RE: Compromise

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Compromise

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Compromise

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Compromise - 11/7/2006 9:08:01 AM

stockingluvr54

Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I get everything I want because I don't settle :)

People settle when they think they can't really get what they want. I think I've learned that, when it comes to choosing who you spend your life with as an intimate partner, you can get everything you want, and more.

Me either!

Settling just does not work out in the long run. Eventually you will long for those things you really want or need.

Compromising on some issues is fine and happens even in vanilla relationships, but never ever settle for less than you want.

Well said Twice.....!!!!!!!

(in reply to twicehappy)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Compromise - 11/7/2006 9:40:06 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

How can you compromise and not compromise yourself ? Compromising and settling is the same. The thing about putting a question out is that you have to wait to see how it is being precieved by others. It seems that most of us have high expectations from the start. As time passes some are willing to lower their expectations and compromise and settle for little less.

For me, there is a difference between what I want and what I need. I want daily contact from my slaves. In truth, I only need contact about every 3 days. So, I'm willing to compromise the daily contact if it's truly a challenge for the slave to do so (such as, they're in the military overseas). I have not compromised my need (which is a boundary condition or, as some say, a deal breaker).

One reason we are willing to "settle" over time is that we learn that, often, our expectations weren't necessarily "high" as "unrealistic". It's really unrealistic to want your slave to be in 5" heels 24/7 if you also want them to mow the lawn with the push mower. However, it's slightly more realistic that they wear 5" heels whenever they are in the house. But, you might find that you don't NEED them to wear 5" heels expect when you're out in kink public.

Figuring out the difference between realistic and unrealistic wants, as well as the difference between wants and needs, is part of the journey. Those that pay attention will figure it out. Those who do not will sit and wonder WHY they can't find that person to mow in heels.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Compromise - 11/7/2006 10:43:00 AM

liks2plzlf

Posts: 390
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline

I totally agree with MasterFireMaam. Settling for, or comprising, I always considered it to mean things of a minor nature not anything that was really important. As I get older, I find I will settlefor/compromise on many things, but not the really important ones. To serve some Dominas, now I might even mow the lawn in high heels.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Profile

Post #: 23