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NightWindWhisper -> RE: Alternative to vaginal fisting (9/14/2007 5:12:49 PM)
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Try buying "A Hand in the Bush," by Deborah Addington. It can be purchased on Amazon for about $14 delivered.
Addington makes the claim that the size of the womas is irrevelant and I agree.
As you stated your wife had a child--while hormonal changes can cause dryness and sensitivity I'm not aware that it reduces elasticity.
My point of view is that a man (or woman) does not necessarily fist a woman--the best way is that the fister is being fist-fucked by the fistee. If she's aroused enough, and relaxed enough, the fourth finger--like magic will if she is ready, if she is relaxed, if she opens herself to it, fit in, and then the fifth. It's all about relaxation. Using large dildoes could work if done progressively, but the effect will be achieved not by "stretching," rather the effect will be achieved by "acceptance through relaxation."
Fisting is the most connected, most loving, most erotic act a couple can perform. Yet I have never fisted anyone--they have done it all--like magic, when they were ready, when the time was right, and what amazes me the most is there is never, ever, any stretching. My perception is that to engage in intercourse ten minutes after fisting that the vagina feels tighter than it did previously. The reason is that the vaginal tissue can swell quite remarkably. The vagina is a collapsed cavity--if the interior walls are engorged by arousal 10-15mm all around, the net effect is that after the vagina actually feel tighter.
In short--let her fist herself--you are simply the guide and the object--fisting should never "hurt." A delightful feeling of fullness is not hurt... Why not try to achieve the result over several years....? Think of all the fun... It's the journey up the mountain that counts--not the view at the top.
And yes, stitches from episiomtomies can be very problematic, up to the point of considering essentially surgery to correctly replace scar tissue. Episiotomies in my opinion are rarely necessary (ok there's the 4'7" Asian having a baby, whose husband is a 6' 5" marine). Episiotomies in my opinion is the sign of a carelss practitioner unwilling to use some olive oil, some gentle stroking and some patience--avoid most Obstreticians! How's this for a fact: Obstetricians perform 80% of circumcisions, while Pediatricians do about 20%. But--80% of pediatricians use anesthesia on the baby, while only 20% of the Obstretricians do. I think that says something.
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