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M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/18/2007 7:05:51 AM   
weakkneed


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May I ask if it is unrealistic to think that a male dom would want to take on a 42 yo male novice. Honestly, I'm a bit of a project - terrified of disease and safety issues yet when naked and on my knees before a man I become overwhelmed with submissive feelings, shame, nervousness, fear, desire to please. I've only found myself in this situation three times but my hands tremble and have found myself close to tears. Are safe/sane doms typically up for dealing with newbie basket cases or is it a rarity? Thank you.
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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/18/2007 7:24:44 AM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
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For me in general it would depend on the sub/slaves eagerness/willingness to try and follow through.  This would need to be felt out to see how it is working at the first service meeting.  Sometimes the eagerness can be a turn on, and expereinse is not needed.  It just really all depends on how I hit it off with the person.

The other thing for me is that I do not play/Dom/what have you with married/partnered men, unless I have talked to the other person they are involved with and they are ok with it.  I am not into being the toy on the side. 

Mike

(in reply to weakkneed)
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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/18/2007 7:53:59 AM   
Kinkypupper


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Most realistic, I can only speak for myself not others, but would consider such a request a honour to even be considered.
Yes medical issues are important and having a medical screening done before such an agreement or at least as a requirement is very prudent.

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/18/2007 9:44:33 AM   
SimplyMichael


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Weakneed,

Male submissives are worthless as a commodity because they are as common as dirt but a lot more work.  Break out of that paradyme and become a male submissive with much to offer without a lot of work and you become a very valuable gem.  Jack off to your fantasies but in a sober moment put yourself in the place of a male dominant and imagine what would make his life easier, more pleasant in a quality of life way, not sexually.  Learn to enjoy and offer those services and you will go from being a pest to an invited guest.

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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/19/2007 9:16:25 PM   
BearsBreech


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Training a newbie, teaching a newbie, teasing a newbie: It's all a riot. You need first to look at your basic chemistry unless you are merely there to use one another.
Bear

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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/20/2007 3:25:03 PM   
goodpet


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
Weakneed,
Male submissives are worthless as a commodity because they are as common as dirt but a lot more work.  Break out of that paradyme and become a male submissive with much to offer without a lot of work and you become a very valuable gem.  Jack off to your fantasies but in a sober moment put yourself in the place of a male dominant and imagine what would make his life easier, more pleasant in a quality of life way, not sexually.  Learn to enjoy and offer those services and you will go from being a pest to an invited guest.


Well said Sir, but might i suggest that goes along for the female sub also.. unless you are looking for just the sexual play and sexual use.

OK,.. i guess HNG who use the male "dom" title,  many are just looking for kinky sex and the female with nothing to offer but sex has something to be of value.

It is just my pipe dream that as a (regardless of male or female) submissive, you have more to offer then just fantasy sex.  Maybe some talent, intelligence, humor, service, devotion.. and maybe less drama..   More to offer perhaps?

Don't get me wrong,, fantasy sex is a good thing to offer also.. but hopefully that is not all you offer..

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: M2M newbie sub-unrealistic? - 5/20/2007 7:57:29 PM   
PairOfDimes


Posts: 324
Joined: 7/20/2006
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Try to make yourself less of a basket case, or, at least, try to express it less in interactions with others and to manage it on your own. Lots of anxiety and "drama" and "emotional processing" is not generally attractive in the initial stages of a relationship-especially if you expect your prospective partner to take responsibility for those emotions!

Then, if there's a men's SM community near you, get involved in it.

(in reply to weakkneed)
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