stella41b
Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Woodhunter
Please delve deep into your psyche 'cause there has to be a better answer than just "I was born this way."
Okay, so you're looking for a 'better' answer - here's mine. Let you and the others work it out for yourselves.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Woodhunter
What make's you feel you need to be controlled, beaten, humiliated or abused? Did you have a parent that was abusive? Where you molested when you were younger? Where you neglected emotionaly by a family member or some one you deeply loved? What void in your life are you trying to fill by seeking out a Master or Mistress to dominate ever you.
Here I can give you three answers.
1. I am a TS (transsexual female). My physical body is male, however my soul, mind, heart, and the rest of the inside of me is female. I'm not sure whether you have kids or not, but there's no greater experience to an adult than the birth of their own child. I was born a healthy 'boy', only that's how it appeared on the outside. However try to imagine how I felt, I was a girl but ended up with this body of a boy - which sort of pissed me off greatly in my childhood. Ah but you see, I'm human, just like everyone else, so like everyone else I didn't work it out until later, until I was about 13 years old. Up until that time I just felt 'different', I had this tremendous inner conflict inside me, all I knew that people were treating me differently to the way I felt and I couldn't understand why. I discovered at 13 and went to my parents, for who - and I guess you people can figure it out - I was their son, and this 'son' suddenly starts wanting to be a girl. It freaked them completely. Their reaction freaked me completely, as did the reaction of other people through my teens. It took me 27 years of my life to come out successfully, and I have only just managed to overcome all the issues I've had in my own head because of this.
However as a child I became rebellious, eccentric, wilful, stubborn, unpredictable, antisocial, and as a result through being a diffiult child I was beaten and chastised constantly by my parents.
I was born in 1966. July. I'm a Sun Cancerian, Virgo rising, Virgo Moon... together with the Virgo rising and Virgo Moon I got that powerful Uranus-Pluto conjunction which caused the social upheaval in the mid-1960's in the States and I'm part of that generation which is bringing the world advances in technology and healthcare but also the same generation causing mass unemployment and problems with healthcare. However with me working against myself control and discipline have always been major issues in my life.
Yes I can be a genius, some people say that I am, but the way my life worked out meant that yes, I've had my birlliant moments but I have been living mainly on the edge of life, on the edge of insanity and madness until I recently worked it out by way of an astrological consultation.
But I was lucky. At the age of 16 I found the Church and became a born again Christian. At the age of 17 I changed, experimented briefly with Islam, and found Buddhism, did the 3 month stint with a Master from India, and that is how I've got through, pulled myself together and have now overcome my issues with control and discipline. I follow the Buddhist philosophy in my life totally, thuis is the basis of my life.
Being a believer in reincarnation I have a theory (not proven, just a theory) that not only was I 'born this way' but also that 'I chose to be born this way'.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Woodhunter
I am a Dom that's new to BDSM and have a fetish for light bondage and find there are some very sadistic Master's/Dom's out there that you sub's/slave's seem to gravitate to and I don't know why. Fisting, mutilation, beaten unconscious, ritual murder, choking, male sub's forced into unprotected sex with other men for no other reason than their Master/Mistress said so. Why??? When you acquire AID's and your Master/Mistress/Dom/Domme kick's you out the door because he/she has used you all up, then what are you going to do?
There is good and evil in this world, there really is. And like it or not good exists alongside evil and evil exists alongside good, and it has to be that way so that we can learn to recognise one from the other. Some people are weak, and some people are strong. However we all make mistakes, we all make the wrong decisions, and we all have to suffer the consequences for the things we think, say and do which are wrong.
Being a Buddhist I believe in Karma - the law of consequence. Everything you say, everything you think, everything you do, and every single experience you go through has some sort of consequence, some sort of meaning.
I strongly disagree with the view presented above that just because someone is a Dom and a sadist that they are abusive and that they are bad people.
I see it completely differently. We know that there is good and evil in the world, and we know from the above fragment I have quoted that people are capable of being both good and evil. We know that there is a law of Karma and each and every thought, word spoken or written, and each and every action brings a consequence. We all know that we all make mistakes, we make the wrong decisions, or do things at the wrong time. It is from the things we do wrong and our mistakes that we learn such things as guilt, fear, prejudice, and regret, and these are things which build up inside us, inside our very souls as we all go through life.
This is where I see the attraction of BDSM for people. It's easy to go on about all the fakes, and the liars, and the psychos and the idiots, but when you stop and think about it, and I mean really stop and think about it, the BDSM community is also full of really good people - and these good people can be found both as submissives and Dominants.
BDSM is good for the soul. BDSM requires human interaction, therefore it requires good qualities such as trust, friendship, kindness, warmth, understanding, even love. And I for one see a slave and a submissive as being just as good as a Dominant, irrespective of whether they are a sadist or not, they are all good people. How so?
Consider that we have all made mistakes and carry regrets and we all therefore carry such things inside us as fear, regret, guilt, and insecurity. These are things which we all need to be released from, they are bad for our soul, bad for our Karma. We don't need bad Karma, it makes death a terrible experience and also makes the period of death between lives (my belief again) an incredibly long and lonely journey, much longer than life. Life is short by comparison.
Now we all need to be released, and it is that feeling of release which I feel gives us either domspace or subspace. But to achieve that we need to atone for the things we have done wrong, we have to pay for our mistakes, and we pay for that through experiencing pain and restriction. It cleanses us, it cleanses our souls.
Consider also that there are two different ways of giving, you can either provide or you can serve. Doms are providers, and subs and slaves are servers. Therefore Doms take control and through their control they provide release, and subs and slaves through their loss of control they achieve release and they are released, and as a result in releasing the sub from their guilt, fear, insecurity and regret the Dom is also released from their's through the act of giving, or if you prefer a sort of charity. On the basis of my reasoning here I form the view that the BDSM community is full of good people irrespective of what role they play.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Woodhunter
What have you missed out of in life that has led you down this path? Do you love pain and suffering? Does it feel THAT good?
Second question first - pain and suffering releases us from our guilt, fears, insecurities and regrets. Next, third question - yes, it feels damn good to let go of your guilt, fears, insecurities and regrets to discover truth, wisdom, happiness and fulfilment.
And this to me answers the first question above. What have I missed out on in life? Well pretty much the same as everyone else - Nirvana, or if you prefer Perfect Enlightenment. We are not God (though some people may mistakenly believe they are equal to God) we are human, we are mortal, we make mistakes, we are far from perfect, we are all learning, we are all experiencing, and it is this learning process and series of experiences that lead us all down the same path. And that path is quite simply called LIFE.
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RE: What were you missing in life? - 
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