can't She just let it go?

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can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 5:46:50 AM

yourgrrl

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months ago my first real time d/s relationship ended. without getting into all the details, let's just say it was a mutual decision, it doesn't matter when it is over. yes i am sure both of U/us went through alot of hurt feelings and yes i have some feeling off relief, and now i feel enough time has passed that we can both move on. i believe it isn't right for someone to continue to post and talk about their "former submissive" in a negative light. why not chalk it up to something that wasn't going to work and the fact that it is over? is anything gained by flamming and bashing? i really think She needs to move on with her life and realize that it was a mistake on both our parts.there are two people involved and one was not totally to blame here.

i would like to hear what other Mistress's think in this subject, would they use this forum as a way to air things or just move on ?
thank You in advance for Your comments
yourgrrl

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 7:28:44 AM

earthycouple

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you want her to stop speaking negatively about you yet anyone who knows the two of you and sees you here now knows you are speaking about her negatively.....it all starts at home? Just a thought.

As to your question....people do what people do. you can't let it bother you and anyone who has an interest in you will see you for you and not for what she has to say. So don't sweat the small stuff.

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 9:59:41 AM

pixelslave

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Joined: 8/19/2006
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Not everyone lets go at the same pace (for some it takes years), nor do they have the same outlets to work their feelings out about their past relationships. Many are not able to see their own contributions as to why things didn't work and would rather blame it all on the other, rather than learn from the experience and carry those lessons learned into their future relationships with new partners.

I suggest you try to view it as a reflection on her and not on you. Best to ignore rather than fan the flames. IMO, by addressing them here in public, you only keep them burning hotter and add fuel to them from your side of the equation. If anything, perhaps the two of you need to discuss your differences in private and reach agreement not to discuss things about your past relationship in places such as this where it is hurtful to the other.

- pixel

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< Message edited by pixelslave -- 9/29/2007 10:01:37 AM >

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 10:08:25 AM

LadyPact

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Having not seen the aforementioned posts that you reference, it's difficult for Me to say one way or another. Are the posts that you mention outright bashing, or are the experiences mentioned to state specific points?

Part of the good side of CM is the fact that people do share their real experiences here. If all people ever did was share the good parts, it would sound more like a fairytale land rather that life being what it is..... life. If the posts you mention by your former Dominant are based on the experience that you had together, and they aren't slanderous, it shouldn't be an issue. Is it possible that you are more concerned with being seen in a bad light?

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 1:33:05 PM

brightspot

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No, I would never bring low down talk of an ex here, especially so, if she were involved in or we met here at CM. And if an ex of mine did such, I would not respond to it here.

I practice keeping and dealing with my personal relationships where it all belongs, right in my personal relationships. I also practice good straightforward communication, not a bunch of backround running amok crap.

I can think of almost nothing tackier really.

Just as, I wouldn't involve mutual friends in any of our personal drama, pretty much off limits.

Missy.

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 2:26:06 PM

yourgrrl

Posts: 22
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thank Y/you A/all for your comments and i will not speak of Her again in any kind of light in here, i was venting and it was wrong of me to let it get to me. i can prove that i have moved on with ignoring the comments in the future.
thanks for not being to hard on me,
be well
yourgrrl

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 4:08:59 PM

Celeste43

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Joined: 2/4/2006
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It's easier to not mind what she says if you don't read the comments. Use the block button, that little red hand under her pic or avatar when she posts.

I love the block feature, using it helps me not to sink to the level of some real idiots.

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/29/2007 5:15:14 PM

littlebitxxx

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I'm sorry this is happening to you, it is not pleasant. Immaturity does attack both sides of the D/s equation. Somehow it just seems wrong-er for the D to be the one. Hugs from a sub here. Don't let her get you down, they aren't all like that.

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RE: can't She just let it go? - 9/30/2007 1:51:40 AM

MsCfromMelbourne

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I use past negative and positive experiences to illustrate my point. I think readers want practical life experience, not personal theory

Try not to take it personally. As suggested, block her and get on with your life and find a much better (for you) partner. Happiness is the best revenge. Ask others to never mention her or her life to you again, so your wounds can heal.

Its unfortunate that you both frequent here, but the ideal answer would be to block each another until you both move on

< Message edited by MsCfromMelbourne -- 9/30/2007 1:53:26 AM >

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