RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*?

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RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 8:49:47 PM

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Im new to this and even I know this is a bunch of hooey. Who would subscribe to this? I just have this image in my head of Larry Goldchains the used car salesman comming up to me and flashing me his creepiest smile and saying "dont worry Baby, Im Verified." *shudder* Obviously its a ploy to make money by exploiting peoples desperation to be "more dominant than thou." Anyone with half a brain knows that BDSM is about being sincere to your feelings and not keeping up with the latest acronyms.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 8:58:18 PM

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In Taggard's defense, his intentions were good. He believed this might just be a way to make people safe. I don't know Taggard super well but when he was on the boards more often, we chatted and I considered being a part of this. If I'm not, it's for personal reasons. But I do believe that, even though you might not all think this is the perfect solution, nor does he btw, his intentions were to offer a service that might help.

- LA

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RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 9:06:42 PM

mossy

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BlkTallFullfg-thanks so much for sharing that,,,,because i often have exactly that thought and it scares me when i do. Much appreciated. It's comforting to find out i'm not alone in my thinking.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 9:18:44 PM

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Thank you LadyAngelika. I wanted to defend this as well, but really I didn't know how to sound like I knew what I was talking about.
sigh... I have trouble not sounding like a twit sometimes...

(in reply to LadyAngelika)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 10:04:20 PM

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What does it proove? A faker can get the free one without a worry.

I would not pay for one so does that mean im not commited to being a Submissive?

(in reply to quietkitten)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 10:32:06 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mossy

BlkTallFullfg-thanks so much for sharing that,,,,because i often have exactly that thought and it scares me when i do. Much appreciated. It's comforting to find out i'm not alone in my thinking.

Mossy you're very welcome.
Welcome to the boards by the way.. M

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""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to mossy)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 10:50:54 PM

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Anyone can come across as anything here.

Proving oneself only comes face to face-it's not real till it's real people.

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 11:08:53 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Gemeni

Anyone can come across as anything here.

Proving oneself only comes face to face-it's not real till it's real people.

I think that was Taggart's intention when he set up the site (operative word being 'think'). The points made by LadyAngelika are very valid. My problem with the service offered was that one had to be going to events in the United States and I do not live there. My other problem was that My e-mail asking about the service and using the free portion was never replied to. I was using a free mail service though and can appreciate that that does not add to My veracity.

As a 'concept' this kind of service could have some value. It would be nice to be able to verify that the person I am talking to really does exist and is not just a figment of their own imagination.

It does not make Me any more or less real if I could be 'verified' but when I am introduced to someone at a club I do ask My friends what they know about that person and then I take that information into consideration. In what ways is this different?

Gentle Lady

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(in reply to Gemeni)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/4/2005 11:09:44 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

http://www.verifiedbdsm.com

What do people think of this?

Silly. There's no substitute for actually conversing with someone, and having had the conversation, the certificate or lack of one will be immaterial.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 5:54:29 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: slatyb
There's no substitute for actually conversing with someone, and having had the conversation, the certificate or lack of one will be immaterial.

I don't believe that was ever the intent of Verified BDSM. I think it was intended to be one step in the process.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to slatyb)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 5:56:42 AM

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quote:

Thank you LadyAngelika. I wanted to defend this as well, but really I didn't know how to sound like I knew what I was talking about.
sigh... I have trouble not sounding like a twit sometimes...

quietkitten, don't be so hard on yourself. I find you make quite a bit of sense :)

- LA

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Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to quietkitten)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 7:32:31 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

http://www.verifiedbdsm.com

What do people think of this?

Well, since I have not a clue as to what scrotal infusion is I guess I
1. Fail the test
2. Am a fake (or is that a HNG?)

Sorry, people who feel they need to verify others to their "standards" or else they are not worthy of being a part of a lifestyle have their own verification problmes, IMO.

What a bunch of BS (again, IMO)

cello

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 7:35:50 AM

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I agree with the criticism but still see the verification as a positive. Not so positive I'm rushing out to get my diploma or whatever they hand out, but I wouldn't knock those that do.

quote:

Anyone can "fake" being into BDSM.

I don't think so. There will be some portion of the "bottom feeders" who are so clueless that they'd be weeded out. Then there are the folks above that threshold that will educate themselves to get verified, and even the clueless may educate themselves but just be too dumb to learn. So ultimately it could be a good thing.

As for the folks who fake it and get verified, they would still be faking without verification. So the net effect is zero except for the false sense of security. But an educated fake is still better than an uneducated fake IMO.

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(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 7:55:40 AM

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I've watched this thread with mixed feelings.

TD&W contacted me maybe a year ago at B,.com about helping with this and lending some D/s expertise. I am sure his intent was to provide a service, and a valuable service. I'm not sure how best to frame, delive and make meaningful this service, but whetther or not this idea works or not, I know it isn't just 'stupid" and should be laughed at.

I would be more prone to look at it, consider and offer constructive criticism then just say something glib in dismissal.

Let me offer this thought: a man or woman of ill-intent is dangerous anyway, anyhow. Whether we have education or certification programs in place, people who are clever users will always work within the given environment to get what they want.

I'm less thinking of them, than I am of the sort of new person who has a decent heart, really has a strong desire to do BDSM, and is just empty when it comes to knowledge. Maybe one road for that person is to go buy some 101 type books and read as a start. For me, it was trial and error since I was a kid (thank god I didn't kill anyone along the way). Maybe for another person, their foot in the door would be some form of certification.

(in reply to happypervert)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 8:01:34 AM

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I can't believe that some people are actually taking this seriously. I'd immediately cross off someone who volunteered that he had an online bdsm verification certificate as a hopeless phoney.

(in reply to Faramir)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 9:43:24 AM

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I think Taggard's heart was in the right place when he created this site.

People in BDSM SHOULD know the basic terminology before applying it to different facets of their lives. I'm sorry, but I am NOT going to let someone pick up a firewhip and try to use it on me thinking it is a flogger.

People SHOULD network with each other in order to keep information about dangerous people handy (might be a good idea to have some kind of an alert board on here, although I don't know how that could be worked out).

People NEED a place to go to get as much information as they can. I am not saying they will get it from this site, but it is still a good idea to have as much correct information as possible handy.

Regardng the payment thing, there are many sites that ask for money for premium type memberships (bondage.com, alt.com, etc.), so the argument that this is just a money making scheme makes zero sense.

< Message edited by ChainedAngel -- 7/5/2005 9:45:01 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 9:46:40 AM

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quote:

I am aware that it was started by TallDarkandWitty, and that a handful of 'regular' posters from CM moderate the site.

This is correct. Out of that handful after background checks on them 40% were found abusive in one way or another.
Ok, so now you have abusers verifying people? Apparently he has not done the background checks or he would know this as well. Really aren't very hard to do but they take time.

People need to watch and listen. a website isn't going to ever replace that.
Do their own research.

(in reply to darkinshadows)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 10:03:05 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

quote:

I am aware that it was started by TallDarkandWitty, and that a handful of 'regular' posters from CM moderate the site.

This is correct. Out of that handful after background checks on them 40% were found abusive in one way or another.
Ok, so now you have abusers verifying people? Apparently he has not done the background checks or he would know this as well. Really aren't very hard to do but they take time.

Well I am staff on verifiedBDSM.com. I didn't know that my staff status was still active until someone pointed it out to me. I had to go through all the verifications that anyone else did. I was first identified by phone by Lawrence (topcat) and then in person by him (though he didn't enter it) and I was also identified in person by JadeDragon. So I'm not sure what you are refering to.

quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire
People need to watch and listen. a website isn't going to ever replace that.
Do their own research.

In no way, shape or form did Taggard ever imply that this would replace any steps in the verification. However, it is one more tool that people could use. If you don't like the service, then don't use it.

*edited to add: the *you* I'm refering to is a universal *you*, not *you* specifically Gloria

- LA

< Message edited by LadyAngelika -- 7/5/2005 10:04:32 AM >

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RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 10:11:05 AM

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quote:

I didn't know that my staff status was still active until someone pointed it out to me. I had to go through all the verifications that anyone else did. I was first identified by phone by Lawrence (topcat) and then in person by him (though he didn't enter it) and I was also identified in person by JadeDragon. So I'm not sure what you are refering to.

I'm not going to name names...and I said 40% of people from here. Who are on that list? Doesn't necessarily mean you.
However, I happen to like doing research and analysis. Which is why at the time I checked people out?

The site is what it is...inaccurate and ineffective. Nothing wrong with that as long as the proper disclaimers are used.
Topcat himself has said in the past it is ineffective.

As I stated it is not hard to check a person out.

(in reply to LadyAngelika)

RE: verifiedbdsm? BDSM according to *whom*? - 7/5/2005 10:16:26 AM

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quote:

Topcat himself has said in the past it is ineffective.

And yet, like me, he is still staff there. And I know that he is closer to Taggard then I am.

It might be ineffective at the moment, but knowing Taggard, he would be open to hearing ideas of how it could be more effective.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to sub4hire)

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