RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (Full Version)

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LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 8:49:36 PM)

Hi KC- Go ahead and edit that to read "Most submissive females"

I thought it was clearly implied to be the group I was discussing since it was discussing women who are subs who also happen to dominate others.

Surprised after all my posts you think I don't think there are a lot of female dominants out there?




kc692 -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 8:53:45 PM)

No offense, LA, but I think "most submissive females feel comfortable in submitting to one, and dominating to others" is still wrong also, but that is only my opinion.[;)]




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 8:57:46 PM)

OK well I think that's really true.




LightHeartedMaam -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 9:11:06 PM)

If it takes calling him "Master" to get him to take out the garbage, it's no skin off my nose.




kc692 -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 9:44:14 PM)

Again, and this is only my opinion, I think there are a lot of submissive women that just want to submit, and not dominate anyone, that was my point.  I am not used to looking at it from their perspective though, so I might be wrong.




imthatacheyouhav -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 9:59:39 PM)

I personally have no desire in anyway shape or form to dominate anyone. that of course is just my own personal flavor.




Elorin -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/12/2007 11:01:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314
I so don't get that, its not Me, I'm a Domina, end of story---I'm not knocking those that do--buw I always wonder if that doesn't mean thay are a switch??

For me? Absolutely, I'm a switch. And I list as a dominant on collarme because I'm not looking for tops, dom/mes, or masters. As my profile states.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rafters
"Switch" implies they explore both aspects in the same persona.
This thread is more about people who are always being this persons abso-fucking-lutly, 100% Domme and that persons closet subbie.

Erm...since we are talking about women who say in their profile that they have a Dom/me...I think it's not about being someone's sub in the closet.




Dini -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 5:08:07 AM)

I started out in the scene as a very disgruntled bottom, who found my beast as Domme within a very short time by turning the scenes and thriving as the dominant player.. for many years I classed myself as 100% Domme to the point of being very bitch to anyone who even dared to try and cross the line with me.
My subs are both male and female, with the greater majority being male. About a year ago I met a Domme.. who for some reason was just the person to take me into subspace.. *shock … horror* I had bottomed a bit, but never subbed before, and I now see myself rightly or wrongly as a switch… 80/20 Domme / sub… however unlike many I only submit to Dommes… call it personal choice.. makeup.. whatever… It is what works for Me.




Evlgryn -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 7:23:28 AM)

  • I have had women serve me that have male pets of their own. I think most of us have elements of both in us (not me, I am 110% hetero top, that's my story and I am sticking to it). Plus dominance is a sliding scale, some people are more dominant, some more submissive. Some dommes I have met have been intimidatingly dominant, some don't impress me at all. Some subs I have met have been  very competent gracious people, and some such snivelling little whiners ( and weiners) you just want to reach down and tweek their nose.
The wildcard here is prodommes. I have known a couple of these who when on their own dime are definitely sub. There are some entry level prodommes who even sub for money on one page and domme for money on another. Why is this so?...."Follow the money".




marine87 -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 8:07:47 AM)

All this kinda reminds me of the Marines and our rank structure. Being that there's a higher rank who has other leaders working under him and below the midway leader is the troops. It seems like the D women are the young leaders* which can kind of make sense. I dont see why it is the other way around in these threads where the man is the midway guy.




TigressFL -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 8:33:53 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
Most females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others.  They especially feel more comfortable dominating other females.


I think that "some" rather than "most" females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others. I think there are then some females that have no interest in being dominant at all. Then there are some females that have no interest in submission at all. Then there are some females that are interested in equality in their relationships. Then there are some that are simply cluless and have no idea what they want in a relationship.




Emperor1956 -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 8:50:21 AM)

A slightly different "take" on women who identify as dominant, but have a submissive relationship to a man as well:

I have been the Top/Dominant/Master to two women who identified primarily as dominant themselves (NOT at the same time...a man has to sleep, sometime.  Jeeeeze!). For one, the relationship was much as Elorin describes:  A primarily dominant woman who enjoyed sexual submission with a man (although she also had sexual contact as a top with female submissives) and who related to men in a sexually submissive manner. 

The other was a much more complex relationship, with her identifying sexually as almost totally Lesbian, very Domme in all aspects of her life (including a stint as a pro-Domme of some reknown), and yet when submitting to me, deeply submissive, in a deep "I want to please you Daddy" headspace.  When we were not engaged in a D/s relationship, there was a lot of competition, and a fair amount of dispute.  So why did that relationship happen for either of us?

One factor you can't deny is good old fashioned lust and attraction, which we had in spades for eachother.  Another is the "outlet" for sexual and power-related desires that her public persona had pretty much precluded.  But I think the largest advantage for her was the freedom being submissive to me gave her to explore this deep inner submissive person, and the freedom that a D/s relationship can give the submissive to let go in many ways she believes she can't otherwise let go.

E

(Edited to add:  Oh, yah:  
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
Most females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others.  They especially feel more comfortable dominating other females.


I think LA already said that this might have been an overstatement, but folks keep commenting on it.  How's this?  Read LA's original post to state:  "Most females who have already identified themselves as submissive tend to be comfortable in submission to one person . . ."   That should take care of the overly broad assertion about "most" females.  Clarifying language in italics, and LA, sorry for putting words in your mouth if I missed it.) 




truesub4u -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 9:11:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I so don't get that, its not Me, I'm a Domina, end of story---I'm not knocking those that do--buw I always wonder if that doesn't mean thay are a switch??
 



For years I was always told than the male was dominant over all. Of course after I was done laughing, it was explained to me that in the earlier times. Men did dominate all. No way was a female allowed power. Even one who held rank of queen. 

Of course trying to explain that to Cleopatra or Nefratari, (Had to google that name let me tell you..lol) whom had both Ramses II and Moses bowing down before her.

Most of the Ladies i've met, have never bowed down before a man, and just simply will not. So there for I really do not understand the concept of every woman being beneath men.

I have in fact witnessed one whom tried to take down a female dom. He's a loyal slave to her to this day. It was not a pretty sight when it happened. But it's still laughed about with in her circle. [:D]




SimplyMichael -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 9:37:42 AM)

People aren't as simple as many want them to be, they are more complex and nuanced but often are not allowed to explore that complexity either by society or their own self created prison.

My last long term relationship was with a dominant woman.  Our relationship had a subtle power shift in my direction which ebbed and flowed.  Our sex was pretty rough but we didn't do a lot of bdsm play because for me the energy wasn't quite right, our communication wasn't quite good enough and I think I never quite felt safe opening up.

My current partner is another dominant woman who in this case is quite submissive to me and the power exchange is quite clear and stark.  That said, I feel quite safe and have and will continue to explore some rather undomly territory with her because it turns us both on.  I am sure it would be quite confusing to anyone looking on but to her and I it is completely clear and almost effortless in its beauty.  She is quite clearly the Yin to my Yang but few realize the Chinese believed that energy to ebb and flow rather than be fixed polarities.




octavia -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 10:16:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

...is quite clearly the Yin to my Yang but few realize the Chinese believed that energy to ebb and flow rather than be fixed polarities.


At the risk of sounding like a "Michael groupie", I think  you make an incredible point here that is often overlooked.  It's about the power flow.  Power is not a finite fixed thing that can be bottled and handed over or stored.  It is a moving, breathing, dynamic that is ALWAYS shifting and flowing from person to person.  This is true in all relationships not just D/s one.  It is in D/s though, that we become aware  of it and start admitting  at what point in the tide we feel best. 

This thread brings up something that   i have been thinking about lately.  I have found that not only am i fairly capable of Domme, I might even be good at it.  The problem with that is, I have no desire.  For me to take on the Domme role for these switches who keep finding me and asking,  I do it as a favor almost.  Its like  i can. they seem to need it so badly, so i do.  The sad confession is, all the while Im just thinking if i can really get them to give me a pedicure cause that would save me 30.00.




dawntreader -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 10:22:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

People aren't as simple as many want them to be, they are more complex and nuanced but often are not allowed to explore that complexity either by society or their own self created prison.

...few realize the Chinese believed that energy to ebb and flow rather than be fixed polarities.


Groupie or not...this is spot on!




BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 10:31:03 AM)

There are many here on collarme and else wheres that are slaves/sub to a master/top and a dom/top to all others..bounty




kc692 -> RE: Domme's that are sub to a Master/Male Dom (6/13/2007 2:04:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

A slightly different "take" on women who identify as dominant, but have a submissive relationship to a man as well:

I have been the Top/Dominant/Master to two women who identified primarily as dominant themselves (NOT at the same time...a man has to sleep, sometime.  Jeeeeze!). For one, the relationship was much as Elorin describes:  A primarily dominant woman who enjoyed sexual submission with a man (although she also had sexual contact as a top with female submissives) and who related to men in a sexually submissive manner. 

The other was a much more complex relationship, with her identifying sexually as almost totally Lesbian, very Domme in all aspects of her life (including a stint as a pro-Domme of some reknown), and yet when submitting to me, deeply submissive, in a deep "I want to please you Daddy" headspace.  When we were not engaged in a D/s relationship, there was a lot of competition, and a fair amount of dispute.  So why did that relationship happen for either of us?

One factor you can't deny is good old fashioned lust and attraction, which we had in spades for eachother.  Another is the "outlet" for sexual and power-related desires that her public persona had pretty much precluded.  But I think the largest advantage for her was the freedom being submissive to me gave her to explore this deep inner submissive person, and the freedom that a D/s relationship can give the submissive to let go in many ways she believes she can't otherwise let go.

E

(Edited to add:  Oh, yah:  
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
Most females tend to be comfortable in submission to one person, and prefer to be dominant to all others.  They especially feel more comfortable dominating other females.


I think LA already said that this might have been an overstatement, but folks keep commenting on it.  How's this?  Read LA's original post to state:  "Most females who have already identified themselves as submissive tend to be comfortable in submission to one person . . ."   That should take care of the overly broad assertion about "most" females.  Clarifying language in italics, and LA, sorry for putting words in your mouth if I missed it.) 



Again, sorry for the semantics, but I dont see how you can say that "most women who have already identified themselves to be submissive, tend to submit to one and want to dominate others".  Generalizations are generalizations, no matter what clarifying language you throw in.  I am  quite sure that there are quite a few women that have already identified themselves to be submissive, are that and just that, and have no want to dominate everyone. 

Not trying to be a poop head, and again, is just my opinion.[:D]




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