what would you do? lol

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

what would you do? lol

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> what would you do? lol

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 10:46:58 AM

zaynab

Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

this hasn't happened to me yet, thank god. but what would you do if you were clicking around on here and suddenly saw that one of your adult kids had joined this site and there you are.... staring at their photo?

would you....
1) find a new site yourself and not tell them you were even on here
2) stay and ask them to find a new site
3) other

if this ever happens to me, i could not post here anymore if one of them were here.... but what would you do?

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 10:51:00 AM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

Well, I don't have any kids, but my younger brother was on here for a while (he lives in New England), I just signed on one day and there was his picture. That was a shock for me, but he was much more suprised when I emailed him to say hello

We both stayed on the site, although he never posted here we saw each other from time to time and wrote back and forth for a while.
He is married now and has taken down his profile, but I think he still clicks around from time to time.

(in reply to zaynab)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 11:59:49 AM

MaitresseEden

Posts: 477
Joined: 8/8/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline

If you stay in the scene long enough, eventually you will run into someone you know on a personal vanilla way. It is inevitable. In my opinion the worse thing you can do is run and deny it. Denial is saying you are ashamed of who you are and what you are doing. While I will agree that it is prudent to exercise discretion for a myriad of reason, and there is no need to be constantly waving a banner of kink pride for all to see, if you encounter someone you know on a kink sight, they came to it because they too were curious, so be honest about it, and don't be ashamed. As for your adult children, I can't imagine not recognizeing tendencies in my child long before they do. I would not be surprised in the least, nor would I feel the need to hide my own tendencies from them. I am quite certain my daughter already knows I am dominant, and I have a certain standard that I expect men to adhere to, this includes her boyfriends as well. Now that doesn't mean she understands the sexual and kinky aspects of my personality, but she herself shares my standards and we frequently talk about them.

Ms. Eden

_____________________________

"If I didnt define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other peoples fantasies for me and eaten alive. - Audre Lorde"

(in reply to siamsa24)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 1:09:46 PM

tigress31047

Posts: 98
Joined: 4/26/2005
Status: offline

both my adult daughters know about my choice to be in the lifestyle. My one daughter was my safe call contact when I met Master the first time. I have even encouraged them to this site to read post and maybe get answers to questions I have been unable to answer for them. I recognize the submissive qualities in my youngest daughter so if I ever saw her registered at this site I would send her a welcome message and hopefully be able to steer her in the right direction. I have always encouraged honesty and open communication with my children. I felt that by telling them about this it would save any blowups and misunderstandings in the future.

(in reply to MaitresseEden)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 1:38:07 PM

zaynab

Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

i agree with everyone, but still..... i'm their mom..... i dont want to them to be any part of my sex life and vice versa, even if it is only messaging and chatting on a website like this great one... lol

(in reply to zaynab)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 3:20:39 PM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

i'm their mom.....

There was a BDSM chatroom that I used to go to all the time and I fully understand what you are saying, there were quite a few there that had difficulty dealing with the fact that many times that I was in there my son was there as well. I've never been secretive about who I am or how I feel and have found that because of that my kids will come to me and talk to me about anything. As their mom, what ever they are seeking to find, I will do my best, offer my advice and guidance whenever they need it, and will, hopefully, show them the safest path to their own personal fulfillment.

My openness and honesty over the years has paid off in so many amazing ways. As I have said before, I can't imagine how it feels to have to keep your life choices a secret. For me personally, and it is my own feelings and my own opinion, to hide something is the same as saying "I'm ashamed of it and there is something wrong with it". My kids were raised knowing that their mom was kinda kinky, (No, I never "acted" out in front of them, but it's hard to hide chains on a waterbed) and because of that there was no "bombshell" to drop on them as adults, just a long slow path to understanding. They are all grown now and not to long ago my daughter stopped by and told us that her girlfriend had displayed some "submissive" tendencies and before she left she had asked to "borrow" (anyone with kids knows that's code for "mine to keep") a flogger and some suspension cuffs. Not only did we give her the flogger and cuffs, but showed her how to use them (a service they don't offer online). My son had shown an interest in a violet wand... again, both him and his wife were shown how to use one safely... that's an expensive toy they will have to buy for themselves. Not in the slightest bit embarrassing to me, no different then teaching them the proper way to ride a bike or drive a car.

And no, I'm not saying this is right for everyone, to each there own.

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to zaynab)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 3:46:55 PM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

I would do no different than anything else we have had deal with as they mature. I would much rather they know they can come to me for ANY questions or concerns they may have. I would much rather it be my advice they follow as opposed to a complete stranger.

I am fortunate to have this type of relationship with them & I would never let anything they wish to explore or do damage the communication & trust we have now.

MstrssPassion

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 4:00:32 PM

Isolde

Posts: 213
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: Hamilton, Ontario
Status: offline

That's a good question. I would like to say that I'm comfortable enough with myself that it wouldn't bother me but I'm still shaking the attitude that everything having to do with sex has to stay in the bedroom and other people must not find out. I'm pretty open about that sort of thing here on these boards but that's because I don't know you people from Adam and it doesn't really affect me, what people might think of me here.

My son, on the other hand... I don't know. I haven't even come out to my mother yet and we're very open about discussing sex. So it might depend on the person he is once he grows up, how close we are, whether or not he freaked out if and when he accidently walked in on my husband and I during an intimate moment, whether or not I have the sort of relationship with him in twenty years that I have with my mother...

We should flip the question around and see how many people would run screaming if they happened across their parents' profile here, complete with naughty pictures.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 5:05:24 PM

Mandalin

Posts: 103
Joined: 2/7/2005
Status: offline

This just happened to me a couple of days ago. I was emailed by someone who lives 30 miles from me, along with a picture of themself, but it was kind of distant and a little fuzzy. I emailed him back and told him he looked very familar and asked him if he'd ever been to a place I go to alot in his city. He said no, and we've been emailing back and forth....then he told me where he worked, and I instantly knew how he was! I told him and he also knows who I am because we have the same friends....now he's scared I'm going to tell them he's on here....I would never do such a thing...but I think it's really neat meeting him on here after so many years!

_____________________________

Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and let us play

(in reply to Isolde)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: what would you do? lol - 7/3/2005 9:35:37 PM

zaynab

Posts: 377
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

im not hiding anything, heck, in my house that would be a real miracle....

after raising 5 kids predominantly on my own and the past 8 years doing that with my Dom's help.... i want at least ONE part of my life private! I think my sex life is a good part to pick! lol

_____________________________

zaynab[DM]