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Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 2:20:22 AM

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Mike Tyson, even though he was probably genetically gifted, wouldn't have been tough enough to become champion if he hadn't been beaten up many times, both in juvenile detention and during sparring. Analagously Sub guys tend, on average to be very successful in their day to day lives (look at all the Sub politicians, CEOs etc.).

Do people here think that being a Sub has made you stronger and more confident in your day to day life? Do you think that even before you got into the lifestyle the genes that made you a Sub also gave you an inner toughness? It'd be great to hear some guys' opinion on this as well to look for contrasts, 90% of the answers here are from girls.

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 2:38:45 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlexAussieSub
Do people here think that being a Sub has made you stronger and more confident in your day to day life? Do you think that even before you got into the lifestyle the genes that made you a Sub also gave you an inner toughness? It'd be great to hear some guys' opinion on this as well to look for contrasts, 90% of the answers here are from girls.

Well I am not a guy, but I could deepen my voice while I type this if it helps?

I dont think being sub has made me stronger, it has made me feel free, which in itself brings confidence. The second question I cant answer, cos I dont believe I have an inner toughness.

_____________________________

Happiness does not find us, we must go out and find it for ourselves.

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 2:47:52 AM

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Interesting to hear your reply. I want to hear girls opinions here too, I just asked for guys because they never seem to post here.

Alex

(in reply to SamKeithsslave)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 3:15:21 AM

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I don't think it gave me confidence in my every day life (didn't need it there) but it certainly gave me more confidence in my place within relationship and that's indeed a strength.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 3:51:10 AM

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My thinking is that I am a strong, capable, insightful person but those qualities only come to the fore when I'm in a subordinate position in any given relationship in nearly all areas of life (the one exception to this is with my kids). Being a submisssive doesn't make me strong, but points to the conditions under which those strengths can emerge.

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 3:57:02 AM

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I don't think so. I have other opinions as to why I am a submissive. Once I discovered this part of me, it became clear to me that I had always had the tendencies to submit, but never acted upon them until about 10 years ago. It explained to me why I have always put friend's needs before my own. What I mean is, I would take the time to help a friend, especially females, and let things I should be doing for myself go. I have always had a hard time saying "NO" to a friend that needed my help or time for whatever reason. I look at that as being a bad trait, not a good one. But still, it was service to another. Yes, I admit, some friends and acquaintances took advantage of my abilities and eagerness to help out.
Being stronger or more confident does not even enter into how I have changed since embracing my desire, need and participation in a loving D/s relationship. I have always considered myself strong and confident; complete with a healthy ego. OK, maybe some things in my life made me feel less confident or weaker. Like the fact that I am a cross dresser. That makes you question your strength as a man for sure. And my confidence was always zapped when it came to simply buying feminine clothes for myself for fear of discovery. Odd, had no problem shopping for those things at Christmas time or Valentines day....So confidence was it's normal high. lol But that is another story.
As for inner toughness...I have had to be tough since being orphaned at age 16 and thrust out in the world to fend for myself. My inner toughness came to me through my mother; A woman that raised 5 kids on a very limited income after my Dad died when I was 10. What she did, how she did it is also perhaps why I feel women are superior to men in many ways. She was one tough, strong lady. One so full of love and devotion even through the hard times. So maybe it is what I saw my mother accomplish and what she did to keep us kids clothed, housed and fed that makes me want to serve one deserving woman. It might also be part of the reason that I became a cross dresser at age 10-11. I so admired my mother and other women in my life that I wanted to be more like them.
So here I am at age 57, a proud male, so honored and thankful, to be in service to one beautiful strong confident woman, I am strong enough, tough enough, and confident enough to be proud to do all I can to please her and put Her wants, needs and desires before my own. If I can accomplish those things, i will remain one very happy proud submissive man for the rest of my life.
I hope this long response answered your questions. Or at least gave you some insight as to why some of us males so revere, admire, adore and respect women that we want to serve them.

_____________________________

"Don't make someone a priority in your life, When you're only an option in theirs"

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 4:35:25 AM

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No I don't think being a sub has made me stronger in other parts of life. I have had a constant struggle in life due to other things which made me fight for what I wanted and where I am.

Many ceo's like to submit as they got all this pressure on them at work the enjoy not being in control for a few hours.

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 4:56:38 AM

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I have always been a very strong willed person; becoming a slave did nothing more than increase that

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 5:06:16 AM

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I do not think it makes me stronger. I was a strong person to begin with. It certainly did give me more confidence and pride in myself. I think that depends also on the person you are with. I think you draw strength from each other and grow.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 5:51:53 AM

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Living a life ith Integrity(defined as living a life where the various aspects are integrated honestly) I would say is what makes the person stronger whether it be through dominance or submission. I would attribute the success people gain is much more due to the fact that they are not wasteing their energy fighting internal battles trying to be something they are not.

Once you have determined who you are and what you are about and what fullfills you and you have found the way to integrate all those things into a life then success in the rest of life would tend to come much easier.

Opinion worth exactly what you paid me for it

Archer

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 6:07:14 AM

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I say YES being a sub has definately made me stronger! I also have always been strong willed, confidant, and dedicated to succeeding. There was always a part of me that was so very different from "normal", that needed to be hidden away. Until I found the ability to embrace that part, relish in it, expose it (I did a lot of public scening in NYC so it was VERY exposed!), and let go. "Let go" to allow myself to float proudly in that mystical magical ""subspace". I have never felt more whole, proud, beautiful, competent and loved. That in turn permeated all of me and tunrned the "hidden" part into just plain part of me and when one leg on a table that was wobbly gets strengthened the entire table is strengthened.

_____________________________

Don't forget to smile while you're chasing down your dream!

(in reply to Archer)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 6:40:58 AM

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I was born the person I am todya. While society has molded me in certain ways I don't believe being a submissive has made me any stronger than whatever I was going to be anyway.

I do know, while growing up and seeing my sister and mother in abusive situations I did fight who I was for many years. I wanted to be self sufficient and never need anyone to do anything for me.
I achieved that goal. It did make an impression on who I am. However, I don't know if I would call it strength.
Even if I had not seen them in the situations they were in I believe I would still be who I was. I think I would be less apt to dismiss people so rapidly though. I may be able to cope with them a bit better.
At this point in my life I just don't need peoples drama. I'd prefer a person be real or I have little use for them. I'm thinking that may not be part of me if I had not grown up in the situation I had.

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 7:55:27 AM

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talk about feel strong or weak when u be sub or slaves to someone ... time make me be more strong urges to be free ...... i am free bird i fly n move in my own though that make more storngerst beccause when i fall there no one told me what is going on i had recover my pain by my self ..... of couse when u recover certain thing by u own u learn something about what happen ....................

(in reply to sub4hire)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 8:21:22 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlexAussieSub
...Do people here think that being a Sub has made you stronger and more confident in your day to day life?...

being it, no. embracing it, yes.

this slave does not believe being a sub makes one "more" or "less" confident, weak, depressed, sexy, smart, strong, impressionable, ignorant, desirable or ______________(insert favorite adjective here).

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 8:27:22 AM

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I don't think so. I'm more confident in my relationship because I'm with a man who appreciates me submitting to him, as opposed to a vanilla who just got used to taking and taking and never giving anything back.

But in general I think I'm less confident because for the first time in my life I have someone I can turn to when in trouble, and in fact who sees when I'm getting into trouble, and then takes over. I no longer am responsible for everything.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 8:28:39 AM

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Being true to yourself and having the courage to act towards expressing who you are is what makes you stronger.

Being a sub or slave doesn't mean anything other than that you are a sub or slave.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Celeste43)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 9:05:24 AM

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It has made me more confident in my life. I know what I am. I am a woman who believes in putting her man before herself at almost all times (I'm still in school, sometimes I have to come first). Knowing what I am has cut down on my need to explore my sexuality with mutiple partners since now the questions I need answers are the ones relating to my submissive nature outside of the bedroom. In turn, being able to stay with one partner happily has boosted my self-confidence and makes me more able to handle the things the world throws at me.

So I guess in weird way, if we define self-confidence as personal strength, then it has maybe me stronger... or maybe I'm just nutty!

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 9:26:33 AM

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Being a slave has had a profound affect on me. Prior to this my life was comprised of protecting myself - "acting strong" but inside i've always been very sensitive with a strong desire to please. What i thought was strength before i've realized was armor, but that's just me. i will always have the real strengths i possess. i see being tough and being strong as 2 different things.

_____________________________

She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.
slave to love - - Chairman's maia

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 11:00:44 AM

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Quik Reply

Being His sub has not made me stronger i had to be strong to submit to begin with. It has however, made me happier and more confident. It has not made me stronger but has just enhanced my life.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to slavemaia)

RE: Does being a Sub/Slave make you a stronger person? - 11/15/2006 11:07:17 AM

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From: Nashville, TN
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Being a slave does not make someone stronger, nor does it make them weaker. Answering for my boy as I so often do, the things he went through during his life before the acceptance of his position of slave are what has made him who he is now. Those events made him strong, and he brings that strength into the relationship with him. I have met other slaves, male and female, who's past has made them weak and needy.
I have known slaves that were stronger than the Doms I know, both seasonsed and rookies. Some hadnt been in the lifestyle for long enough for their slave sttus to have impacted their strenght since they hadnt been through anything as of yet.

Hope that explains a bit
DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to littleone35)

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