RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (Full Version)

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Red82 -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 10:06:19 PM)

i would love to hear if anyone has ever assigned such things as reading and being able to explain Plato's Theory of Forms, or Nietzsche's philosophy's on modern day christianity. I suppose that wouldent be very common...




LadyHeart -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 10:07:42 PM)

I have a number of resources posted on my CollarMe journal which both my Dom husband and myself send subbies to for assignment purposes. Having it permanently on line saves a lot of duplication. We will then assign essays or "comprehension tests" based on those resources. It is constantly being added to as we edit our workshop notes and our posts to BDSM lists that have relevancy. We also assign "post scene" essays to elicit feedback on what went right/wrong and to gain understanding of where a sub's headspace is. It helps maintain the mental connection with submissives who don't live with us, as well as being informative.
:))
LadyHeart




SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 10:17:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Red82

i would love to hear if anyone has ever assigned such things as reading and being able to explain Plato's Theory of Forms, or Nietzsche's philosophy's on modern day christianity. I suppose that wouldent be very common...


Actually I have assigned someone to read and be able to discuss Neitzsche, Jung, Plato, Confucius and Sun Tzu's Art of War for different reasons. Currently I'm reading The Masks of God and Hero with a Thousand Faces again for discussion purposes in future.

edited because I've had more than one glass of Merlot this evening.




Red82 -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 10:20:22 PM)

quote:

Actually I have assigned someone to read and be able to discuss Nietzsche, Jung, Plato, Confucious and Sun Tzu's Art of War for different reasons. Currently I'm reading The Masks of God and Hero with a Thousand Faces again for discussion purposes in future.


Aah! and all the way in California too! Well....i can't have all the luck i suppose...




DominaSmartass -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 10:58:55 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

I use written assignments and have found them very helpful. My sub and I did a written assignment together on communication. It was like a 10 step kinda deal I found on the internet and it was very helpful in getting him to open up and voice his needs/desires. I found it helpful because it taught us both how to speak to each other in a more respectful way without allowing negativity to enter into the conversation.

I also gave him other various assignments which he completed and found that they helped him a great deal discover what submission means to him.

~Lashra



Oh! if you haven't already, would you mind linking to this exercise? Thanks.




DominaSmartass -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/29/2007 11:04:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck

quote:

ORIGINAL: Red82

Actually I have assigned someone to read and be able to discuss Neitzsche, Jung, Plato, Confucius and Sun Tzu's Art of War for different reasons.


Hmm...would one of those reasons be because you're an English professor? Or are you truly spawn of satan? Either way, you rank as a sadist in my book ;)




DeviantDiva -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 12:00:11 AM)

This website is no longer updated, but there are quite a wealth of topics and quotes relating to D/s relationships; primarly the site was geared toward those who wished to explore and write about their submission:

http://www.inhischains.com/kindlings/

I love assigning written essays/projects and I also agree with some of the posters who commented on the medium of the written essay being a good gauge for measuring a potential sub's authenticity.  Oh and on a related note, sometimes good old fashioned repetitive line writing can be a great form of punishment...sometimes I'll select a particular quote or saying that has special relevance to the issue and have my pet write it out by hand, say 100 times...




SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 12:51:27 AM)

quote:

Hmm...would one of those reasons be because you're an English professor? Or are you truly spawn of satan? Either way, you rank as a sadist in my book ;)


Not in the least...a little light reading in my view. Spawn of satan? Little ole sweet Me? Nahhh. Da....er...satan and I have never made one another's acquaintance.





LadyPact -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 2:49:10 AM)

I definitely give writing assingments.  Journaling is always a mainstay and topic writing as well.  Research on the lifestyle itself is almost endless, with different styles and points of view in articles.  I've given specific assingments to read and have a report written or in some cases, allowed him to go through a particular site and see what was of particular interest to him and have him write on that.  It's especially helpful if someone is new to the lifestyle or distance is an issue.




Politesub53 -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 3:02:40 AM)

Writing assignments can be a very useful tool, whatever the distance between Dominant and submissive. i often had to do an essay based on just one word, such as respect, or discipline. trying to do 1,000 words on respect without being repetetive isnt easy. It hade to be my own words and no posting of text found on the net.

i once complained 1,000 wasnt fair and was told i was correct and to make it 2,000. i only made that mistake the once. [;)]




LaMistressa -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 5:04:26 AM)

I recently made a potential submissive write a five page article on Kitty Carlisle Hart, as he didn't know who she was and made a joke about her passing. He now knows an awful lot about her!

Don't diss Kitty, people.




Lashra -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 5:05:52 AM)

Ladies, I could not find the website but I did have the questions. You have a series of questions and you both answer them, then exchange papers so you can read each others answers and discuss them. You do this over a period of time so that you can think and reflect upon what it is you really want to say. The key to these exercises is to be honest, detailed and to think about what it is you really want to say to this person.
I know this is hard to read but I cut and pasted it and I couldnt get it to come out right and I have to run to the jobsite. Good luck!

~Lashra

  COMMUNICATION EXERCISE


The following is a communication exercise. Complete each sentence with a maximum of 5 statements concerning your family member/significant other: Often there are problems in a relationship because what is expected of each partner is not clear. Complete the following sentence with a maximum of 5 expectations you have:In our relationship, I expect of/from you . . . . .     Assumptions also prevent effective communications. When we assume something about the other person or assume she/he knows something about us, we base behavior on something which may be incorrect, or in a state of changing. Complete the following statement with no more than 5 assumptions you have about the other person. I assume you know . . . . .   When communications become strained, many topics are avoided. We keep "secrets" for may reasons but they can be very destructive to relationships. Think of some topics that you avoid talking about, or feelings that are uncomfortable for you to discuss. These are some topics I hesitate to bring up with you: .   I have difficulty sharing these feelings with you:   Complete with a maximum of 5 statements: I feel distant from you when . . . .   I feel close to you when . . . . .   Improving a relationship requires both people making a commitment to work on the improvement. Abstinence does not solve all the problems. Think of some behavioral changes you can make to improve your relationship: In order to improve our relationship, I am willing . . . .   Getting recognition for things we value in ourselves is an important part of our relationships. Sometimes we "assume"(see #2) those close to us know what we like about ourselves. Think carefully about your positive traits and share them with your partner. These are traits I value in myself . . . . . . Just as we assume others know about us, we often make the faulty assumption that we don't have to say positive things about them that they already know. Think about what you value in your partner and share these things with him/her. These are the things we need most to hear from each other and yet we often say the least. These are the traits I value in you . . . . .  

Rules For Good Communication Let the other person know that he/she is important. Their feelings are important. Avoid name calling and demeaning the other person, which will only make the other person defensive. Don't criticize a person; discuss specific aspects of his/her behavior rather than criticizing. Talk in a manner that is clear and specific. Ask for clarification and feedback. Avoid saying, "You always........," or "You never.......,". Be direct and honest. Say what you mean, mean what you say. Don't tell the other person what he/she is thinking or feeling. The only way to know is to ask. Stay focused on one issue at time, and work through to resolution. Don't bring up past issues. Try to let go of past issues. If you want to revisit old issues, focus only on one issue at a time. Work towards understanding how your partner feels, share your honest feelings, and work toward compromise and building future trust. When differences arise, look for compromises rather than right-wrong, good-bad categories. Work towards solutions. Present ideas on how to improve the situation or how to make things better. Resolutions are often a matter of give and take. Use "I feel" messages instead of "You are" messages. For example, say, "I feel hurt when you ignore me!" but do not say, "You are selfish and inconsiderate for ignoring me." Understand that we have different perceptions of the same event or experience. Therefore, don't waste time arguing over who is right or wrong. The task is to understand the other person's perception and to work towards solutions. Should the discussion escalate and become destructive, either person may suggest that the discussion be stopped and resumed at a later date and time. You must be specific about the date and time to resume. Deal with problems as they arise, or set a time to deal with the problem. Don't allow the problems to build until there is a major blowup. Write a list of rules that feel right for your relationship. Have them handy when you are problem solving or having a heated discussion.      




aidan -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 7:23:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck

quote:

ORIGINAL: Red82

i would love to hear if anyone has ever assigned such things as reading and being able to explain Plato's Theory of Forms, or Nietzsche's philosophy's on modern day christianity. I suppose that wouldent be very common...


Actually I have assigned someone to read and be able to discuss Neitzsche, Jung, Plato, Confucius and Sun Tzu's Art of War for different reasons. Currently I'm reading The Masks of God and Hero with a Thousand Faces again for discussion purposes in future.

Oh...Oh wow. I think I need to go take a cold shower.

If a Woman ever gave me an assignment like that, I'd ask Her to marry me right then and there [;)]

Writing being one of my few marketable and useful skills, I've always enjoyed being asked to do journals or to write essays. I often have thoughts that are better expressed through written word then speaking.




meticulousgirl -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 11:29:55 AM)

i've only been required to write an essay once.  It was actually something that i really enjoyed, it opened me up and honestly i wish it were asked of me more often. 

i am also one who enjoys learning but at the same time i feel as though it's a great way to soul search if the right essay is asked of you. 





Politesub53 -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 12:38:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

i've only been required to write an essay once.  It was actually something that i really enjoyed, it opened me up and honestly i wish it were asked of me more often. 

i am also one who enjoys learning but at the same time i feel as though it's a great way to soul search if the right essay is asked of you. 




Nice point about soul searching. Not only writing about what a topic means, but about what it means to you, can be very revealing.




SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 1:50:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

quote:

ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck

quote:

ORIGINAL: Red82

i would love to hear if anyone has ever assigned such things as reading and being able to explain Plato's Theory of Forms, or Nietzsche's philosophy's on modern day christianity. I suppose that wouldent be very common...


Actually I have assigned someone to read and be able to discuss Neitzsche, Jung, Plato, Confucius and Sun Tzu's Art of War for different reasons. Currently I'm reading The Masks of God and Hero with a Thousand Faces again for discussion purposes in future.

Oh...Oh wow. I think I need to go take a cold shower.

If a Woman ever gave me an assignment like that, I'd ask Her to marry me right then and there [;)]

Writing being one of my few marketable and useful skills, I've always enjoyed being asked to do journals or to write essays. I often have thoughts that are better expressed through written word then speaking.


whoa there aidan...I'm actually diving back into Campbell because of a conversation I had recently in which he was brought up. The name rang a bell and it drove me nuts that I couldn't place him. It's been more years than I care to admit since I've read any of his stuff. dear gawd more years than you've even been alive dear boy. No offense.

So...I tore apart 3 of 7 bookshelves until I finally found what I was looking for by him. I find book tends to lead to book and author to author for me. I've also grown a bit as a human since I last read him and decided to see how my appreciation for his work and philosopy has grown as well. I'm enjoying it.




Calandra -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 4:07:40 PM)

~fast reply~
 
Thank you Lashra, I will look that over carefully later when things are quiet in the house.
 
Gosh, thanks everyone for posting on your views of the subject. I have always tended to avoid journaling, since it was so open ended and might become a "chore" rather than a joy...
 
Have any of you sub/slaves resisted, and if so, why? What helped you to begin enjoying a journal?
 
Mistresses, how many of you have had a resistant submissive who later appreciated the task of journaling? Do you have a special format (addressing each page to you, for example)?
 




pixelslave -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 4:20:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Politesub53
i once complained 1,000 wasnt fair and was told i was correct and to make it 2,000. i only made that mistake the once. [;)]


It would appear that you're a fast learner! [:D]
 
I've written a great deal over the years about my feelings on various topics and have found it to be a useful tool.  Keeping a journal however, does require more than a minimal amount of time for me each day and what seems to have been a lot of determined dedication, which for some reason has always been difficult for me to maintain for extended periods of time.  I've journaled off and on, but never managed to keep one going; finding writing on specific topics as I discovered the need, to be more revealing to me (or carthartic if that was the particular need) and thus more useful to me as things changed or events triggered other things to begin to surface in my life. [&:]
 
 - pixel




LadyHugs -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 4:33:55 PM)

Dear Calandra, Ladies and Gentlemen;

In my mind's eyes I see, each slave is different and using the written word is different in their mind's eyes.  Some see journaling as a punishment or chore, especially when they have attention disorders or the dreaded Dyslexia.  Instead of having that slave write--I have them record it on tape.  Now days, with the digital cameras and tapes, a slave can record, burn to disk and surrender it to me for review.  Some individuals can write well and express themselves well through the written word. 

It is also in my mind's eyes I see, the journal is an opportunity to express themselves, without having their words, spelling and or grammar being tested or under focus but, rather what their heart, their spirit and their slave guts are expressing.  I personally do not mind a rambling and jumbled mind, as that is how often thoughts are processed in our minds naturally.  The burden lifted, they are talking to themselves as much as they talk to me.  Emotions flood forward, no different from a round table discussion can be with so many dimentions any one individual may have.  Life has many facades or faces and those faces have even more facades, much like a cut crystal or a diamond has many cuts to cause it's brightness, clarity and or beauty.

If I do have an assignment to where the slave is to write their findings and summary of the particular area; I have them read it as well.  From their delivery, I can tell if it was just copy down and or really getting the knowledge, as to be first hand and own that information. 

I do have great interest in service.  There has been many who teach service for the present.  I teach service from historical roots, giving tradition and ceremonial roots to what is done.  When I teach this -- the understanding, the light bulb moment of how it all makes sense comes to rest and the appreciation is manifested.  I have an equal wish that more was addressed as to accepting service.  It is very important for a Dominant to be just as engaged with watching, appreciating and complimenting the slave serving.  The hurt in slave's eyes when they are not watched and their form not noticed pains me deeply.

In my mind's eyes I see, there is much more than the mechanics of serving and or service.  It is the magic that can be raised from within their soul, when they can gather in the many aspects of serving, to give service, to accept service and be empowered from what is past, what is present and what is future.  It is beyond public consumption but, a slave's mastery of the arts of service and inspire all to partake in the experienced and be forever 'touched.'  When the 'spirit' of service is manifested, a part of them imprints on the entire experience as they serve.  This is where a slave inspires those they touch--even their Master.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs




LadyHugs -> RE: Written assignments for ongoing education..? (5/30/2007 4:49:46 PM)

Dear Calandra, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
Per your post #37 - to the Mistresses; if there was any special format or ideas on a resistant slave in reference to journaling.
 
I do advise my slaves that this is the opportunity for them to have me listen to their 'slave heart.'
 
How they see journaling is very important and I strongly urge Masters and or Mistresses to LISTEN!  Some see it as humiliating--I won't have a slave journal.  I will have them give me a debriefing of their day.  We do this when we ask someone how their day was; asking any important events happen, etc.
 
Some slaves are extremely shy and choke up when asked to write about themselves.  It can be for any reason, such as Dyslexia or schooling.  The important thing in my mind's eyes--is never making journaling a form of humiliation or punishment. 
 
Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,

Lady Hugs




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