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RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 4:56:42 PM   
earthycouple


Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fungasm

---
For Ms. D (Earthycouple):   I do ramble.  I am very pedantic. Sorry.  You can choose not to read what I write. I shared a bit of what I do.  It's not meant to be advertising- but to explain why I'm asking.  As you can tell the question was complicated enough without a "why does it matter".   You did an "ahem" on a previous post.  Others wrote me directly and said that they were interested in hearing about this since it's FREE.  My blog, the link in my signature:  Free.  Sharing what happens with my toys: Free.  I'm sharing an experience that you never have to pay for.  So I don't know why you are bothered by it.  But you were the only one who said anything.   I am not here to find new toys.  This is a place where I can talk about what I'm doing with them, and hopefully get feedback when I have a question (something that was covered in a different post).  Like now, I had a question.  If you don't like my questions, go read something else, or write your own. If you catch me trolling for toys, you can nail me on it- but that's not what this is.   

We are all here to share.  like you can talk about your life and gaining/losing Robert and the joys of combining a family.  I asked a question of subs, and while I appreciate that a Domme answers, it would have been nice if you had actually answered the question. Would it piss you off if you told your sub no hands, and he made himself feel pleasure anyway?  Would you feel he violated your trust/arrangement if he learned how to do this under your watch without you?

Alison






Who said I'm bothered?  Who said I cared what you posted?  I actually read your post, took my take and you took offense by saying something like I'll never post here again.

You chose to post again and in such a way that we still don't get half of what you say.  That's not our collective fault and because you can use the word "pedantic" doesn't mean your posts are now clarified.  When someone has to try and translate for you vs. ask pointed questions...fine do it.  But don't piss and moan at me for giving my take on it when you do.  Just like we can both start threads...we can both answer them.  Can't have your cake and eat it too. 

I was answering the question of the people who didn't get your OP.  It had nothing to do with anything more. 

I wouldn't worry about a sub who touched himself when he's not supposed to...because he wouldn't be mine.  I don't have people I don't trust.  If I'm a fool in that, so be it. 

No.  if he learns to control his body in such a way hands free then more power to him and damn it, teach me how. 

So...Ms. Pedantic...why couldn't you ask these questions pointedly before..you did just fine this time.

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to fungasm)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 5:09:32 PM   
RavensDreamer


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vampyrefledgling

If I could summon an orgasm without any kind of physical contact I would probably be the happiest woman alive!

~Fledgling



Agree so much! It would help me save money for things besides pleasure toys =)
Then again if one can/could do that, why would you need a partner?

(in reply to Vampyrefledgling)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 5:23:32 PM   
Cyntilating


Posts: 581
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline 		 
well, I read and then reread..and then read it again....
and it sure sounds like #1 and #2 questions are the same...
so,
 if you say " no hands"  but then leave it at that> and she/he becomes flushed..aroused...orgazmic....but DIDNT use hands> well I don't see that as crossing your boundary...no hands were used....if you dont want them to cum/climax it would seem to me then that that is what you need to be explicit about.
  do not orgazm..
how you control someone from getting aroused tho'...hmm..like LA said > that happens at the darndest times...without intentions sometimes..but is that really a horrible thing?
or something they " did against you or to be disobedient" <<<< that would seem to be a more appropriate concern, than rather they got excited.
 
as to #3....
I still dont understand your point  lol  sorry.

_____________________________

Cyndi

.."There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. " Edith Wharton

(in reply to RavensDreamer)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 5:25:07 PM   
Drifa


Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
Status: offline
quote:


* When you are in a scene and it's "no hands", does that mean you are not supposed to have an erotic response?


It would depend on what my Lady wants. But usually she is trying for an erotic response. In a scene, this isn't usually one of the things we go for - but on a vacation driving miles cross-country, she can and has talked me into orgasm after orgasm. And when I play online it's all no hands... there it doesn't matter whether I come or not, because shortly I'll be telling the story to my Lady and most generally she's going to see to it that there is plenty of sensation after that.

quote:


* Would the ability to have an orgasm while bound or the ability to bring yourself pleasure without touch violate in some way the basic elements of your d/s relationship?


We worked at getting that response - I can't just be sitting cold and hear the command and bang!  But with foreplay, or highly charged conversation to help get the mindset right, being commanded to COME NOW certainly can have results.  The real point of this exercise is to let me not go into that tranced out post-orgasmic place too soon... there's much to be appreciated in what my Lady does.  And waiting for release until I am granted permission just makes the end all the sweeter.

quote:


* If you are in a relationship with a Dom/me- do you feel like it's inappropriate to seek out someone else to teach you more?


That's something I'd not want to ever do without specific permission. Now, if I see a seminar or a book or whatever that interests me and -- more importantly -- that I think will interest my Lady, then I certainly can bring that to her and ask to go.  And in specific circumstances I've definitely learned things from other play partners... but that's ALWAYS something I discuss ahead of time and get permission for.

(in reply to fungasm)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 7:40:07 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

  For those who asked:  An orgasm without hands is possible.  It's something you have to be trained to do.  It involves a strengthening of the muscles and a strengthening of the will.  Start with Kegels.  Lots of Kegels. For women, this is something better learned in Tantric workshops.  There are some fabulous ones on each of the coasts.


 
I taught myself; it wasn’t that difficult.


_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to fungasm)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 8:13:38 PM   
temptressofsouls


Posts: 208
Joined: 3/29/2005
From: Toledo, OH
Status: offline 		Ok, Im going to answer this base on loose translation and understanding of the subject matter.

I can, fairly easily, orgasm without tactile stimulation, if Im in the right mood-whether its just me not touching anything, or not being touched at all. I need to be in the right mood/frame of mind, though. Most likely, if Im making dinner, "cum now" isnt going to do it....I'd have to be somewhat aroused.

As for "lying there and taking it" if not allowed to touch-I am NOT permitted to be a doormat at any time. If Im not allowed or able to touch, i better be writhing, or moaning, or something. :)

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Q for Subs: Erotic Response w/o Hands? - 8/13/2007 8:51:29 PM   
theq


Posts: 85
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
* If you are in a relationship with a Dom/me- do you feel like it's inappropriate to seek out someone else to teach you more?


Dom Perspective in sub forum....

No, I don't think it is at all. The girl I am seeing (though we have no commitment at this time) came here after we started spending time together...I even intro'd her to the site, if I recall correctly. Bless her kinky lil soul! She's learning a lot! ....hawt lil girl too.

At any rate...again....just my $.02

Mileage and performance of others may vary...

Edited to add: By no, I don't think so at all...I meant posting to a discussion group or talking to someone at a munch...I also read into "someone else" to be another sumissive...albeit a Dominant (ex: posting on Ask a Master) would be ok.

< Message edited by theq -- 8/13/2007 9:03:15 PM >

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 27
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