|
Youcantmakemeeee -> RE: Begging... (7/11/2005 5:39:16 AM)
|
In my case, I will not beg for release. This has been a problem with most of my previous Dom/mes and some of them never understood. Let me explain why I won't and you can judge whether you understand or not. My very first relationship ever was with a boy from high school. I began dating him my freshman year (he was a senior), and we dated on and off for the next five years. We had sex the first time when I was 14, and we both knew I was too young. So, we agreed to stop for a couple of years. Well, in the five years that I dated him, we had sex twice, TWICE! And the first time was when I was 14! Anyway, being this age and him not having sex with me caused some negative feelings about many things (i.e. sex and myself mainly). When I did finally have sex with him the second time, after years of pleading, I was so self concious that it wasn't fun at all. I didn't cum. From that time on, begging and cumming physically won't happen due to the psychological impact that time had on me.
When I've told this story to past Dom/mes, many said that I just needed positive reinforcement, and therefore, they set out to try and change this in me. I can't tell you exactly what happens, but it's not good. I close up. I won't let the good physical feeling to build anywhere close to cumming. And those that have still insisted upon it didn't last long as my Dom/me. Not that I said, "Because you are making me do this and I don't want to, I no longer wish to be with you." I've never said that. But, subconciously I began pulling away, which eventually led to them not wanting me anymore.
So, now I make sure that any prospective Dom/me knows this about me and accepts that it's one of my limits. I will beg for a lot of things if so desired, but that is one I just won't and can't do.
C.
|
|
|
|
