Secretary

Secretary (Full Version)

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wwsmith -> Secretary (8/9/2007 10:25:37 AM)
Got to thinking about Secretary (the movie) lately as I'm writing job adds (not saying I'm hiring anyone, for legal reasons of course:-). But what would folks look for /put in a job advert for their local paper if they thought someone like Lee would work out well? Skilled with cutlery? Able to lift odd objects? Flexible? Takes dictation willingly? Accepts pointed correction well? (this is purely for entertainment purposes, of course, I would never use these ideas in an actual advert:-).

slaveish -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 10:35:45 AM)
Will crawl through dumpsters to find any given object.

velvetears -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 11:02:07 AM)
Come with my own supply or red marking pens [:)]

came4U -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 11:21:19 AM)
maybe mention that you will watch her 'peas and cues'? the job requires long hours of sitting (with few bathroom breaks). she must have a 'cutting' sense of humour. her mistakes will be talied and strict discipline action would occur. she must love vegetables, especially carrots, and be able to carry at least 9lbs of weight (not lifting from the knees). oh ya, and she must have her own transportation since the position is not on an available bus route. Walking is suitable.

Cyntilating -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 12:12:41 PM)
......accomplished at taking DICKtation ... ?? grinz

mnottertail -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 12:14:43 PM)
Sexretary wanted Must have profound oral skills. Know, or be willing to learn the ropes. Typing is unnecessary. Ron

slaveish -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 12:49:48 PM)
Must not include worms in any correspondence.

dawntreader -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:07:13 PM)
Love it - i think i would qualify for this job!LOL!

mnottertail -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:14:41 PM)
being able to crouch nakedly on a piano (whether or not she can play it) is also essential

dawntreader -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:20:34 PM)
ROFL!! i do believe my crouching and kneeling skills far surpass my piano skills! Now if i was a better piano player - i am sure my typing skills would improve as well :-) So, while i am good at dicktation, my transcription skills suck~

mnottertail -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:21:40 PM)
sucking is a workable skill. how are you at cooking?

dawntreader -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:33:12 PM)
If it has 5 ingredients or less, i am good! i prefer playing in the kitchen as opposed to actually cooking in it~ However, i have been told my pasta dishes and my homemade beef jerky are very good, and i can bake bread!~ Back to "the Secretary" i need one myself - i have to replace a scanner/printer that i broke during a temper-tantrum at its ineptness to print without pulling 5 sheetes of paper each time! Oi!

mnottertail -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:36:03 PM)
it may not be totally broke unless you lost your center. when they do that the rollers and paper pathway have to be cleaned with great care, it does that by crud building on the rollers and paper dust in the pathway. Ron

dawntreader -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 1:41:04 PM)
Thanks Ron, but i shattered the glass of the scanner with my hand :-( ... i am embarressed but i was not feeling good (just had another back surgery on tuesday) and in my frustration i slammed it and it broke~ i never get angry like that so i can only blame it on the meds they had me on :-( So, what might have been an easy fix is no longer~

came4U -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 2:00:36 PM)
Mr. Mnottertail: did you know that Liberache was greeeeat at playing the piano but he sucked on the organ?? teeheee

nmjardine -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 2:13:38 PM)
Gorgeous pic, dawntreader! I wish I could look half as good near a piano.

dawntreader -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 2:42:17 PM)
Thankyou! Being a power hiker has it's advantages!

slaverosebeauty -> RE: Secretary (8/9/2007 9:04:04 PM)
You rang?! I was sent an ad a few weeks back from a lawyer friend who was asking me to be his 'Secretary', yes, he knows I am in a relationship, he would respect that, lol. His ad was simple.. it ran for 2 weeks [I am already on assignment for the next few months].... Legal Secretary Wanted. Requirements - Strong Comunication Skills; Professional Dress; Able to take dictation and through notes. MUST be able to lift files and boxes from floor to chest level. Send Resume..... The one I recieved ... "Legal Secretary Desired. MUST like being tied to her work and to bound to responsibilites. Oral skills are a MUST, as are shorthand, long hand, long hours and night meetings. Professional Dress and demeanor. Qualifications, referances, desired dress code and hours to be sent to...."

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