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Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 4:00:07 AM   
alittlebent


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Is Sex really considered safe when using a condom or other protection, or should the repercussions of emotions enter into it also? Does anyone consider that it could wreck lives? The participants, their loved ones? i am very interested in your thoughts.
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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 4:05:22 AM   
Celeste43


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Some people can handle casual play and others can't. If you know you can't, then you shouldn't get into it. If you're in a relationship then only you know if it's monogamous, if it's a healthy relationship that fulfills both parties. Someone who's never met your partner isn't likely to know that.

But people don't go out looking unless there's something missing at home.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 4:10:54 AM   
RCdc


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There is not such thing as 'safe' sex.  There is crap sex, great sex, earth moving sex, earth shattering sex.
But safe sex? No.
'Safe' is a word which is misused and misunderstood and only exists in the imagination.
 
the.dark.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 5:41:10 AM   
Dnomyar


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The same as saying "Trust me". 

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 6:30:38 AM   
MrDiscipline44


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This sounds very much like the pretext to a "Is it cheating if", "Why is there so many married" or a "Is it wrong to be married and seeking" kind of question.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 7:50:15 AM   
ddthrill


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Yes.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 7:56:31 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


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NO there is no such animal as safe sex,totally safe sex either psychology or physical..One corrupts the mind and the other the body,This is just this ol' Master opinion of course,,

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 8:05:59 AM   
AquaticSub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: alittlebent

Is Sex really considered safe when using a condom or other protection, or should the repercussions of emotions enter into it also?

Define safe. Sex is never 100 % safe unless you are fluid bonded (and your partner isn't messing around with anyone else). Even still, there is the chance of a condom breaking and making a child. However the risk is smaller or greater depending on the circumstances. A monogamous couple who have been tested and are using a condom or a reliable form of birth control that is being used correctly has a pretty low risk.
quote:


 
 Does anyone consider that it could wreck lives? The participants, their loved ones? i am very interested in your thoughts.



It is my personal belief that making a child does not wreck a life, it simply changes it. Naturally, the people involved may not be ready - there are options, but even if they have it their lives are not wrecked.

Now, if you are talking about STIs, that is a touch different but most are quite controllable even if not curable. With proper medication and following your doctor's orders even those with HIV can now expect to be pretty normal lives, even to the point of getting a negative on a test (though that does not mean you have been cured). The risk is low as long you use condoms correctly and life is full of risks and terminal diseases.

It just boils down to what risks are you willing to take. Having sex will in no way "wreck" my life or my parents' lives no matter what happens. Just change things around.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 8:09:54 AM   
mefisto69


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yeah.......don't worry babe - i won't cum in you






(much)

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 8:26:27 AM   
toservez


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I think from the OP thoughts my question to you is would you like to have to determine by others what you are allowed to do? To have someone come up to you and go I am sorry I do not think what you want matters because I do not think you can handle it? Because in the end we are responsible for ourselves and that includes what risk we are willing to take and live with.

I do not care about power exchange dynamics in the end you and only you are responsible for your own emotions. If someone hurts you by cheating or have a bad sexual encounter the power is not taken from you but can only be given away. The world is what it is and that it is certainly not even close to perfect. Personally instead of hoping the people I interact with in my life do all the right things for me personally I try to take charge of my life and not let others control my happiness.

In terms of health, every single person in the world takes risks because quite simply risk is pretty much everywhere. Some consciously and some subconsciously and those risk come sometimes with consequences. Sex is no different. So for those who do not want any risk in the sex area more power to them. I just prefer not for individual risks to be debated in a right or wrong moral judgment way. It is classic throwing rocks when living in a glass house. It is the smoker telling the person eating the fast food how bad that is for them. It is the person who rides motorcycles warning a person about sexual diseases.

We all take risks in our lives. For most of us hopefully we take as much precaution to minimalize the risks we do take. For me personally I draw the line at judging risks on an individual basis based on preferences and values then using worst case scenarios and the assumption others are idiots as my thoughts on life.

Edited to less butcher the language

< Message edited by toservez -- 10/12/2007 8:38:20 AM >


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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 8:39:15 AM   
imtempting


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Apart from health sides speaking on the emotions sex can hurt bad.

One person could get feelings and feel used.  Sex can easily break up friendships. .

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 8:47:32 AM   
AquaticSub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

Apart from health sides speaking on the emotions sex can hurt bad.

One person could get feelings and feel used.  Sex can easily break up friendships. .



Sex can also strengthen friendships though. I have several people who I used to have sex with, or had sex with once, and we are still friends and joke about it. Two of them are still my very best friends.

It really just depends on the people involved. I've lost friendships over something as (to me) trival as going out with someone's ex when they broke up years before.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to imtempting)
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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 11:30:42 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


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condoms aren't the ultimate protection when it comes to safe sex - yes one can poke holes and/or break the rubber. if there's no emotion behind the sexual intercourse, yes there would be reprecussions for either party which is why i prefer not to have casual/play partners. i chose to wait (almost 2yrs) for the right person to share sexual side of BDSM with and it has paid off by meeting my SO/Dom.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 12:21:25 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

There is not such thing as 'safe' sex.  There is crap sex, great sex, earth moving sex, earth shattering sex.
But safe sex? No.
'Safe' is a word which is misused and misunderstood and only exists in the imagination.
 
the.dark.


I loved what you said.....but I think my mom and dad had what was called safe sex....it was a one off apparently, in the dark and she never slept with him again.......mind you it did procreate and i was the result so maybe not so safe afterall  !

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 1:39:38 PM   
RRafe


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safe sex=get tested for everything under the sun, then don't fuck anyone out of the circle you know tested negative. Anything else is UNSAFE-a test is only as good as the moment the blood was drawn. You can get infected fifteen minutes later-and it means nothing.

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 2:09:17 PM   
proudsub


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quote:

Is Sex really considered safe when using a condom or other protection


No, condoms don't protect against HPV transmission.

quote:

Does anyone consider that it could wreck lives? 


Yes if you're cheating on someone or if you end up with an unwanted pregnancy.

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proudsub

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 2:16:22 PM   
laurell3


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The OP isn't at all clear on their question, but honestly most people don't practice "safe sex".  Many use protection for actual intercourse, most use it at all times for anal (wise idea), but I don't know many that use it for oral. (and I'm not criticizing here, I don't use it for oral either because I find it kind of defeats the purpose).

OP I don't know if you're referring to marital status or implying people in the lifestyle are promiscious and not careful about whom they are with.  With regard to the first, that's an individual choice and I won't condemn anyone without fully knowing the reasons and details and even then, who am I or any of us to judge?  With regard to the second, I think what one finds overall is that although the vanilla perception is that lifestylers are more promiscious, which makes these sites a troll factory, quite the opposite is true in general from my experience.

Maybe if you come back and give us more information on exactly what your concern is we can provide some insight, or at the least heated debate and moderately amusing humor.

l

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 10/12/2007 2:33:23 PM >

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 3:42:41 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: mefisto69

yeah.......don't worry babe - i won't cum in you






(much)

I have had to suspend myself frpm thr ceiling just to view your pic....how safe are you did you say?

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 3:44:09 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

quote:

Is Sex really considered safe when using a condom or other protection


No, condoms don't protect against HPV transmission.




Yes if they are over then end of a cucumber.....

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RE: Safe sex ? - 10/12/2007 4:00:34 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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What?  Be responsible for my actions and consider the consequences of my choices?  Ew!

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