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fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/22/2007 10:21:00 AM   
Phoenix2raven


Posts: 347
Joined: 10/14/2006
Status: offline 		My submissive has Fibromyalgia and c-fids. Are there any Doms or subs who can help me with understanding how these diseases affect all aspects of sessions. For example We had a great session last night all seemed to be going great but apparently not.She woke this morning and couldn't move her arms because I had flogged her with a tiny koosh flogger on her upper back which happens to be were there are several fybro points. She has warned me about these points but didn't say red during our session. That is not an excuse for messing up or to place blame on her. I have flogged her there before with little to no bad reaction during or after. So that makes me wonder what more can I do to prevent this from happening. It seems to be a guessing game that makes it very difficult to judge if I should or shouldn't flog certain areas. The only other thing I can think of  is to either not flog her on the crucial spots or require her to red out any time I even come close to  her fybro points.  So with that being said I'm hoping that I can get as much help as possible in understanding what other Dom's or subs do for there submissives. So I can do the right thing by her.     
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/22/2007 10:45:00 AM   
YesMistressIrish


Posts: 1135
Joined: 5/1/2007
From: Calif
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Phoenix2raven

My submissive has Fibromyalgia and c-fids. Are there any Doms or subs who can help me with understanding how these diseases affect all aspects of sessions. For example We had a great session last night all seemed to be going great but apparently not.She woke this morning and couldn't move her arms because I had flogged her with a tiny koosh flogger on her upper back which happens to be were there are several fybro points. She has warned me about these points but didn't say red during our session. That is not an excuse for messing up or to place blame on her. I have flogged her there before with little to no bad reaction during or after. So that makes me wonder what more can I do to prevent this from happening. It seems to be a guessing game that makes it very difficult to judge if I should or shouldn't flog certain areas. The only other thing I can think of  is to either not flog her on the crucial spots or require her to red out any time I even come close to  her fybro points.  So with that being said I'm hoping that I can get as much help as possible in understanding what other Dom's or subs do for there submissives. So I can do the right thing by her.     

Phoenix,
I was a local sgl for Fibro and chronic illnesses for women for 3 years, and an Int sgl for 5. Please know you both have my understanding and support. Fibro sucks!
Want the good, or the bad news first? OK... the bad:
Your sub may experience pain anywhere with long-lasting effects when you flog anywhere. Sorry, but that's the bad news.
 
 
The good news is: Many go into remission, or find a way to greatly improve their symptoms. Please private me if you'd like to brainstorm with me re: solutions.
Another piece of good news: On your profile you say you are looking for a pain slut. Go for it baby! Your sub will need very gentle treatment from you until either remission, or fix-it.
 
I want to ask and make sure that you have had all other major illnesses checked for, and does she have a dx of Fibro and cfids?
 
There are many thngs besides Fibro that create such troubling symptoms. You might already know all of this and I am sure you understand my concern re: other possible ilnesses/diseases. Some are easily handled and eliminate the painful symtoms, which would allow you both to pay more 'heavily'.
 
Best,
Miss Irish
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“The individual activity of one man with backbone will do more than a thousand men with a mere wishbone.”
~William J H Boetcker

(in reply to Phoenix2raven)
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/22/2007 10:56:04 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		It is hard to guess how a body will react so please try not to see this as a matter of blame on any side.

With me my trigger spots kinda roam & they don't always react the same way to the same stimuli. It took me agessssss to figure out what I call my pain cycle. Months of writing detail on what I did and what the pain result would be, not just in play but in every aspect of my life. Sleep was also noted & food. Eventually my dom and I did find the pattern to most of what sets me off. In my mind it is kinda like.. thinking that 'I play.. then I pay'.
So we know that I must must must rest afterwards & usually need to take a hot bath followed by gentle massage. Heh a new meaning to 'aftercare' but it made a difference with me. I avoid sessions when I haven't been doing well such as not sleeping or having pain flares.
Stretching helps too, he will help me do leg and arm stretches before/after.
Weirdly, playing or sex in a warmer room helps too although I have no idea why lol.
So much of it is balance, balancing sleep/nutrition/excercise. Keeping to a regular schedule helps me too.

Is she under a doctors care? They may have better ideas than I do, I am still trying to muddle my way thru!

It is worth it to me, the play = pay. I sure wish I could play more but right now it is around every 3-4 months. Oh I almost forgot, it helps to break up sessions too. Stop for a bit and move around, walk or be held depending on the body need.
I wish both of you the best of luck in managing it. Stress kicks it up so try not to worry about it so much.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to Phoenix2raven)
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/22/2007 5:04:13 PM   
SeeksOnlyOne


Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		i was hired as a manager at a new school last year.....one of my employees has fibromyalgia, and let me know right off the bat it sometimes affected her abilty to work.  i told her we would work through it.

half way through the school year, she and her husband told me that it had improved so much-she thought maybe she had 1/4 of the problems this year as last year. she never missed a minute of work because of it this year.

turns out the lady there before me who was manager was a mean, nasty human being who never found joy in anything, and did not wish them to either.

i demand(hahaha) laughter of my employees, if it means acting a fool my self-so be it.  they truly think the change in atmosphere and the relief from dreading work every day helped her.  her husband said he doesnt know how to handle her smiling when she comes home every day and having energy to do things again.

not medical advice, but all i had to offer about the subject.....i hope it helps and wish you well.


< Message edited by SeeksOnlyOne -- 6/22/2007 5:05:07 PM >

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to Phoenix2raven)
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/24/2007 10:01:05 AM   
PAsextoy4u


Posts: 58
Joined: 9/27/2006
Status: offline 		Im so sorry to hear she is having so many problems.  I am glad to see a Master so open to finding ways to help her cope and to find ways to play with her that are easier on her body.  Unfortunately, as others have said, fibromyalgia is a disease of many symptoms and complications.

It was very frustrating for my former Master because he would do one thing one time and it was wonderful and arousing and he would do the same thing the next day and it would causing agonizing pain.  Because he had never experienced that with another submissive, he struggled with accepting that the pain was real for me.  I think he struggled with believing it was from the fibromyalgia and wasnt from some resistance or disobedience on my part.  In hindsight, I can see this was a problem for our relationship.  He didnt know what to believe and what to do.

There are some things that help.  I have had at least 60% of my symptoms healed and my life is much different now.  I have more energy, I have 50% less pain while being 100% more active.  I sleep at least 6-7 hours now, straight through, instead of an hour or so at a time.  Fibromyalgia CAN be managed, and can be healed to some degree.  There are alternative options that DO help, more than the drugs do.  I stopped taking ALL pharmaceutical drugs a year ago - no pain pills, no anti-inflammatory drugs, no muscle relaxers!

I would be more than glad to chat with you if you are interested in what helped ME.  I appaud your efforts in trying to understand and help your submissive.  I hope she finds some peace and healing from the symptoms.

(in reply to Phoenix2raven)
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/26/2007 5:27:28 AM   
HornyToadsMI


Posts: 287
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		Bless Your heart for caring so much about your sub!  I have rheumatoid arthritis, and have controlled it with diet and suppliments for the past 4 1/2 yrs.  I was on meds pretty heavy until I got pregnant with my first child.  It is amazing how you can have good days where you feel awesome, then days where you can barely drag your self out of bed.  i give your sub my happy thoughts, that their disease may lessen or a cure may be found.  i have found that if I shift or move frequently, then i am find.  If i am bound in one position for a long period of time, then i get stiff and have difficulty moving.  You may want to try changing positiions, to see if that offers better sessioning.  i can also recommend a book by Dr Jane Oelke about Fibro.  She is local here, and she has done alot of research into the disease and some ways to offer relief.  Good luck!

_____________________________

i have the best job in the world - my Boss whips me!!!

Go with your gut - yes, I am being a Smart Ass!

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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/28/2007 6:08:14 AM   
Phoenix2raven


Posts: 347
Joined: 10/14/2006
Status: offline 		Thanks for all the encouragement! I was beginning to get very frustrated with myself. I am going to try some more rituals before and after scening. Its comforting to know that I can do this with help. Thanks 

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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/30/2007 6:10:46 AM   
Manawyddan


Posts: 701
Joined: 1/2/2005
From: Petaluma (Northern California)
Status: offline 		I recommend my wife's site, immuneweb.org

_____________________________

_______________________________________________
"She always had a terrific sense of humor"
(Valerie Solonas, as described by her mother)
_______________________________________________

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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 6/30/2007 10:19:03 PM   
WayHome


Posts: 237
Joined: 8/4/2004
Status: offline 		Most people with fibromyalgia/chronic fatigue don't excercise or say they can't because it causes flareups. Unfortunately it also seems to be the only thing that can really help most people long term.

Leto

(in reply to Manawyddan)
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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 7/1/2007 7:04:21 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		Swimming is the only exercise that I can do without severe reprecussions. Thanks all the gods for swimming pools!

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 7/29/2007 7:28:06 PM   
splend


Posts: 1
Joined: 7/15/2007
Status: offline 		I think that that's great that you care so much about your sub to be posting. I'm a submissive with fibromyalgia and fortunately I have not found it to be affecting my play so far. This syndrome usually manifests itself with chronic pain and/or chronic fatigue. I have found it to be useful to force myself to make light/moderate exercise a part of my lifestyle in order to keep my symptoms under control (even though its the last thing that the body feels like doing.) Also, receiving massages, resting when my body tells me to, and eating right all contribute to symptom control. When scening, it's best for my body not to be kept in bondage or in the same position for longer than 20 mins at a time, due to the muscle pain & fatigue that so easily occurs. Finally, symptoms are often triggered or worsened as one's stress level rises... so anything to lower stress levels are usually helpful as well.

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RE: fybromyalgia/cronic fatuge syndrome - 8/1/2007 3:33:40 PM   
Incubi


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/21/2006
Status: offline 		My partner has Chronic fibromyalgia combined with arthritis, the best advice we can give is to focus on what you can do together as opposed to what you cant.
trial and error will reveal the areas you can and cannot play with but a good massage before play and a slow warmup and warmdown does help reduce resultant pain.

we wish you the very best of luck.

_____________________________

No saint am I that covets flesh, in meat and bone our spirits bound.
The body hungers and the mind is weak, time enough for spirit when the flesh is dust...

The sensualists prayer.

(in reply to splend)
Profile   Post #: 12
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