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why cant they leave the baggage behind


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why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 4:33:47 AM   
naughtyafterdark


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/19/2005
Status: offline 		greetings Masters and slaves
this one has not posted before and prays she does not offend anyone but here goes,
raised in an M/s household one of seven girl children she watched her Father struggle to protect, provide, and love all of us and his pride possession, my mother who was a true slave served him whole hearted and with visible pride, that being said here is my question

each gorean Master this girl has met realtime and online seems to be suspious and less than honest, please no disrespect intended, it is just something i have encountered, while i am honest to answer all questions, these "Masters" who undoubtedly have self doubts of their own, bring forward instances that occured while they were either courting or living with a previous girl.
While as a slave we work hard to learn the intricate weaving and mind  of a Master before we beg collar, why do they not delve deep into our souls getting to know us, too many times they feel each slave is the same, yet as humans are we not unique in our own rights as they are,,
for me it has been terribly challanging for i am not like anyone else, just as the Masters are unique in their own rights, is it wrong that i do not wish to be saddled with a predecessors baggage or be unjustifyibly accused of something because a response seems simular to the one before who acted poorly, it was my impression this life choice was based on trust, perhaps i am barking up the wrong tree

with the uptmost respect to all
naughty
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 5:54:47 AM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		greetings,

this girl hasn't found any relationship any where that both parties don't carry baggage.

some just keep it hidden better than others or for longer periods of time.

It is part of being human and living in this wonderful dysfunctional world.

Some of this baggage lets the 'free' know what they will and will not tolerate in a slave and they're expression of such may just be that if it is masters that you are getting to know or it may be whatever he wants it to be, if you are his slave, you deal with it.

Sure this one has days where she thinks 'gee I wish Master didnt feel that way ' or 'man i wish he didnt do that'
but ya know...those thoughts better leave real quick or she needs to find an acceptable, respectful way to bring up how it makes her feel.
Master has the choose to listen or not, or say' too bad girl, buck up, thats life as my slave'.

if its not causing physical or emotional harm to a girl ,
he may not give a rats ass about having baggage, then again, he is the free and has the choose to carry baggage,if he wants to.

as to getting  to know your soul, probably a good bit of that comes with time just like any other relationship.....nothing that deep or intimate happens overnight.

no one said being a kajira was easy, yeah there;s days its hard as hell but

we conform to that
if we choose to be slave.

May she wish you well



_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 6:13:21 AM   
naughtyafterdark


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/19/2005
Status: offline 		greetings fyre
and thank You, has been a long time since this ones Master passed and has had to search her soul as well as anothers, Your words inspired me to look deep within and gain the strength to continue

with thanks and gratitude

respectfully naughty

(in reply to fyreredsub)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 7:37:17 AM   
lakewoodkajira


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline 		Greetings Masters,
Greetings Mistresses,
Greetings slaves,

  As this girl has posted before, everyone here has baggage.  Even if you lived in a bubble you would have baggage.  JN made it easy in his books, leave Earth behind along with family, kids, work etc and live on Gor. Unfortunately it really doesn't work that way.  A Master on Gor could throw undesirable slaves to the urts, sell her or just kill her.  Not here.

   A Master will certainly have baggage, from his upbringing to present adult experiences.  If he is an experienced Master he will have had some experience with slaves, he has baggage.  Some baggage is good. Experiences in how to train a slave, knowing what his needs are and what will fit within his homestone.  Experience gives us guidelines so that we know what we want and what we can deal with.  When a Master looks at a new slave,  he must be able to judge and know what he can handle, for responsiblity and honor are a must.  Without his baggage how would he know what he can handle.  Now for the dark side.  Having bad experiences gives a person hesitation to start anew.  If a Master has been burned by a slave that leaves without cause, steals or turns to drugs,  then bringing a new  in can be nerve racking.  He may be slower at getting close to his slave, he may place stronger rules and stricter punishments to test a new slave and to save his heart.

   Now  a slave with baggage.   We are not on Gor, we have baggage.  From adolescents to now.  Bad relationships, kids, medical problems and possible abuse.  What do we do with these?  She may fear or doesn't trust. Her kids may take up a huge chunk of her time, thoughts, and resources (personal experience).  She has seen slaves who try, but can not give up thier safety nets and commit fully, wasting 2 years of her and Masters time, causing pain to all involved.   Honesty and communication is a must between owned and Free.  It is not easy to reveal your soul to someone, it requires trust.  Sometime that is a must in a Master/slave relationship.  Now granted, the Free have the right to keep whatever they choose from the enslaved,  maybe not a good thing, but thier right.  Slaves have to give it up, all fears, desires and worries. Informing a persective Master or present Master is a must, how will he know if he can take on that responsiblity and be able to handle it if he is not well informed.

  Now, thats all good in theory.  The reality is some, including this girl, have not looked deeply into thier past and the hurts that go with it and she will assume that this may be true for most, unless you are heavy into professional theraphy.  Crap always pops up when you least expect it.  Communication is the key, telling your fears, your bad experiences, and having the bravery to believe you will not be released by your Master.

    Everyone has baggage, but this girl calls it history,  everyone must deal with thier baggage, and when you go into a relationship bare it all.  It can do no good to hid it( this girl still has not bared it all, she works at it).   No relationship can work and grow if things are kept hidden.   As far as a Master having baggage.  Slave learn from it!.  Know what his likes are and dislikes,  just because he is a Master does not mean he has not been wounded or that he does not feel.  If he has been hurt by past slaves, listen, learn where not to tread, what has made him happy etc.

        Respectfully kira(Omega)

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 8:10:39 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 37484
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Well, I guess my question would be whether or not you have a comprehensive survey of Masters who may or may not claim Gorean,  for the most part, I think that some of the first things women who advertise slave are going to deal with is the scum that rises to the top of the boiling waters. This does not devine the future.

As you want men to leave behind past difficult situations and see you with fresh and unjaundiced eye; I wonder what baggage you carry with you day to day?

Curiously,
Ron 

_____________________________

Kam Fong as Chin Ho

For in the final analysis, our most basic common link, is that we all inhabit this small planet, we all breathe the same air, we all cherish our children's futures, and we are all mortal. JFK



(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 10:26:26 AM   
Malkinius


Posts: 1584
Joined: 1/9/2004
Status: offline 		greetings naughty....

quote:

ORIGINAL: naughtyafterdark
greetings Masters and slaves

this one has not posted before and prays she does not offend anyone but here goes,

raised in an M/s household one of seven girl children she watched her Father struggle to protect, provide, and love all of us and his pride possession, my mother who was a true slave served him whole hearted and with visible pride, that being said here is my question

each gorean Master this girl has met realtime and online seems to be suspious and less than honest, please no disrespect intended, it is just something i have encountered, while i am honest to answer all questions, these "Masters" who undoubtedly have self doubts of their own, bring forward instances that occured while they were either courting or living with a previous girl.

If you are finding men who are less than honest as you put it, that should be a good reason to stay away. It doesn't matter who or what they claim to be. A good Master will delve into you, your mind and your history before seriously considering collaring you. All of us have indulged in the "How would that person be as a Master/slave for me?" thoughts and questions. Most of the time we know very easily it is not going to happen or they are not someone we would want to have as a Master or a slave.


quote:

While as a slave we work hard to learn the intricate weaving and mind  of a Master before we beg collar, why do they not delve deep into our souls getting to know us, too many times they feel each slave is the same, yet as humans are we not unique in our own rights as they are,,

As I said, the good ones do. The best can, as I once put it, 'read the spaces between your words' and learn about you. I certainly learn almost as much about a slave from what a girl doesn't say as from what she does say.


quote:

for me it has been terribly challanging for i am not like anyone else, just as the Masters are unique in their own rights, is it wrong that i do not wish to be saddled with a predecessors baggage or be unjustifyibly accused of something because a response seems simular to the one before who acted poorly, it was my impression this life choice was based on trust, perhaps i am barking up the wrong tree

Maybe you are just shaking loose the wrong nuts? Yes, we all have baggage, history or whatever you want to call it. Yes, we do want some of it known to a prospective Master/slave before the collar goes on. There will always be things that come up later that were just not thought of or gotten around to after collaring. Hopefully...they are not the big ones. "Oh yeah, by the way I have 14 children from six former wives and child support is one and a half times what I make right now, but that is ok as I don't pay any of it anyway." That is not a comment you want to hear AFTER you are collared to someone. I am not sure you want to hear it before, either.


quote:

with the uptmost respect to all

naughty


be well girl....

Malkinius

_____________________________

A questioner by inclination...An Auctioneer for the fun of it
http://www.HouseMalkinius.com The goal is beauty.

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/13/2006 4:01:54 PM   
ShreveportMaster


Posts: 898
Joined: 10/6/2004
From: Dallas, Tx
Status: offline 		 ROTFL! 14 kids by 6 wives eh? Obviously this fellow ran out of slave wine  
naughty, don't despair, you'll find plenty of nut jobs here, and everywhere else who claim to be Gorean, but who would not know the Philosophy if someone whopped them upside the head with it. you'll also find that all too often a Master can wind up getting screwed over by a so-called "kajira" and as such tend to be a bit wary. This is also normal. Sadly, so many girls come to Gor only after being put through the wringer of the BDSM world, often severely scarred mentally, emotionally, and even physically, or they were never involved in BDSM, but were the prey of just plain old abusive males who see their need to please as something that can be exploited, and used to keep them there while they get their twisted jollies beating them down physically and mentally. Often these girls are so screwed up by the time they finally find Gor that some are beyond remedy, and act in irrational and sometimes psychotic fashion, thinking, by this time, that abuse is normal, and since they are not being abused, that their Master must not care for them, and acting out accordingly. I know of those who have tried to help nurture those, to no avail. in fact, been there, done that.
Keep the faith luv, Good Ones exist, in both genders... they are out there.

                                                                          I wish you well,
                                                                                                    Shreve

                            

_____________________________

"And to sooth the Bosk, there was found a Singing Cowboy. To soothe the Cowboy, a kajira is needed."

Riders of Gor
Book 37, Pg 298 ;-)

(in reply to Malkinius)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/14/2006 3:24:46 AM   
noyeh


Posts: 501
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline 		Greetings Masters, Mistresses and fellow slaves,

Everyone has bagagge. I don't care who they are . Be it the Free or slaves. Life is tough and everyone of Us out there has been done badly at one time or another. There is nothing we can do about that. The only thing that we can do to lessen the blow of this baggage is to sit down and talk about it with each other. Communication is the key to making it easier. We as slaves should be open books to Our Owners. They should know everything about us including our skeletons in the closet. Anything that goes on in my life before and in the future is always known to my Master.

I think that if every slave sat down or Free sat down and talked with those of their household and talked about what is going on, then the stress and emotions would lesson and become more positive. All we can do is set a example to those around us by talking about it. Talking is good therapy for anyone. And if talking at home can't help that person then maybe they need professional help from a therapist.

Life is full of challenges if we did not have challenges then life would be rather dull. I embrace challenges because that is what builds up self esteem and character. Embrace it and go with the flow consider each struggle a life lesson and teach others how to deal with it best. Find a way. Master and I have our ups and downs but We don't let that stop Us from being a team. We get things done.

Look at the baggage as a positive tool instead of a negative one that nobody wants. That is why being a kajira is hard and the saying goes "that the training never ends when Your a kajira/slave."

BTW if that baggage happens to be Your Masters children , You should treat them as Your own and embrace that you have more of Him to love. If You can't handle kids then You need to explore and find a Master that does not have any or want any. As for me, my Master has 4 lovely children and I love each and everyone of them as if they where my own. Why? Because they are a part of Him and where made by him. A child does not ask to be born. So how could I not love them.

< Message edited by noyeh -- 10/14/2006 3:30:35 AM >

_____________________________

personal slave of Master Jeff the Seeker
His property slave slut and pet
His concubine/first girl of the House of the Seeker

noyeh-JtS-fg

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/14/2006 8:16:59 AM   
mCBfg


Posts: 26
Joined: 7/5/2006
Status: offline 		a slave does carry baggage with them wherever they go. when it seems that a slave wears the "velcro collar" and roams from Master to Master what does the slave think of what others think of her? m has seen this happen many many times,,,,and slaves get offended at times when they are thoughtof as by others as a players...but the actions whether intentioal or not,do speak loudly as to how others think of them, if that is what some of the baggage is, then one has to find a way to lighten the load or just not care what others think of them .
all of us have some baggage with us, that is a given in any type of new relatioship.

m

_____________________________

What thrills you, " I said, "is not the whip, not the iron, not the pain, but masculine domination. It is that to which you, unknown to yourself, are responding. ~~ Tribesmen of Gor, pg 360 ~~

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/17/2006 3:34:13 PM   
naughtyafterdark


Posts: 20
Joined: 10/19/2005
Status: offline 		Master Ron
well spoken and thought provoking, in hindsight we all have some baggage, perhaps it is how we chose to use it or dislay it is that would be the key, and yes this one knows many Masters from her community who have helped her grow emotionally, and for every good one, there are many who think this is only a game, for me it is a life choice not a lifestyle and that could be where i make  errors  in judgement of others

to all who responded, thank You  both Masters and slaves Your words have been most enlightening

with humility and respect
naughty

(in reply to mCBfg)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/17/2006 4:57:56 PM   
KajiraResources


Posts: 177
Joined: 1/28/2006
Status: offline 		noyeh

Being you are the first slave to make me blush in a long time, I have a question for you to ponder.

How many Masters have the need to save a girl from herself so they are actually more attracted to the extra baggage?  Sort of a hero complex.

Just curious 

_____________________________

Colorado's Home Stone

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/coloradohomestone/

"Do not ask the wise man how to live, for if he knows, he will know he cannot tell you. If you would learn how to live, do not ask how to live but, instead, proceed to do so

(in reply to noyeh)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: why cant they leave the baggage behind - 10/18/2006 12:48:34 PM   
Camerius


Posts: 742
Joined: 9/5/2006
Status: offline 		Most of what I have seen and talked to of females that claimes to be a slave, is, when all comes to all, NOT what I want to have as a slave from the first reasons as to them being BDSM sub princesses, many of the type that you find here in this place.

I have been fortunate enough too to have met a very few  slaves that ARE slaves, and lives as such, but as with good masters that slaves seeks, they too are very few and very far between, but they do excist as they're part of natures design, just as the opposit are, the hard question is where to find them.

As we all know, it's easy to claim something but harder when the shots are called forth to be proven, and that's where a lot falls on their faces, and sometimes too, asses. What was said wasn't ment as such or it got twisted and was never ment to be understood in that way that it was, you know the drill.

If you put on that lable of being a self-identified slave, then I will treat you as such, whether you like it or not, and that comes from me haveing experienced the same from others before and probably will do so again multiple times yet to come, besides me seeing that as the right way to treat a slave.

That is what is part of haveing baggage too is part of, that of have become smarter and wiser from past inter-relations that have turned out bad or just fizzed out, and as such more awareness have developed
about what you say and what you want from the person in question.

There's nothing wrong with asking questions at all, infact the more asked the better, as that will uncover both what is behind the persons mind and thought besides too get to the core of the central one, that of  "IS person X the likely master/slave that I want to have?", and even tho you, as a slave might have many fine qualities, skills and so on, you might simply not be the kind of slave I would want in my home, just like the opposit could be possible as to personal chemistry and so on.

I myself as I said have talked with multiple so called slaves, only to find out that what they demanded ( yes demanded /grins ) was not what i would give to a slave, as I see the master/slave thing in bit of another direction than they did and therefor chose to turn them down, which is my right, just as it is for a slave to say no to become a mans slave.

So yes, there's baggage, and sometimes it's for the better that it's there as that's one of the best filters there is for makeing a choice that in the end might bind a person to your life....and who would walk into that with no baggage at all?


Be well

  Camerius




Edit: A few misspelled words.



< Message edited by Camerius -- 10/18/2006 12:57:20 PM >

(in reply to naughtyafterdark)
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