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RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 12:38:11 AM

Gauge

Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

How bad is cursing by a submissive? Might my Dom (should i ever find one) allow it, all things considered? Has anyone else faced this and learnt to stop cursing? How did you do it?

I worked in the trades doing construction work and other things. Construction sites will never ever be mistaken for a Sunday church service. When my job took me into customers homes I had to deal with the general public. There was no way to know if the person I was dealing with found swearing offensive or not therefore, I refrained from swearing. It is a choice you make. It might take a little mental self-discipline but it can be done.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 21

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 12:51:05 AM

fillepink

Posts: 124
Status: offline

quote:

i'm not allowed to curse. It slips, if i get carried away. i used to have a foul mouth as well. Terribly foul. But i just thought before i spoke and if i cursed (on my own) i would mentally think of a replacement.

RG..if i thought before i spoke, i'd probably be govenor of Pennsylvania, ROFL. i was thinking there might be programs like there are to stop smoking; Yanno; support groups or s'thing. i most DEFINATELY do not want my Dom to discipline this trait out of me (has visions of the rack..the steel madien..LOL).

RG; please send me yr "f**k to noncurse word" vocab list, ok? myself, i lack imagination i guess -- but i cannot think of another word besides f**k that communicates effectively in some circumstancrs. i will also need replacements for a**hole; mother f****r; clusterf**k; and so forrth. ty you so much, dear.

fillepink

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< Message edited by fillepink -- 7/2/2005 12:58:21 AM >

(in reply to RiotGirl)

Post #: 22

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 1:09:19 AM

fillepink

Posts: 124
Status: offline

quote:

There was no way to know if the person I was dealing with found swearing offensive or not therefore, I refrained from swearing. It is a choice you make. It might take a little mental self-discipline but it can be done.

sorry to be posting one right after another; i cannot figure out how to insert more than one quote into a post. so, 1st, i'd appreciate it if someone could tell me.

Gauge..i have used "mental discipline" and have cleaned up my mouth considerably, but when you begin in NYC it takes awhile to reach Seattle. i even used to use f**king as an extra syllable to express emphasis on an adjective. For example.."susf*kingpicious".

Nowadays i'm down to blasphame (which i truely regret) and the usual "words you cannot say on tv". (That will not make any sense to anyoe who is not my age; nowadays all the words are on tv.)

so in say, 40 yrs, i've made some progress, LMAO.

fillepink

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< Message edited by fillepink -- 7/2/2005 1:14:39 AM >

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 23

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 5:18:55 AM

RandBcouple

Posts: 86
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline

curse words never just slip out, in my case...but i do say them, just depends who i am talking to. IE, with my Master i try not to curse, if the mood is very relaxed and we're joking around i might let one slip but if i am talking to my girl friends i'll just let it all hang out lol...i think there's a time and a place, just like with everything...if i'm at work i won't say "oh that fucking fax machine!" lol...but if i'm sitting around with some close friends or on the phone with them then i'll probably curse my ass off. lol...specially if i'm upset or excited about something. i'm not offended by people who curse tho, there are worse things. : )

~hugs~
Babygirl

(in reply to RiotGirl)

Post #: 24

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 6:10:35 AM

Gauge

Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Nowadays i'm down to blasphame (which i truely regret) and the usual "words you cannot say on tv". (That will not make any sense to anyoe who is not my age; nowadays all the words are on tv.)

so in say, 40 yrs, i've made some progress, LMAO.

Well, it is progress.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 25

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 6:27:15 AM

imtempting

Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

I feel swearing has its place and it does not have it place. Ive been bought up not too swear all the time but in certain times its ok.

If my Dominant swore all the time id actually tell her thats something I want changed. It won't be a ... May you stop swearing, it will be a... Stop swearing as its something i don't like.

Swearing has its place in the bedroom

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 26

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 7:30:59 AM

fillepink

Posts: 124
Status: offline

everyone please go to General Discussions and offer an opinion on a support group for people who want to quit swearing. Thank You.

fillepink

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(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 27

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 10:07:52 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

I think swearing is a problem only if you can't control it. If you've reached the point that you can't stop swearing even in formal or public situations, then that might be a problem. But I don't see what's wrong with cursing in private or among friends. You're not going to go to hell for it.

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 28

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 10:27:02 AM

RexLongBeach

Posts: 58
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: fillepink
How bad is cursing by a submissive? Might my Dom (should i ever find one) allow it, all things considered? Has anyone else faced this and learnt to stop cursing? How did you do it?

As others have already said, cursing is in the eye of the beholder. Some Doms allow it, others are ok with it in moderation, and some don't allow it. You are by no means doomed to Domlessness if you have a potty mouth, but it does limit the selection to some extent.

The key to stopping is first (a) truly wanting to and then (b) being aware of it when you do. If a prospective Dom isn't going to allow you your usual colorful language, he's probably going to be willing to help you stop.

In practice, swearing usually comes out when a conversation has turned from basic chit chat to a topic you have some feelings about. The carefully considered words become a stream of consciousness, and the emotional punctuation of profanity kicks in.

The Dom can interrupt this stream of invective and require you to say whatever it is you were trying to say, but without swearing. By stopping you and requiring you to restate your point properly, your awareness grows pretty quickly. When necessary, mild negative reinforcement (aka punishments) can be administered "in the moment" to help you focus on your task.

Have a profanity free day!

Rex

(in reply to fillepink)

Post #: 29

RE: Cursing - 7/2/2005 11:05:29 AM

nonuts4thshoney

Posts: 550
Joined: 6/12/2005
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

Swearing has its place in the bedroom

i try not to swear in front of Master out of respect. i don't feel it is lady like in my not-so-vanilla lifestyle. LMAO!

However, i don't do it as often as she would like, but Master enjoys when i swear in the bedroom.

FUCK SHIT OMG..FUCK SHIT OMG...LOL! Master loves this.

-carolyn

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 30

RE: Cursing - 7/4/2005 10:33:21 PM

SirDiscipliner69

Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline

I always felt that it was the lack of ability to express oneself when cursing...

To Me for a sub to do so shows disrespect and should be dealt with appropriately...be it soap bar in the mouth or crop...

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

Post #: 31

RE: Cursing - 7/4/2005 10:46:04 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

I totally fucking disagree.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

I always felt that it was the lack of ability to express oneself when cursing...

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 32

RE: Cursing - 7/5/2005 8:19:01 AM

pleasureforHim

Posts: 171
Joined: 7/2/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

I always felt that it was the lack of ability to express oneself when cursing...

Sir Discipline..."Get the fuck outta my house or i'm calling the cops!"

"Get the fuck away!"

"Fuck you and the horse you rode in on."

"Fuck me baby Fuck me hard."

"o Fuck."

etc.

pleasureforHim

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 33

RE: Cursing - 7/5/2005 9:31:29 AM

slavedesires

Posts: 669
Joined: 3/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

I always felt that it was the lack of ability to express oneself when cursing...

To Me for a sub to do so shows disrespect and should be dealt with appropriately...be it soap bar in the mouth or crop...

well hell, i wont go as far as PleasureforHim or LnM did, but i do agree in theory.
If this is your philosphy, your girl will obey you.

i was told growing up cursing words was the devils playhouse....
and also that it was the inability to express myself "decently"......

well.... i do express myself well and sometimes too well and must apolgize.

~~shy

_____________________________

i speak only my personal opinion, sometimes O/ours.

"i am the keeper of fragile things and i have kept what is indisolvable."
....the greatest gift.....vulnerability

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 34

RE: Cursing - 7/5/2005 1:06:08 PM

nonuts4thshoney

Posts: 550
Joined: 6/12/2005
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

I always felt that it was the lack of ability to express oneself when cursing...

To Me for a sub to do so shows disrespect and should be dealt with appropriately...be it soap bar in the mouth or crop...

Sir i don't know if its a lack of ability, but more of developing a bad habit Sir. i do my best not to use foul language only because i feel it is not lady like. i like staying sweet. On occasion i do say WTF (the whole thing) but that is when something really baffles me and they happen to be the first words that slip out.

As a child i was taught using foul language was a bad thing and that it was never appropriate to use. my family never did, but if i ever heard the word "shit" i knew something was really wrong..LOL!!

i try (as i stated in an post above) that i try not to use it around Master because i do not want to sound disrespectful. i dunno if soap would work in my opinion. i'd probably curse more if that was a method used on me and i'd like the crop..

. To me if one has cursed most of their lives it may not be an easy think to break. Maybe there are books on how to curb ones foul language habit. " Stop Cursing for Dummies " LOL!!!

-carolyn

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)

Post #: 35

RE: Cursing - 7/5/2005 8:07:30 PM

SirDiscipliner69

Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline

I guess I didn't mention I cuss and curse all the time did I?

Actually I feel there is a time when and a time not to...if front of a sub for Me personally is not appropriate...

Glad there were some responses....

(in reply to nonuts4thshoney)

Post #: 36

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