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BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 6:30:33 PM

DrPleasure

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Joined: 9/18/2004
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With regard for my personal BDSM philosophy, I don't really believe in labels and I think everyone has a bit of a dominant and a submissive within. We tend to waver throughout our lives along the spectrum of being dom or sub, but for the most part, we usually lean towards one side or the other. I think each of our dom or sub natures come out when we interact with other people. With some, its easy to lead. With others, we naturally follow. I believe that this dynamic is in everyone's nature. It is who we are as humans. BDSM culture is special in that it recognizes and celebrates this social dynamic, sometimes isolating, and sexualizing it. Every relationship, especially within BDSM, is a journey and as partners discover more about one another, a natural power dynamic develops.

Thoughts?

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 6:47:34 PM

Celeste43

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Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
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I think you're extrapolating from your personal experience. If I were to extrapolate from my personal bias I would announce that since I am uninterested in same sex relationships, no one could be bi and since I am totally sub to the right man and otherwise equal, no one could be a switch.

But since I know better than to extrapolate from my personal experience, temperment, and interests, I know there are bisexuals and switches aplenty, but I'm not one of them.

(in reply to DrPleasure)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 7:09:33 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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Personality does not equate to orientation.

Our personal intimate relationship orientation has nothing to do with who we are in general life or as a whole person.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Celeste43)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 8:34:50 PM

WhiplashSmile

Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
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My thoughts are that I'm tired of trying to analyze labels and what makes me who I am. Am I naturally dominant or not? why do I have a slight masochistic streak, why do some women make me hornier than others? Why do some people bring out more of my sadistic side while others don't? Am I really a sadistic or not? Am I really a true Masochist or not because I'm picky about the type of pain I like? I had a relationship with a Domme once, does this make me a switch or not? Does this make me less of a dom or not? Why do I micromanage at times and other times not? Why does all this crap vary from relationship to relationship, what always remains the same! Good God, pondering questions like this is like pondering the meaning of life. What does life mean to you, to me, to everybody else into BDSM? Are we Vanillas that are into BDSM, or are we so much different from Vanillas that we now consider Vanillas to be from an Alien planent or not? Blah BLah BLah BLah... my mind just wants to puke...

(in reply to DrPleasure)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 8:40:55 PM

Rastimmipitwax

Posts: 69
Joined: 6/25/2007
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Two questions:

Why does it matter?

Why do you think that everyone has a bit of dominance and submissiveness in them?

Honestly, I have known submissives who had not once trace of dominance in them, and known them long enough and well enough to have seen it if it was there at all. Sure, they can fake it, when they have to, to survive in the outside world, but it's not in their nature at all - they don't feel it, they just act it.

I can't say the same about Dominants, because I have never examined it in any level of detail. This doesn't mean I don't believe it's possible, although I know I have a submissive side that comes out occasionally, under certain uncommon circumstances.

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 9:39:34 PM

chellekitty

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i have this theory that like the gay-straight Kinsey scale there is one similar in the ranges of Top-bottom (using generic terms here to indicate side of the scale in the role not label or title or whatever)...The Kinsey scale going from 0 (exclusively hetrosexual) to 6 (entirely homosexual) and 3 being equally hetro and homo (no gender preference bisexual) ...there aren't any accurate statistics on who is what so what i could guess, would only be that, a guess...but from what i understand, very few people are 0's or 6's...
so my theory is that there is a similar scale with 0 being exclusively Top and 6 being exclusively bottom (or switch them if you wish...) and very few people are 0's or 6's ...after all i think Bob Dylan said it best with "it may be the devil or it may be the lord, but you're gonna have to serve some body"...and what kind of children would we raise if we let them be the Dominant ones (Veruca Salt comes to mind...Daddy, I want a boat....I want it NOOOOWWWWWW)
just my little thing...thought it up about 8 years ago, so if you've seen it somewhere else, they copied me, and if they came up with it before me...well...i still came up with it on my own

chelle
House Infernus
time for cookies

(in reply to Rastimmipitwax)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/26/2007 10:01:14 PM

DrPleasure

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Joined: 9/18/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rastimmipitwax

Two questions:

Why does it matter?

Why do you think that everyone has a bit of dominance and submissiveness in them?

It doesn't matter really. But, it a discussion board where ideas are thrown around...

Q2. I guess I just don't believe in absolutes.

(in reply to Rastimmipitwax)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/27/2007 2:52:34 AM

WhiplashSmile

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Is this one of those trick questions?

such as.....

If you are a Dom/me and a police were arresting you, would you submit or simply resist arrest.
If you are a submissive would you be able to control and discpline your own child?
If you are a submissive and a dog and knawing the face of a loved one off would you be able to pick up a baseball bat and beat the Dog senseless.

(in reply to DrPleasure)

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RE: BDSM Theory - 6/27/2007 6:42:54 AM

SeeksOnlyOne

Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

Is this one of those trick questions? such as.....

If you are a Dom/me and a police were arresting you, would you submit or simply resist arrest.

If you are a submissive would you be able to control and discpline your own child?

If you are a submissive and a dog and knawing the face of a loved one off would you be able to pick up a baseball bat and beat the Dog senseless.

lmfaoooooooo

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it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

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