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What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 6:28:38 AM   
allybear


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/4/2005
Status: offline 		When looking for partners online, what are traits that you look for in a profile? Not about the individual but just about how they present themselves online. What things have attracted you to profiles that you commented on? On the other side, what are warning signs to stay away from a profile? What things make you pause before contacting another collarme user?

< Message edited by allybear -- 6/22/2005 6:30:06 AM >

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"Silly Christians. The net is for freaks!"
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RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 6:34:18 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Reposted:

My profile rocks, feel free to use it as a template.

Do NOT use a profile to give you entire life philosophy of the true meaning of a dom or sub

Do NOT use a profile to ramble off the key words of bdsm- ssc, safe calls, protection, all that, it's tired, it doesn't say anything unique about yourself.

Do NOT use a profile to make any sort of rant about how sucky any other group of people or person may be. Likewise, do NOT use a profile to list off the thousand things you WON'T DO SO DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!

Don't have spelling typos or major grammatical errors in a profile.

Points for pictures, its 2005, you're online, not having a reasonable picture is silly, specially if you're looking for a relationship from online.

I'm attracted to profiles that are fairly short, 2-3 paragraphs, conversational in tone, and give me an instant snapshot of the personality behind the profile.

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 6:44:34 AM   
allybear


Posts: 14
Joined: 4/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2
Do NOT use a profile to make any sort of rant about how sucky any other group of people or person may be. Likewise, do NOT use a profile to list off the thousand things you WON'T DO SO DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!


*Laughs* Yeah, I'm guilty of that. But that's because I kept repeating myself over and over. It got old. I tend to scare away the faint hearted.

_____________________________

"Silly Christians. The net is for freaks!"

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 7:11:03 AM   
perfection20005


Posts: 419
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline 		Something that turns me off is someone who states how great they are, and how great you would be treated if you were with them.

perfection

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 7:34:00 AM   
dechala


Posts: 114
Joined: 2/20/2005
Status: offline 		i like to see thier interests outside of BDSM as well the specifics about what they are looking for in a D/s relationship.
Poetry or song lyrics always tug at my heartstrings
i like to see long winded profiles.It shows that some thought has gone into it.
i also like creative pictures and not just the standard half naked ones.

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dechala

"As soon we find a motel i'm gonna put my little honeybunny bride on the bed and tie her up.."
Natural Born Killers

(in reply to allybear)
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RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 7:52:51 AM   
MagicKnots


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Cleveland, OH
Status: offline 		Well, coming from a man's point of view, the first thing I notice is the picture. It doesn't have to be nude, but it should be clear enough to see what the person looks like.

Then I read the profile and look for a few key things.
Are they single?
Are they looking for me? (a man)
Are they local or are they willing to relocate?
Can they string together enough words to make a proper sentence?

After that, if it looks like a good fit, I'll send a short email introducing myself and asking them to check out my profile and email me back if they are interested in starting up a conversation.

So far, it's been hit and miss. However, I'm still hoping for the grand slam!

Best of luck!

_____________________________

Just J
quote:

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 9:40:42 AM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline 		I keep editing mine and it may not be a good example as I get very very few replys.
However
#1 Be honest
#2 Be yourself
#3 Do not give your life history leave something for further talks.
#4 A Good presentable photo ( no not in a dirty t-shirt holding a bottle of beer)
#5 Keep it less then 10 pages

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Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to allybear)
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RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 10:23:31 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		ANYTHING THAT DOSENT MAKE THE BITCHS RUN AWAY IN HORORR IS BASICALLY A GOOD PROFILE

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 7:35:09 PM   
slatyb


Posts: 43
Joined: 1/17/2005
Status: offline 		What do I like to see in a profile?

Correct grammar, spelling, and punctuation is a huge turn-on for me. Besides BDSM play, I want to have a conversation and a life with somebody.

Some indication that the writer is living in the real world, is responsible for her own life, and is not looking for a magic dom to somehow relieve her of all responsibility for everything forever. Maybe some doms can do that, but I doubt it. I certainly can't.

An idea of what she is looking for, instead of a list of the unacceptable. Negative profiles give me a negative impression.

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 7:54:51 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline 		I couldn't have expressed this better myself.

- LA

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RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/22/2005 8:47:43 PM   
LadyofLadies


Posts: 1
Joined: 5/18/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slatyb

What do I like to see in a profile?

Correct grammar, spelling, and punctuation is a huge turn-on for me. Besides BDSM play, I want to have a conversation and a life with somebody.



You are SO right! Cute little pictures and catch-phrases mean nothing to me. I'm looking for intelligence, and I'm hard-pressed to find them in a lot of these profiles. I can't tell you how many profiles I've scanned--from Doms and subs alike--where my opinion of the writer gets lower with every misspelled word I see. Don't even get me started with the run-on sentences that I have to decode. Proofread, please! Your mistakes say more about you than your words. But don't let me stay on that; we'll be here all day.

The other things that make a good profile is clarity. Have something to say and say it. Tell us who you are, what you're about, and what you're looking for on this site. Save the rest of the stuff (like how wonderful your Master/Mistress/Dominant is, personal opinions, tributes to yourself, mindless ramblings) for your journal.

Please don't blather on about how you don't have anything to say. If that's the case, then wait until you do have something to say. You can always go back and edit later. It's best to keep silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

Try to think of it this way....you are selling/promoting yourself in your profile. First impressions go far. Dominants, pretend that you just strolled into a roomful of potential submissives who don't know you and have never heard of you. Submissives, pretend that you are "on the block", as it were, and you are your own Auctioneer. Give us reasons to want what you are offering.

My two biggest warning signs to avoid this person....

1) pictures with unclear or blotted out faces. Why bother to post the thing if I can't see what you look like? If you're "shy" for whatever reason, just give it to me privately. I don't post mine because I have a website of pictures for the person brave enough to email me.

2) pictures of body parts other than your face, especially when accompanied by a badly written profile. If you don't have anything more to offer than breasts and/or a butt, why should I bother?

I hope I'm not just talking to myself.



< Message edited by LadyofLadies -- 6/23/2005 10:20:14 AM >

_____________________________

Ms. Chantal
www.chantalsauvage.com
"A diamond is a lump of coal that did well under extreme pressure."

(in reply to slatyb)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 4:58:23 AM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

When looking for partners online, what are traits that you look for in a profile?


I'm going to repurpose bit of a another post which seems to have gotten lost in between the posts of an argument ;)

This is more from the perspective of how I write my profile, but I think that I can recognise if someone has done exactly this and it most definitely is something that will impress me.

When I took writing classes, my professor always told me, write to your target audience and write what you know. Well my target audience are mature, stable, articulate and intelligent men and women who have an attention for detail and a curious mind... for starters ;)

I'd rather have a long, detailed, articulate profile that will attract exactly the kind of person I want to attract rather then have one that pleases the masses and doesn't act as a filter of sorts.

I get some troll mail but very little. On the flip side, I get about an email a week with a compliment on my profile. Some of these people have become online acquaintances.

- LA


_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 12:46:35 PM   
Faramir


Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allybear

When looking for partners online, what are traits that you look for in a profile? Not about the individual but just about how they present themselves online.


One thing I might notice right away would be a sigline that treats other people with contempt - that marginalizes groups of other people based on sex, race or faith. A person who has so little regard for others, and who feels the need to broadcast their narrowmindedness, wouldn't be someone I'd want much social intercourse with.

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 1:39:54 PM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
A well written, articulate profile or postings or letters which contains no hint of racism, superiority, or religious hatred. No mention of real. No mention of true. No lists of needs, desires or fantasy. An Imagination. No contempt. Signs of contentment and self realisation. No statements on how a person helps others 'evolve'. A good picture or avatar. A suggestion of irony, but not ridicule. And a sense of peace.

Recommended Profiles -
Lady Angelica
BeachMystress
Onceburned
Faramir
EmeraldSlave2
TonyBFG
dragonofjapan
afmvdp
DreamweaverAZ
GoddessJules


Peace and Love

_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to allybear)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 1:57:31 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Lady Angelica


Hmmm... what is Daemon's handle again so I can get him to swat you for mispelling my name... <weg>

- LadyAngelika

P.S.: Coming from you, being selected as one of the good profiles is an honour :)

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 1:58:00 PM   
Pavel


Posts: 308
Joined: 1/10/2005
From: Washington
Status: offline 		I really just look for things that are interesting. I tend to surf screen names (the classic "hey that looks intersting I'm gonna go poke it!" response). Things that cause me to very quickly lose interest in the profile;

1. Really really bad spelling/cutsey sortening of words (luv, U, ur, etc all make me want to weep for English teachers everywhere),

2. Anything much in the form of self praise (confidence is good, confidence is sexy, telling me that by reading your profile you'll make me want to drop to my knees and submit, not so appealing),

3. Threats of violence against penguins (hey, go beat up somthing that isn't flightless!),

4. Or statements of worthlessness (oh boy! you're a worthless pathetic subbie girl/boy/lawyer, that's so appealing to have someone who appears to have the confidence and strength of a wet noodle).

Really short profiles also are bad if you're looking to attract attention. Especially if the only information you give is what we already have from the metrics (age, place of residence, etc, etc).

Good profiles in my opinion make me smile at least once (humor is good!), tell me a bit about the person's mindset, and tell me about the person outside of BDSM. Also, if it was possible to win prizes for reading profiles, or get free beer for reading the really long ones, I wouldn't object much at all.

(in reply to Faramir)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 2:08:51 PM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
OMGosh.... total and utter failiure on my part!

Please forgive me Lady A. Demon is quite happy for a punishment to be issued at your wish! (As long as it doesn't break the skin, He quotes with an evil grin) -

Peace and Love

_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 2:15:43 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dark~angel

OMGosh.... total and utter failiure on my part!

Please forgive me Lady A. Demon is quite happy for a punishment to be issued at your wish! (As long as it doesn't break the skin, He quotes with an evil grin) -

Peace and Love


Oh goodie goodie!! Merci Demon!!

How about 11 nice stinging swats of the belt... just to remind you that K is the 11th letter of the alphabet ;)

Probably expecting much harsher from me, I know. But considering I like you and all... :) Enjoy!

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to darkinshadows)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 2:17:15 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

3. Threats of violence against penguins (hey, go beat up somthing that isn't flightless!),


Another penguin lover! Oh I'm so with you on this one ;)

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to Pavel)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What makes a good profile? - 6/23/2005 2:25:32 PM   
DemonAngel


Posts: 36
Joined: 5/1/2005
Status: offline 		To the beautiful Lady Angelika
My Angel is of course in need of discipline!I think that all this moving has put her head in the clouds,lol, either that or the thought of you coming to the UK making her overexcite!Please accept her apology and know that if you decide a punishment it will be carried out.Just let her know via a mail on the other sides when you wish.I do hope you are keeping well.

Demon

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 20
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