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Monks might have the right idea. - 7/1/2004 7:13:13 PM

amaleslave

Posts: 7
Joined: 6/8/2004
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i just recently spent 6 months in service to A Lady. i cleaned Her house, mowed Her lawn, fixed Her house problems, etc. Meanwhile She assurred me that She was totally poly and Her lazy husband had nothing to say.
i served Her intimately, he said nothing. i remained in chastity the entire time, being faithful to Her.
i adored Her and loved Her. Then comes the hammer. She takes me aside and tells me that i can no longer serve Her intimately, with as you all know by this time, my tongue only and i must pay Her to be in Her presence.
i am a good looking man, have money, but find a problem with that demand. i pulled my" out of contract" and left. Now She calls me daily, saying She wants me back. i told Her that when money gets involved in a D's relationship, it goes down hill from there. i told Her that from day one. i was not cheap and spent money on Her and for Her friends and family over the 6 months, without reservations. Bought Her kids clothes, payed for car repairs, payed mortgages, etc.
My question is, i am i wrong in saying, NO. i rather be alone then be abused anymore. After-all, a slave has feelings. Contrary to all the so called sub-lime rantings.
i have a problem with Women that say give it all to me, not even considering that i have children to provide for.
Well, that's my vent.
amaleslave.

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/1/2004 7:56:59 PM

Sylverdawn

Posts: 1123
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Self respect is priceless... and thats a fact

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/1/2004 8:46:48 PM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
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quote:

My question is, i am i wrong in saying, NO. i rather be alone then be abused anymore.

It doesnt actually sound like a question.

You are not wrong in saying no, imho. You told her up front what you were willing to give to her and she changed the rules on you.

What she tried to do to you (violate your limits) is not D/s from my perspective. I suspect other people will have other opinions, but.

From the other side of the coin, my first submissive used threatening to give me her collar back as a means of emotional blackmail. It didnt work the first time she tried, and I warned her that she would do it one too many times.

She did, I was nice enough to give her bus fare home. The relationship ended. She begged me to take her back, but to no avail.

The sad thing is that your former Domme will simply go do the SAME thing to another unsuspecting person.

Sinergy

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/2/2004 8:19:41 AM

winterlily

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Joined: 6/30/2004
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Im sorry that you have had to suffer this. Removing a collar is never easy, especially on bitter terms. You have my sympathy. *hugs* You are not alone tho. I have had this happen as well. It wasn't money, but other things such as using my knowledge of graphics and web design to make HIM money by building full sites for family and friends of his. I was also editing videos (which he was getting paid 1200 a pop for) and creating book covers for him as well. Yes, he thought he was the next Tony Robins. One day he approached me with yet another job to do (I was already doing 3 pages and a handful of other things) and when I refused the job politely due to the fact that I was very ill thanks to being pregnant and already bogged down with all of his other tasks, he turned to me and goes "well here's the deal..I need the income" I was absolutely speechless. All I could do was stare at him. I repeated myself once again much to his displeasure and a few days later wrote him an email explaining that I was mentally and emotionally done with him. He then emailed me back telling me that "I will NOT remove my collar and I WILL serv him and do as he says!" Thats was 3 years ago and I havent spoken to him since. He is the one experience that has made me really opened my eyes to people. Not just in the D/s lifestyle but in everyday life as well. You are certainly not alone my friend. *BIG HUGS*

< Message edited by winterlily -- 7/2/2004 8:21:55 AM >

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/2/2004 1:02:04 PM

Sundew02

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Joined: 2/6/2004
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It is painful to say, but D/s is just as filled with inconsiderate users as the vanilla world. You were not wrong, and the need to vent is basic to all humans. Hopefully through your local D/s groups, or people you meet here on colarme, will turn into real flesh and blood friends that you can speak to in person. My typed words are cold comfort. But as you can see, Dominants and submissives alike understand your pain and disappointment. Be safe, good luck in finding a true Domme. Sundew

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/2/2004 1:48:34 PM

MistressDREAD

Posts: 2943
Joined: 1/1/2004
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That is the whole purpose of a contract
and it was a good thing for you that you
had one to present in My opinion. Stop
feeling lousy over your choice to live up
to the contract you were provided by the
Dominant. Contracts are broken every day
and there is a basic and big differance in
finacial Domination and Usership. The issue
of money Dominantion should of been in the
contract in detail of whats to be provided and
whom is to take care of what. I as the Dominant
have always taken complete care and controled
finacially the aspects of My slaves with this being
in contract befor hand and it shouldent of been you
in My opinion that should of even been worried about
your children as your Dominant should of been seeing
to all their needs with your funding, but as I said each
one of Us Dominants do things differently. you dont
have to be a monk to get it right, simply remember
the next go around to have a more detailed contract
of your yes's and no's and do's and dont's and expect
to live up to them and expect to have Them live up to
Theirs as well. Im sure youll find servitude again and
again find pleasures in such. One comment I would
like to make notice of here. I find your belittlement
of the situation to be rude for a suplicant and the
comments of the Mistresses Mate are totally Out
of Order. you stated that you adored her and loved
her. If this was the fact you would even apon disagreements
and a breakup show those whom you profess love to respect
and those that are a part of whom They are. you stated
your self that She stated that She was Poly. Hence when
you entered that relationship you accepted others with in it
and as a suplicant it is not your place to judge others in the
relationship no matter if they are suplicant or Dominant or
Vanilla in the relationship. Search your heart and find what
it truly is that you seek and be upfront in this. it doesent
matter how you look or your age or financial status when
it comes to servitude. If a Dominant desires sumthing or
the absence of sumthing then it is the place of the suplicant
to serve in such a way with out question if it is with in the
agreed contract. I kind of see a tit for tat in that you dident
seem to have any issue giving her funds till you no longer
could tongue her and I find this to be blackmail to serve your
own purpose and not that of the Dominant. Monks give up
all to serve their God, did you give up all to serve your Godess?
I think not. Watch out suplicant how you throw around those words
adore and love or sumone might take them seriously from you.

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/2/2004 7:37:12 PM

amaleslave

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i am very honored by the responses i have recieved here. i bow my head in respect. i shall enjoy being here. To make an update on the situation, i have changed my cell phone number and it is time to move on. To give You an idea how this submissve soul works.
About 8 months ago i found a Lady in need that was dumped on by Her husband and left with a less than desirable house. i have helped Her bring the abode up to standards. I work one day a week on these endeavors. It needs a few more weeks of work, but She now has it on the market and can look forward to getting Herself back on Her own feet, where She desires to be. The thing here is that over the last few months i helped this Lady with physical labor, materials, etc and the one thing that made me feel what i am is when i have seen Her smile. There is no physical, romantic, or sexual contact between us. Just hugs as friends.
This is what i am about. That to me is what the submissive soul is about. Helping those in need without a reason.
Mistress Dread, You ask did i give to Ma'am like the monks give to their God. i gave Her my submissive heart completely.
Yes, i have feelings. i cry, i laugh, i smile and i frown. I may be a slave by nature, but i am a person.
Thank You for allowing me to be part of Your realm.
amaleslave, dee.

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/3/2004 5:01:32 AM

MistressDREAD

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Joined: 1/1/2004
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We are All people here dee
and I beleive that a person
has a right to defence and
if a person intends to accuse
then a person should be sure
to have the one they make
accusations to be present or
not say anything at all. I hear
of the word manners being
thrown around these boards
but not many being utilized as
they should and one that sticks
out in My mind concerning this
post is : If you cannot say anything
nice say nothing at all. I am glad
to see dee that your words have
taken a 360 degree change and
what you have wrote now sounds
much more like a true slaves heart.
Taking comforts in your deeds as
apposed to the misdeeds of Others.
Keep that lil green monster at bay
dee and you will find your frame of
mind will be better for it. Have a good
independance day. ~smiles~

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RE: Monks might have the right idea. - 7/5/2004 6:56:43 PM

ShadeDiva

Posts: 1005
Joined: 3/31/2004
From: Sacramento, California
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*smile*

I think you were totally fine.

Bravo to you!

~ShadeDiva

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