave the rose.
~~~Anne Bronte~~~
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:18:52 AM   
Lorelei115


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Ya know, this has turned into a really in depth thread from an OP that was basically posting a profile... *shrug* strange how things happen.

_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:20:20 AM   
sissifytoserve


Posts: 1016
Joined: 8/30/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SaphireLynn




Well that is why you will never have a Domme for you to serve... your attitude sucks you are here for Our pleasure... Now there should be a common interests to make it work, but your submission is a must. you seem to be to be one of those...."look at Me I am coming out of the closet" and angry you was there subbies. you have been hurt in the past and now have taken it out on Us... Just because We believe We are supeior to you does not mean We are Female Supremists, because that is totaly wrong on My account. Now I believe I am Superior to Mine, but as a race no All Women are not Superior to All Men that is a Supremists...


Iam here to please a dominant who CARES about me. Period. Nothing more...nothing less. I wont be exploited by someone who is only out for themselves.

ESPECIALLY one who thinks they are "superior".

BTW..ive been alone for YEARS....I can go a little longer. No sweat off of my back.

How many days...hours weeks have you passed time by yourself?

I have the strength to be alone with myself. Ive had to. How about you?

< Message edited by sissifytoserve -- 9/18/2006 12:23:30 AM >

(in reply to SaphireLynn)
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RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:22:22 AM   
mam


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I like crossdressers, and sissys. I think they like me also. I find them beautiful and interesting, lovely and sexy. I am not bi, so I guess that makes me even a stranger bird.
I am sadistic tho and I do enjoy spankings. But they know this and accept it, or enjoy it also. If I misuse or mistreat anyone they always have the option to leave.
I believe sub/slaves are special jewels to be cherished and I hope I always think that way.

(in reply to Lorelei115)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:36:58 AM   
tasha_tart


Posts: 385
Joined: 2/20/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
To reply to the OP's heading, if not the body of the post...some do...some don't...some take it case by case.  It is no different than any other preference.
 
And to no one poster in particular...what people post here are opinions...try not to get so worked up over them.  If someone is not into crossdressing, or any other thing that you are...they aren't into it....that's life...get over it.
 
If someone says they've found something to be a certain way in his/her personal experience...why argue?  You have not shared that particular set of experiences.
 
I'm a CD, but I try really hard (and usually successfully) to avoid hissy fits when someone...Dom/me, sub, or otherwise...says he or she isn't into/doesn't get/dislikes crossdressing.  I probably am not into/don't get/dislike some of the things that they're into.  If you spend all your energy whining at people who aren't interested in you, you accomplish a couple of things...you burn way too much energy uselessly...and you make yourself look bad.
 
BTW...I agree that for many...not most, not all...but many CDs the dressing, the makeup, the clothes are what it's all about for them.  Nothing wrong with that...but it is not likely to be easy to find someone to share that obsession...just as it would be hard to find someone to share any obsession, if it excludes their needs.
 
A couple more cents before I go...for subs who wonder why "it's all about the Dom/me?"...one word..."DUH!"  That is kind of the dynamic of the whole thing...of course, most people want something back from any relationship...just as most people are willing to put that back into the relationship.  A total obsession with one's own interests, to the exclusion of the other's needs (see obsessed CDs above) is not for everyone...but really...if you're actually a sub, you don't need to wonder why you're supposed to put the Dom/me's interests first in most cases.
 
Tasha (writing under the influence of yummy Nicaraguan (sp?) rum)

_____________________________


"Sex without love is an empty experience. But as empty experiences go, it's one of the better ones."...Woody Allen

(in reply to subTVjean)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:51:18 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

quote:

ORIGINAL: lunamor

I find most cross-dressers and TVs and trans-genders are caught up in themselves rather than service.


Sissytoserve, we're not saying ALL but we are saying MOST. And as Doms we are probably in a better position to observe CDs, TVs and TGs in action than you are!

Lunamor






You have NO idea what really goes on in the mind of a crossdresser...WHATSOEVER....don't be so arrogant to assume so.

Well guess what...mabye some us don't WANT to serve you because of how ABUSIVE you are towards US?

You know what? DON'T seek a sissy...do US a favor. Take your superiority complex elsewhere. We're more than just "decorotive..and useful" so piss off.

WE aren't WAL-Mart to trim your damn tree. Treat me like an object and I will DAMN well get IN YOUR FACE!!

You exploitive USERS need to have your stuff handed to you...before you HURT someone else.

Signed...

Angry

I'm sorry, but this is one of the reasons we, meaning the folks who don't get into fetishists and CDs, think ya'll are nutters.  Going bonkers at someone because they have had experiences to base an opinion on is really immature.  I too have had mainly crappy experiences with CDs (and fetishists).  Do I still have some that are friends of mine?  Yes. (Along with adult babies and other very finite fetishists)  But, all in all, it's not my thing, and it's exactly for the reasons that this other poster referred to -- focus on their kink over what everyone else wants or cares about really leaves a bad taste in my mouth as a dominant.  Perhaps if the CDs approached and admitted that they're not interested in BEING submissive and that they want to 'be a girl' with me, I'd be more apt to deal with that. 

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:53:48 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sissifytoserve

People who pitifully build themselves up by dumping on others and EXPLOITING their feelings and supressedkarma....only to use it for their own selfish agenda.

Its rotten.

This all comes from the girl who touts herself as a "friendly, down to earth submissive."  Uhhhh....yeah. 

Back to what you said, your suggestion is a bitter pill that you'd best swallow yourself!  Your behavior here to perfect strangers who are just DISCUSSING a topic, not judging you or sentencing you to death (or something equally horrible) has been absolutely atrocious and YOU yourself are dumping your emotional baggage everywhere.  Seems there was alot of rage in that closet you kept yourself in.....and I'm sorry for that, but it's not OUR fault that you're angry.

< Message edited by MisPandora -- 9/18/2006 12:57:12 AM >


_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to sissifytoserve)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 12:56:41 AM   
FelinePersuasion


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I can agree with that Mis Pandora, it'd be better  if people said strait up their hope an then you can say no or yes based on honest expectaions.

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Do Mistresses like Cross-Dressers ? - 9/18/2006 1:03:55 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SubNY278
As far as cross-dressing and generalizations, I think it's even wrong to say that out of, say, 30 cd's, only 1 or 2 "are not like the others."  Have you actually met 30 cd's?  Were they all submissive?  One could be a cd without not even having other submissive desires, or a desire to serve a woman.  Also, just because one enjoys crossdressing doesn't mean that they can't otherwise fit the "alpha male" type that another Domme spoke about earlier.  I for one look like any average male 99% of the time...I don't really have any effeminate mannerisms and besides being a bit shy and reserved (which can be a trait anyone has) and not acting like a disgusting chauvinist pig, there's nothing feminine or unmanly about me in my vanilla life.  I think that the contrast from that into a cross-dressing male submissive is quite striking and can certainly add some excitement to a scene, but again, it is up to the tastes of each specific Domme and sub. 


Yes, I've met well over 100 CDs.  And yes, I can say that about 10 percent of them were submissive.  The rest were into their fantasy game of dress up and when they were done putting their make up and wig on and showing off (and getting off) it was all over.  And that's ok....so long as they're up front about it!  It's again, just not my thing.  You may ask how I've met all of these folks?  I teach within the BDSM/leather/fetish communities.  I'm a former prodom, and I managed a large fetish shop frequented by CDs and vended at fet events all over the country.  So, over 11 years, I'd say I've had more contact with CDs than many women.  It's just not my thing!

I'm not sure there was anyone saying that they didn't think a CD could be masculine outside of their preferred scene.......

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to SubNY278)
Profile   Post #: 60
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