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Submissive men - 8/10/2007 8:51:35 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		I was talking with a girlfriend today and we started talking about submissive men...she said they only want Dominant women, and I disagreed...I would love to hear your opinion.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 8:54:30 PM   
RaynaSub


Posts: 185
Joined: 9/3/2006
Status: offline 		Many of the submissive men online want whomever they can get.
Half of my email has always been from submissive men.
Also, many men online are submissive one month and Dominant the next month.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 8:58:04 PM   
Saint


Posts: 279
Status: offline 		Well of course, not to sound shallow but if a woman isnt Dominant than she is generally boring to me in a relationship sense. I make enough decisions in my everyday life that the last thing I want to do is make them in a relationship. It is what it is. It is not a negative thing to want to serve a Dominant person. I guess it would be best to say that I dont like feeling dominant myself with a partner and most non-Dominant women make me feel that way.

_____________________________

"Anonymity is synonymous with longevity."
Faethor Ferenczy

"I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel tonight"
Nightwish - Wish I had an Angel Tonight

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 9:48:20 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		LOL she kinda forgot about all the homosexuals I guess.

And there are sub/sub couples and poly situations for certain.

Tell her to remember that if you can think of it, it exists, and very happily, and not be so quick to deny what humans can find fulfillment in.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Saint)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 10:52:02 PM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		I know there is such a thing as sub-sub (hetero and homsexual) couples, but I mostly figure that although these folks genuinely probably do care for and maybe love eachother a lot, that they maybe got together before one realized the other was a submissive, and that their solution is that both get to be Dominated by others (or whatever). Maybe not, I could be wrong about that.

I am not saying that I don't think a submissive (hetero) man couldn't find a submissive or Vanilla female attractive, and maybe even want to have sex with her, and appreciate her as a person (a hetero or homosexual male submissive), etc. - But IMO, if a submissive man says he doesn't want to Dominate you, I think he should be taken seriously.

A man I am currently interested in is submissive, and he is aware I am a Switch. He has no desire whatsoever to Dominate me, and I am not going to request that of him. He knows I will eventually probably need to find an outlet for my desire to be occasionally Dominated, and he is okay with that.

- Susan 

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 8/10/2007 10:57:06 PM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 10:55:29 PM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

I was talking with a girlfriend today and we started talking about submissive men...she said they only want Dominant women, and I disagreed...I would love to hear your opinion.


for me, this is true. i certainly don't want a Dominant Male (or any male, for that matter). also, i am open to friendships with fem subs.


_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 11:43:59 PM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline 		Rosalind Russell said,

"Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death"

i have no intention of starving to death!

i am a submissive for many, many reasons and seek Dominants of Difference
for many, many reasons, even a submissive or two might catch my eye.

Michael, Michael, Michael! (Just kidding dude, we know, we know)

chia* (the pet) 

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Submissive men - 8/10/2007 11:49:52 PM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline 		huh?

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 7:35:34 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Many sub men want anyone they can get.  I can't tell you the number of times I've received email such as "I'd switch for you."  "I can switch."  "I can be dom, really."  It smacks of desperation and is such a turnoff.  I wonder if they know how it looks when they make those sorts of comments to female subs.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 7:51:25 AM   
e01n


Posts: 1472
Status: offline 		Looking through the previous posts, I think Susan's probably the most accurate of the reality of RL relationships: my experience has been that things will seek their own level without much effort and I'm at my best by staying flexible about what needs to happen next. If it feels right, do it... and if it doesn't, wait until it does.

I only identify as switch because no one really offers a checkbox that says the above...

NB: I'm referring to real life human males. Online's a different story. Sounds like KatyLied has encountered more than a few Horny Net Guys sans clue... It's a stupid song they sing, but every word they sing is true. They WOULD compromise themselves to an untenable position because they've built up getting laid to the point of being the pinnacle of human experience. And the results are utterly disastrous...

Just my $0.02

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 8:05:46 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50
...I would love to hear your opinion.



it has been this slave's experience that generalizations make a distinctive sucking sound, as they pave the path of those who follow The One True Way.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 8:07:10 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet
Rosalind Russell said,

"Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death"

It should be clarified that the incomparably fabulous Rosalind said that line while playing the divine Auntie Mame, and not as a personal statement.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 8:38:04 AM   
arayofsunshine55


Posts: 545
Joined: 8/1/2004
From: San Francisco, CA
Status: offline 		Many of the submisive men I come across are married to women who are not dominant.  And most of those women are not submissive either.

_____________________________

Sunshine

Is it not most transformative, most earthshaking, to pierce the veils of self-deception and illusion, and crack the eggshell of ignorance, to most intimately encounter oneself? Lama Surya Das

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 8:47:40 AM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Many sub men want anyone they can get.  I can't tell you the number of times I've received email such as "I'd switch for you."  "I can switch."  "I can be dom, really."  It smacks of desperation and is such a turnoff.  I wonder if they know how it looks when they make those sorts of comments to female subs.


Katy, I get alot of the same mail from submissive men, saying they would switch for me.  And it is a turnoff. 

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 9:23:41 AM   
twistedkytten


Posts: 240
Joined: 9/8/2006
Status: offline 		i lived for a while with a Dominant Woman.. we used to laugh because i would recieve an email from a male that was dominant, She would recieve an email from the same, swearing he was submissive... on few occassions i would come home finding them ass up and begging.. which never bothered me.. *g*

_____________________________

Obedience is life, girl lives to serve her Master

(in reply to cuddleheart50)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 9:53:17 AM   
pollux


Posts: 657
Joined: 7/26/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Many sub men want anyone they can get.  I can't tell you the number of times I've received email such as "I'd switch for you."  "I can switch."  "I can be dom, really."  It smacks of desperation and is such a turnoff.  I wonder if they know how it looks when they make those sorts of comments to female subs.


Good grief, as if sub men had somehow cornered the market on desperation around here.

Would you like me to forward all the email I've received from sub women who mention that they're now ready to explore their dominant side?  Or from dominant women who say that being on top can be exhausting and they wouldn't mind a little detour into submission or bottoming from time to time?  Just to recharge?

HEAVEN FORFEND people want to step out of CollarMe's six designated pigeonholes for everyone to explore something new, or to engage someone who they find is an attractive human being.  Or that -- NEWSFLASH!! STOP THE PRESSES!! -- there are wounded, desperate people here, too.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 10:01:01 AM   
shyboy66


Posts: 7
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
FMany sub men want anyone they can get.  I can't tell you the number of times I've received email such as "I'd switch for you."  "I can switch."  "I can be dom, really."  It smacks of desperation and is such a turnoff.  I wonder if they know how it looks when they make those sorts of comments to female subs

Funny, I thought it was more the other way - dom men subbing for the 'Right' Domme....  as for me, i've so far had 4 lovely femsubs approach me in the hope that i'd be a dom to them (r/l., not on CM) - and in two of those case i would have if i could have... unfortunately there's not a dom bone in this body and i'm proud of it :) .



(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 10:10:12 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		The comment wasnt saying that there ARENT the same responses rom the sub women. Cuddles specifically mentioned sub men, so that was the concentration. I have gotten messages from Domme women and Dom men asking to sub for me. I have gotten messages from sub men asking to sub for me, and offering to Dom Angel if it would make me happy, or sub to Angel if thats what I wanted.
What a Dominant or a submissive wants in the realm of BDSM and what they might want in a relationship do not have to match. Many subs I know prefer a romantic connection with a fellow sub, or a vanilla with no connection to the lifestyle. They are not full time submissives and dont really wish to be, so they dont want to be in a relationship with someone who IS in that role constantly. There are a lot of submissive men who are only sub when the mood strikes them, not all the time. When they want to play, they do want a Dominant woman (usually) but not as a regular thing.  I also know a few who can only sub to a stronger Dominant Man, even though they are straight. When they are sexually aroused, they cant be submissive, so they seek to serve someone they have no sexual interest in.
It takes all kinds.
DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to shyboy66)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 12:16:38 PM   
Einzelganger


Posts: 221
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Orlando, FL
Status: offline 		I seriously doubt that everyone who claims to be a male sub really is a male sub.  It never ceases to amaze me how many guys I've met claim to be real subs, knowing full well they're lying, just for the sake of getting kinky sex.  In my humble opinion, it's stealing to lie for the sake of one's own selfish pleasures without taking the other individual's feelings, time, or needs into consideration.  But maybe that's just me.

-Einzelgänger

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Submissive men - 8/11/2007 12:20:43 PM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline 		well, not all men are out for sex. if this were the case, i would just pay a PRO and be done with it. but my submission is very real.

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to Einzelganger)
Profile   Post #: 20
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