ishyB
Posts: 555
Joined: 9/2/2008
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Greetings ownedbyPF,
Let me begin to say that the quote in my sigline -to me- signifies the difference in the love of a Free (Wo)man and the love of a slave. The mature love being the Free, the immature love being the slave.
A slave will love their Master because the Master fulfills a need in them. A Free will need the object of their love because that love creates a need.
I agree very much with your analogy of the love an owner feels for a pet with the way a Master would own his slave, and the way I think most slaves want to be loved.
However, don't be too sure that the love an owner feels for a pet isn't able to create a need in the owner for said pet, be they human or not.
A need in this case not something like oxygen, that we cannot live without, but instead more a need like an addiction... something we don't want to live without because it "hurts" when we don't have it.
Some addictions are bad of course, and in that case, the person needs to be strong enough to break that addiction and rid himself of the problem, but that doesn't mean that will not hurt.
Other addictions are more innocently and have no negative consequences. As such, a person might choose to indulge in such an addiction should they choose to do so.
When an owner comes to love their pet/slave, I belief that the need that is created, like an addiction, can be one that they can break if needed to. If a dog needs to be put down because he killed a child for instance, or a slave is no longer pleasing.
But breaking that addiction will always hurt, because the need is in fact still there and will be for a while, depending on how strong the love was to begin with.
This is also, again, the reason why Goreans say "only a fool loves a slave". Before you allow yourself to need a slave girl, you better make sure that she is one of those harmless, innocent addictions. You better make sure that she is not going to become a nuisance to you, which will try to control your whole life because of your love/need for her.
Furthermore, I believe that the love a man feels for a woman -any woman- is distinctly different then the love women feel for men.
We women are often brought up with our own concept of love, and tend to project the manifestations of how we feel love unto men, and expect them to feel, and behave the same way.
I believe that this is a mistake, because men experience love much more in a "possessive/protective" form, while for women love takes a more "caring/nurturing" form.
When women love, they want to "feed" the object of their love, when men love they want to "posses" the object of their love. This distinct difference in which we experience the same emotion sometimes makes it hard to talk and think about such things, because instead of discussing one and the same emotion in two different sexes, we are in fact discussion two totally different emotions.
So don't assume that because love can create a need in both men and women, that therefore men are as easily controlled by that need as women are. Because for men, the sheer nature of the way they experience love demands of them that, in order for them to be in love, they need to stay in control of that need, and posses it.
While for women, the nature of the way they experience love demands of them that, in order for them to be in love, they need to surrender to that need, and nurture it.
(Oh dear... I hope that that made sense, but I am too short in time to try and put it more clearly... sometimes when considering my syntax and such... I feel I have read just a little too much of Master Norman's work over the years...)
I wish you well,
ishy
PS: antinomy, I'll get back at you later. 
< Message edited by ishyB -- 3/11/2010 10:24:56 AM >
_____________________________
I want you to know that it doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
and I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I wanted to move on
So I'm already gone
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PoJFn_RIdkg
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RE: slaves thread: support and girlie time - 
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(hate even using that word for all it's capable of riling up)Something I couldn't imagine ever getting okay with... I mean accepting yes, but not without some major emotional strife, would be for my Master to use someone else. That feeling of utter emotional dishevelment has disappeared. Now it seems entirely right that he would, and while it may cause me some envy (not jealousy, I do see a difference between the two) it doesn't risk my sense of security or emotional stability. Is that anything with morals though? I don't know what umbrella that would fall under. 
I used to run, I used to refuse to say what I was feeling... the list goes on. I don't do any of those things anymore because his response was to drag me out, whip me, make me hysterical, thhheeeen talk to me. In other words, it wasn't ever about my feeling those things, it was about how I expressed those things. So I learned that if I'm angry or petulant or whatever, that I damn well better bring it to him, and I better do it in an acceptable fashion. Then he deals with it... lol even if that means not dealing with it, if you know what I mean. At first this required thought. Don't run away, he will only beat your ass and make you tell him anyways, so just tell him... focus... etc. Now, like countless other things, I don't think, I simply do. Now, I suspect that I shifted into this easier than others might because I have a very submissive driven personality... fighting is not in my nature... running was though.... avoidance of something that could be unpleasant was a good idea in my book. 
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