abuse

abuse (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Health and Safety

Message

tieme -> abuse (5/14/2005 9:19:38 PM)
I have this friend she is seeing her master an he is very UGLY to her at times/ He treats her like a dog he gets mad her all the time will not listen to what she say he yells too / I have tryed to help her in many ways but she wants some help before leaveing the master / I would like your thinking on this please Help !!!

MsSilvie -> RE: abuse (5/14/2005 10:54:21 PM)
You can't help her decide to leave. She has to make that decision herself. You can support her decisions, but they have to be hers.

straykitten -> RE: abuse (5/15/2005 12:11:41 AM)
While it's good to be worried about a friend, I don't know if I would be as frantic as you are. The fact that he's not physically abusive means she's in no immediate danger; it sounds more like they aren't compatible. After all, I bet at least one person is reading this and thinking "Lucky bitch..." [;)] As such, I don't think she needs to be worried about repercussions for leaving. But otherwise, I agree with MsSilvie...it's her call.

mistoferin -> RE: abuse (5/15/2005 4:59:06 AM)
quote: I bet at least one person is reading this and thinking "Lucky bitch..." If even one person read that and is thinking "Lucky Bitch"....they need a consult in a psych department.

Mercnbeth -> RE: abuse (5/15/2005 9:27:59 AM)
quote: I have tryed to help her in many ways but she wants some help before leaveing the master so help her pack.......what other sort of "help" is she looking for? quote: She has to make that decision herself. You can support her decisions, but they have to be hers. MsSilvie is correct. No matter how good your intentions, ultimately it is her decision to make. quote: The fact that he's not physically abusive means she's in no immediate danger she could be, if his verbal and emotional abuse reach an intolerable level, she could be in danger from herself....

PenelopePitstop -> RE: abuse (5/15/2005 10:24:01 AM)
You can't make her leave but you can at least make sure she knows the options - maybe get her some info on shelters and such. Being a good friend these days isn't about giving advice but picking up the pieces after it's all over.

RiotGirl -> RE: abuse (5/19/2005 7:34:57 AM)
quote: You can't make her leave but you can at least make sure she knows the options - maybe get her some info on shelters and such. Being a good friend these days isn't about giving advice but picking up the pieces after it's all over i completely agree with both statements.

DrkAngl -> RE: abuse (5/19/2005 2:50:43 PM)
I am a former abuse survivor. The abuse was from my, now late, husband. I left, took the baby and ran, spent a month in the local women's shelter. Three months later, he passed on. Anyways, what I'm thinking is your friend lives in fear of this person. That's very common in abusive relationships. That's why a lot of married women don't leave their husbands. What most will tell you is if you have a car, keep a bag packed in the trunk. That way if you have to suddenly leave then you will have what you need. Also, find the number to the local batered women's shelter in her area. They are great help if you need a place to suddenly go. And it's very protected there. The one I went to also offered counceling as well as food if you didn't have the $$ to provide some for yourself. The best thing I can think of is to leave while he's not at home. That way he can't threaten her. And be prepaired for the "I'm sorry, it won't happen again" routines. Because that usually happens. Then the cycle starts all over again. If she's going to leave she needs to stick with it and not go back. All you can do for her is to support her emotionally. All the talking in the world won't help if she herself isn't truely ready to leave, but let her know there is a safe haven to go to....the batered women's shelter.

LadyTigana -> RE: abuse (5/22/2005 8:49:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: straykitten The fact that he's not physically abusive means she's in no immediate danger; it sounds more like they aren't compatible. (...) As such, I don't think she needs to be worried about repercussions for leaving. Nonsense. Mental abuse is as bad if not worse than physical abuse. Ever hear of stalkers? Just because a victim is not being beaten up physically doesn't mean they're not being hurt. Also, mental abuse can escalate to physical abuse without warning. ANY abuse is dangerous. Anyone who leaves an abusive relationship will experience repercussions, whether they come from the abuser, or from their own guilt and fear. Either way, this girl needs professional help and counselling. Even if she leaves her abuser, she will end up with another one if she doesn't get help. I know all this because my ex husband who mentally abused me for years, one day picked up a rope in our bedroom, came up behind me and tried to strangle me to death. There was no warning. He went to jail. I went into a spiral of depression and guilt, and almost committed suicide. Those were my repercussions. Thankfully I got help, and I hope the girl with the abusive "master" (not really a master of anything) does too.

MHOO314 -> RE: abuse (5/22/2005 9:40:01 PM)
yes, not really a master of anything, just because one wears the title of Dom, doesn't make them dominant-- it s a far cry from domineering to dominant, yet a very fine line--

masterforyorlove -> RE: abuse (5/27/2005 12:35:40 PM)
Tieme, perhaps your friend would have an easier time of saying goodbye to her abusive Master if you woul find her a new one????

Page: [1]

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.03125