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Cuckolding - 5/20/2004 5:50:55 PM   
iolanthe


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What is it?
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RE: Cuckolding - 5/20/2004 6:00:17 PM   
iwillserveu


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Your wife and some other guy having sex.

King Arthur was cuckolded by Lancelot an Gwenivere. (Yeah, they were dominant.)

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RE: Cuckolding - 5/20/2004 8:21:04 PM   
inyouagain


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Cuckolding is the process of the male half of a partnership not being able to sexually perform (whether the cause is mental or physical), and the sexual needs of the female half of the relationship (whether wife or or not, could be a girlfriend) are taken care of by a surrogate male, usually a Dom. Cuckolding is basically a humiliation process, and cuckold Doms often have sex with the female, in front of the incapable male partner, and the incapable male partner is often responsible for creampie cleanup.

Cuckolding is more prevalent in relationships where theer is a huge disparity in the ages of the male and female. When a 20 year old female marries or hooks up with an older man (often a wealthy older man), there usually comes a point in time that the older male can't get it up anymore, and the needs of the female are addressed by a cuckold Dom who sexually services the female, usually in the presence of the incapable older male. This is a lifestyle preference to mere adultry, wher the female gets her sex when and where she can find it... on her own. Cuckolding is distinguished by the presence and obvious humuliation of the older male, who often pays for the cuckolding... and then cleans up the creampie.

It is more prevalent in age disparity couples, as not too many cuckold Doms are eager to go have sex with a 78 year old woman in front of her 79 year old husband/mate. It is more often like a 79 year old man with a 20ish-30ish-40ish year old wife/mate. Cuckolding more commonly involves attractive and younger females, being sexually serviced in front of their elderly (or mentally/physically incapable) mates/husbands/boyfriends.

Cuckolding is lifestyle related, and sometimes may not involve sex, but usually involves acts of submission by the female half... to a Cuckold Dom. I don't know what the Domme equivalent of cuckolding is, but I'm sure it exists via incapable or disinterested female halves, as a measure to ensure submission or sex for the other half, the male. Cuckolding is not simply infidelity, or screwing around... it usually involves humiliation.

As far as King Arthur, I'd say it was Gwenivere who chose the affairs with Lancelot, and not Arthur. Also, I think Lancelot/Gwenivere liaisons were essentially covert, the sex was done in private, as they could steal away... and not in front of Arthur, and the King subsequently performing creampie cleanup. Their "affair" was just that... an affair, but a long lived affair, and not necessarily a good example of the lifestyle concept of cuckolding, or it's application in general lifestyle terms.

Modern day dilution and cross application of the lifestyle term has produced almost slang derivatives and many use cockold as a buzzword. The Urban Dictionary lists several user added definitions, and in reading them you can see many modern day slang adaptations of the buzzword.

In addition, I've always been of the impression cuckolding was not based simply on an incapability of the male partner... cuckolding can be a punishment for him as the female partner chooses, while he may still be quite capable... but be denied for whatever reason and the male may be forced to watch another male with his partner.

Hope this helps to put cuckolding in a better perspective.

Inyouagain

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RE: Cuckolding - 5/21/2004 4:08:16 AM   
Sinergy


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quote:

there usually comes a point in time that the older male can't get it up anymore,


According to Robin Williams, there is a drug that will make a guy harder than Chinese Algebra long after he should be sublimating his sex drive on the shuffleboard court.

-- Sinergy

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RE: Cuckolding - 5/21/2004 12:17:23 PM   
inyouagain


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I wonder if it will be an over the counter med? Would it be called an anticuckold drug, situated next to antihistamines or perhaps antacids and antcuckolds?

Inyouagain

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RE: Cuckolding - 5/21/2004 3:11:14 PM   
Estring


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Hello? Haven't you heard of Viagra?

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RE: Cuckolding - 5/21/2004 4:39:27 PM   
MizSuz


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Ok, here's another perspective. It's a femdom perspective. As usual, your mileage may vary.

I have yet to meet a man whose fetish is cuckoldry who was impotent. In fact, of those I know who are into it the humiliation had a LOT more to do with it than the sex itself, most of them have no trouble getting laid if they want it. It's not what 'sends' them.

Also, the cuckolded man need not be present for it to be cuckoldry. In fact, many cucks that I know think of being present as a gift that the dominant female has no obligation to give, rather she does it for her own pleasure or to 'include' him. It's not uncommon for a cuckolded man to help his wife get ready for dates. I agree that the definition of cuckolding has changed over the years, but in most instances you'll find the short definitions is "a wife who has sex with people other than her husband" or "an unfaithful wife," either could be true...or not.

Often the male who gets to do the fucking is referred to as the "Bull" or the "Stud." He need not be dominant but it is not uncommon for that to be the case. If the female submits to the bull it's because that is their dynamic, but that often does not occur with femdom couples. It can be common for a cuck to be dominated by both the female and the bull. Being "forced" to 'fluff' the bull in preparation for intercourse with the woman can also be common.

But that's a femdom perspective.

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RE: Cuckolding - 6/1/2004 10:39:56 PM   
Ravenwood


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my experience has been that this day and time you are way off on the cuckolding thing.

I know at the moment 12 couples who are into it and they know several other couples each. everyone of them will tell you it was their husbands idea to cuckold them,it is a major fantasy among submissve males...and has nothing at all to do with the male being older...in fact 7 of the couples I'm speaking about the woman are older by some 8 to 10 yrs than the male.

For the women who grow to like it....after the hubby talks them into,is of course the pleasure,the freedom,etc...

wanna know the real reason a husband wants to be cuckold...because A. he gets to watch a live sex show...B. He does not have to worry about taking care of his wife,another man will do it for him...sounds like a lazy mans way,to me.

Oh yes the creampie thing...you find that mostly in jack off fantasy stories,it does happen in real life,but by a smaller percent than you would think.

< Message edited by Ravenwood -- 6/1/2004 10:45:13 PM >

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RE: Cuckolding - 6/2/2004 4:36:18 AM   
inyouagain


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Ravenwood
my experience has been that this day and time you are way off on the cuckolding thing.

Sorry I forgot to check with your "experiences" prior to forming my own opinion.

Based on your demonstrated fondness for plagiarism, I'd have to ask if the "experiences" you refer to here are in fact your own.

Thanks for the education.

Inyouagain

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RE: Cuckolding - 7/1/2004 1:09:51 PM   
bobup411


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Just curious.. but what is the male dom or the bulls reacton to having another male present in a cuckolding situation...assuming the dom is far from being interested in any bi sexuality, how would he react to the presence, or any interaction required by the Domme ?

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RE: Cuckolding - 7/3/2004 9:58:44 AM   
Jasmyn


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I tend to see the idea of older male/younger female cuckolding as the 'pornographic ideal' but thats not to say it isn't a valid or necessary cuckolding want for some. But I can't agree it would be the more common dynamic than any of the other theories behind cuckolding posted here.

Age, situation, dynamics, roles, whatever are all mere props in the pantomime of cuckolding, or any act of fantasy really...they are not what defines it ,but what acts are necessary to help *it*, the fantasy, to exisit in a fantastical form.

Think of it this way...curry...maybe a popular choice, but regardless of the receipe used.... the effects of indulging in any given heat range are universally the same.

In the case of cuckolding the dish in question is generally humilation...and what a smorgesborg of humilation needs a woman can choose from to pacifiy the ravenous, and the not so ravenous palates of the cuckolded.

On a deeper level I wonder if the want for cuckolding isn't based in ownership needs?

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RE: Cuckolding - 7/6/2004 5:14:36 PM   
Leonidas


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A cuckold is the husband of an unfaithful wife. To cuckold someone (the verb) is to make someone a cuckold either by fucking around (the wife) or fucking their wife (her lover). In english, the term has the connotation of being a fool, or being made a fool of. Arranging for your wife/girlfriend/lover/subbie/slave to fuck someone else with your knowledge isn't the same thing, because she is not going behind your back (being unfaithful).

The original posted response to your question was correct. Arthur is a classic example of a cuckold. I suppose you could have "consentual cuckolding" where there was a desire on the part of the man to be made a fool of and humilliated, but for that to work, it would have to be she, not he, who initiated the illicit liason, and either allowed him to walk in on her one day "en flagrante" or just let him know by subtle hints and clues that she was fucking around behind his back. Some of the previous descriptions just amount to scene play, and of course anything from prison rapes to vigin sacrifices can be done in a scene, since it isn't "real" anyway.

Take care of yourself.

Leonidas

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RE: Cuckolding - 7/13/2004 10:44:45 AM   
Voltare


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

I tend to see the idea of older male/younger female cuckolding as the 'pornographic ideal' but thats not to say it isn't a valid or necessary cuckolding want for some. But I can't agree it would be the more common dynamic than any of the other theories behind cuckolding posted here.

Age, situation, dynamics, roles, whatever are all mere props in the pantomime of cuckolding, or any act of fantasy really...they are not what defines it ,but what acts are necessary to help *it*, the fantasy, to exisit in a fantastical form.

Think of it this way...curry...maybe a popular choice, but regardless of the receipe used.... the effects of indulging in any given heat range are universally the same.

In the case of cuckolding the dish in question is generally humilation...and what a smorgesborg of humilation needs a woman can choose from to pacifiy the ravenous, and the not so ravenous palates of the cuckolded.

On a deeper level I wonder if the want for cuckolding isn't based in ownership needs?


This and Suz's explaination seem to be point on, while most of the other thoughts have been true (in my mind) to one extent or the other.

The common theme, is usually the woman having sex with another male (as Suz suggested usually termed a 'Bull' or 'Stud') and another man (husband/boyfriend/lover/orevenjustafriend - the cuckhold in question) being denied what the Bull/Stud is given. The variations on this theme are darned near endless. Humiliation usually (but not always) plays a role, as well as a certain level of acceptance by the cuckhold towards the state of affairs or arrangement. The theme is usually focused on, but not always, on infidelity. Obviously, a man with a cuckhold fetish and is asking his wife/girlfriend to fulfill this fantasy is still playing the part of the cuckhold - even if his wife/girlfriend would not otherwise have done so. inyouagain's charactarizations are pretty point on, in terms of why some people might engage in this behavior - but of course these were just his takes on it. The important thing isn't the specific 'how to' but rather the generalistic theme. It isn't strictly a BDSM activity, though it certainly can be, especially as the dynamic generally is Domination/submission in nature (Often times the Bull on top, the female submitting to his needs, the cukhold left holding their underwear and waiting patiently to clean up the mess they make.)

For specific suggestions on 'how' it works, visit http://asstr.org and do a search for cuck - you'll find more erotica on this topic then you'll have time to read in a year.

Stephan


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RE: Cuckolding - 7/23/2004 12:38:50 AM   
PassionateNights


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from my perspective, i am a cuckold, because i want my Dominant to find pleasure whereever and how ever she can. This includes the taking of other lovers...it's just a greater sense of her needs before mine

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RE: Cuckolding - 12/26/2004 5:16:45 AM   
LuvSponge


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Yes.

< Message edited by LuvSponge -- 2/25/2005 7:19:11 PM >

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RE: Cuckolding - 12/26/2004 7:14:57 AM   
RealityFix


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Origionally this term came from the habits of the cuckoo,a bird that lays it's egg in the nest of other birds after tossing thier eggs out. It then went on it's merry way,leaving the rearing of it's young to an unconsenting surrogate.

Great for the cuckoo,not so great for the bloodline of the poor bird stuck with it.
Remember that in the old days when this was coined,there was no birth control, and bastards were not well recieved. Especially if they looked nothing like the father.

So to be cuckolded by another male was considered not just shameful,but damaging to one's family inheritance. It screwed up your bloodline.

In modern days we can have sex for fun,so it's not a huge issue.

Now as far as another poster asked,from my perspective as a Top-no way I share with another man. Too dangerous and risky in these "std days of our lives"

I'm not going to risk mine,or my properties safety and health, for fifteen minutes of someone else's fun. It's also a reason I seldom go the bdsm events these days-far too many swingers around,hitting on your women.(usually behind your back)

And while I know it's easy to turn them down,I just find it unsetttling and disrespectful.


< Message edited by RealityFix -- 12/26/2004 7:18:21 AM >

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RE: Cuckolding - 12/26/2004 11:53:28 AM   
Lordandmaster


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I see that being contradicted annoyed you the first time, but this statement doesn't fit my experience either. In fact, of every cuckold couple I've ever been involved with, the male and female have been around the same age. And it's also not true that the female has to be dominant. Of course, a lot of cuck couples are fem domme/male sub, but I've been involved with fem subs too--in fact, the longest relationship I had with a couple involved a woman who was profoundly submissive. (Most of the males have been submissive, but not all.)

Lam

quote:

ORIGINAL: inyouagain

Cuckolding is more prevalent in relationships where theer is a huge disparity in the ages of the male and female.

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RE: Cuckolding - 12/26/2004 3:37:16 PM   
MC2044


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A cuckold is "a man married to an unfaithful wife." Cuckolding is "to make a cuckold of." All the attributes already described are associated with the word, but you can see from its definition that age, humiliation, gender, etc. has nothing to do with it.

Also, some men for various reasons cannot sexually take care of their wife. Some turn to swinging or other pursuits to allow their wives the healthy outlet of sex. Since that man has allowed or agreed to his wife having sex with others, I question whether or not he is truly a cuckold, but that most likely should be another thread.

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RE: Cuckolding - 12/28/2004 2:37:11 PM   
poolman9276


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I read this phrase somewhere, which I think pretty pithily says something about the dual nature of the experience:

"The exquisite agony of the cuckold."




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RE: Cuckolding - 2/25/2005 4:07:12 PM   
LuvSponge


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DAMN girl...you write well!

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