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Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/22/2004 12:01:13 PM   
Laura


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Just for the interest of debating...

Is a Switch more than a sub topping from the bottom?

Myself, I think we are a class to ourselves. I've been approached by a lot of subs who demand my attention without knowing me or asking what I want. This is what I would label topping from the bottom. Not, someone who feels comfortable as either Top or bottom.
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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/22/2004 12:32:58 PM   
Sinergy


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quote:

Is a Switch more than a sub topping from the bottom?


A switch in bottom mode can top from the bottom, but topping from the bottom and switching are two different things.

A switch is somebody who has bdsm needs on both sides of the flogger, i.e. somebody who both Doms or Tops and bottoms or submits.

The switches that I know in real life have a wide variance on how they express their switching.

Sinergy

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/24/2004 5:48:41 PM   
SherriA


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Laura

Is a Switch more than a sub topping from the bottom?


Yes. I have NO issues with topping from the bottom (or co-topping from the bottom, as I prefer to state it), but switching has nothing to do with that, at least for me. It's like comparing oranges to bathtubs.

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/25/2004 7:47:29 AM   
Voltare


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While the logic behind all of the roles differs (i.e. I Dom because I want to see pleasure in a sub, or I Dom because I enjoy being doted on, or I Dom because it's all I know, etc etc), I would say one of the common elements for a switch seems to be an enjoyment of extremes. I don't know that many real switches in my life, but the ones I -have- met either preferred full on Top or full on Bottom - they were rarely lukewarm about anything (either BDSM or in more mundane pursuits.)

I love to cook. It's relaxing, I like the taste of good food, and I like knowing the people around me enjoy what I do for them. This could be considered a very 'submissive' trait, though in no way do I feel I am submissive because of my culinary talents. This doesn't make me 'switch' either, in my mind just because I enjoy a traditionally submissive activity. Certainly, nothing about my interest has anything to do with co-topping, topping from the bottom, or being topped from my sub.

As another note, I would just suggest that absolutes and definitions of any sort tend to be the source of endless contention. I'm all for discussing 'mechanics' but would suggest to future posters on this thread not to get hung up on the definitions of words. There's loooots of threads on this site already that turned into snipes because of it.

Stephan


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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/25/2004 8:10:27 PM   
LadyBeckett


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I thought "snipes" were those little things that people walk around in the dark holding pillow cases and flashlights attempting to find.....



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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/25/2004 9:06:44 PM   
EStrict


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Actually, the orignal comment seems very illogical to me. To *top from bottom* implies you are taking the control off the dominant. If the person you are *topping* IS a bottom, and you are on TOP, no where in the situation are you the bottom.

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/26/2004 8:22:07 AM   
Jasmyn


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They only top from the bottom if you let them.




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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/26/2004 9:48:56 AM   
EStrict


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

They only top from the bottom if you let them.



Hi Jasmyn,

I might have read the question wrong, but I read it to mean in relationships where they *are* the dominant. If that is the case, who are they topping from bottom, and who is *letting* them? A submissive doesn't *allow* their dominant to be who they are.

If I did read this incorrectly and the origanal poster is speaking of when a switch is the submissive in the relationship, I ask: Are you suggesting that a switch is *always* in top mode, so that even when they are in submissive role of a relationship their *natural* instincts are to try to top from bottom?

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/27/2004 6:29:33 PM   
cellis


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I am a switch. I don't top from the bottom...most the anyway... I don't top my Master, but sometimes I top with Him... other times He prefers to top alone.

I never "let" Him do anything. He does what He wants. I follow.

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/28/2004 7:21:31 AM   
aliljaded1


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ive had a few occations where i as a bratty sub did try to "top from the bottom" i think its it was because i was pushing to see just how far i could take it. im glad i tried .. it lead to a better understanding of where my place is..... a happy bottom dweller<<sp?>



Life is a very Long lesson in Humility ... Top and bottom..




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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 6/29/2004 10:57:17 AM   
Mondschein


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I either top or I bottom. I rarely switch during play. If I decide to bottom I'll be submissive and will not attempt to top and the other way around, but, in some instances, I can switch if the play isn't working for me or my partner.

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RE: Switches: Only Topping from the bottom? - 7/14/2004 1:05:31 PM   
pixieunleashed


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The question being posed as I understood the original posting to be, was if switches were just subs topping from the bottom...that is a labeling issue more than anything else. To go with that idea....I would say, if a switch was a sub topping from the bottom, they would label themselves a sub.

Now we have another issue being raised in this forum as well that I would like to adress and share my opinions on.

Topping from the bottom.......*smiles* interesting concept when dealing with relationships, even short ones that only involve a scene.

My belief is that ALL subs/slaves and switches in bottom mode, top from the bottom. I think this because relationship laws govern it to be true. The one that has the power to say no, is the one with the control, or, the one on top. When a sub/slave has a safe word they can use to stop the scene, they have the control. When a Dominant gives a sub/slave a command, they immediately relinquish the control to the sub/slave, because it is the sub/slave that has the choice now to either obey or reject it. If a Dominant owns/collars a sub/slave and wants to keep them, and abuses them, or does things repeatedly that the sub/slave doesn't like, or never does what the sub/slave likes, the sub/slave always has the optoin to end the relationship, again...putting the sub/slave in control, or on top.

In reality, "topping from the bottom" is something that ALL subs/slaves/bottoms, do. Being rude about it when staying in role however, is an entirely other story. Being rude and demanding while portraying yourself as a submissive/slave is either acceptable or not to the Dominant and they can decide how to best handle that situation.

Myself, I don't deal with rude people.

Thanks for reading this, and have a great day,

pixie


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