quote:

My slave chelle and I have talked with people on this subject so much that I could give an ad lib lecture on the subject, so I thought I'd throw in another few cents worth today since I saw the subject come up on the list.

So, let's get some definitions up on the board here so we're all on the same reference page.

SM - Sadomasochistic activities of any kind.
Sex - The physical act of copulation and/or oral/manual manipulation of the genitalia to produce orgasmic sensation.
D/s - Domination & submission

Ok, now that we're all on the same reference sheet.....

SM activities can (and do) produce erotic/sexual sensations in some people (In psychiatry circles they call this 'aberrant' and 'deviant' behavior, but we all know how full of shit head shrinkers are, huh??) The first time I hit my slave with a four foot signal whip travelling at over 700 miles an hour I got ROCK hard. Yep, I'm a deviant alright. When I take a surgical scalpel in my hand and carve a rose into her flesh (which I'm well known for and do rather frequently), I'm rock hard before, during and after the scene (unless I'm doing a public demo), and she's already been allowed to orgasm at least once (most of the time).

As I said, SM activities can produce sexual results in us really deviant freaks. However......

That doesn't follow that SEX is the *purpose* behind the scene, or even the desired result. More often than not, SEX is the by-product of our kinky natures and doesn't happen for hours after the scene. Nor does it follow that SEX has a single thing to do with the D/s aspects of our relationship. In fact, it only ever has anything to do with the D/s aspect of our way of life insofar as the act of submission goes for the scene (but that submission happened LONG before the scene).

Chelle has people (who often get that glazed over look in their eyes as she's telling them) that the SM *IS* the sex for us, and she's 100% right. Quite often, we're both so sated from the scene itself, that sex is almost an after-thought, anti-climactic.

It should probably be said here that there are probably an equal number of times for us that the SEX is *ALSO* the scene, and that the SM is the after-thought, or only incidental to the sex. (Slapping her luscious ass while I have her bent over a table is just because I'm totally having a good time fucking her, *not* because I'm trying to produce an endorphin rush).

In our personal relationship, we have been asked (on occasions too numerous to count) if we are 'intimate' with each other. What these people are invariably wanting to know is if I love and cherish my property (and of course the answer is yes.) It's understandable that some would think that I'm just a cruel bastard who doesn't give a damn about his slave when they are looking from the outside, in. I mean, all they ever see is the public scene and her serving me in countless ways all the time. They don't see the dance that inevitably leads to the scene. What the really astute observer also sees immediately is the extreme amount of adoration and respect we both have for each other *always* and in all circumstances.

Anyway, in the words of Austin Powers, "I'm spent."

Pleasant regards,
Polaris